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Tag: married life

126 – Spring Break ends

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Finally! Today is the first Day of School for our Son since Friday March 13…..

T-H-A-T explains everything……. the last day of school was Friday the 13th! That’s what caused COVID and home school and the longest Spring Break ever. Glad to finally have all the answers! Ha!

Seriously, today is the first day back to school and the first one he’s gotten to drive himself too! (He turned 16 in the middle of the shutdown.).

So i did not drink my coffee in the nude this morning. But our Son was hardly out of the driveway and David said, “You should probably go edge now.”

While i knew that meant there really was no maybe, should, could, might to it…. that’s not what he S-A-I-D. So i got all cheeky ….. or one might say bratty….. and said, “i think you should drop the passive and just be aggressive when speaking to me.” And i immediately got my ass out of the chair and went to do it. (i got a raised eyebrow and a look but i didn’t land myself in trouble! Thank Goodness!)

Then i got in the shower. And he came in and said, “you chose to shower instead of edge??”

i said, “i already edged.”

He said, “that wasn’t long enough.”

i said, “you weren’t explicit or clear about the time either. i need details if you have something in your head.”

He said, “when you get out, edge again. And then come find me so i can check how wet you are.”

So i did. i was definitely wet!

And he proceeded to play with my puss then too. He knows from my facial expressions when i am close to orgasm. He said, “Don’t cum! You don’t get to do that until Friday…. with B&J! We will do this daily to be sure you are wet and ready for them too!”

Great…. a (work) week of edging. Again…. this week just can’t go by fast enough!!!!!

Sooooo ready to see BJ on Friday night! Time to get schooled properly!!

And our son made it to school on time, early in fact, and texted me to tell me he was there. He was actually happy to start school and be back “to normal”. Now for the rest of us to get there too!!

Hugs,

Marie

125 – Exciting weekend

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Not this past one…. but the one Coming up!

You may remember me telling you about our hot date Friday night’s (2-in a row) with BJ.

Well we have still been talking and it’s been two more weeks now. We haven’t been able to make our schedules work to get together since the last dinner. But we all want to.

i won’t deny, our schedule has been the primary problem and i worried that BJ would think we were giving them a brush-off. i’m still a little worried about it, but since we are all still chatting daily, i’m not toooooo worried.

And it seems this Friday coming up (today is Monday), we are going to get together.

This time it WILL be to get naked. We have all agreed and discussed that’s what we want next. That’s the thing about swingers…. we actually TALK and tell one another, “I want to get naked and fuck you.” Whereas when you are (unmarried) and dating, most people tend to not talk and tend to make one another “guess” what the other might be thinking or wanting.

This is why swingers are amazing!

So with our latest chat with BJ (i just love putting their initials together like that!! He he!!), we intend to get naked, fuck one another, and have fun…. this Friday! We have to still work out logistics like where…. and what to tell the kids (they have one teen in the house too). But we have a preliminary plan!

And i couldn’t be more excited!!

Typically if it’s a match sexually, then swingers meet again (and again). And at some point, they become your friends AND lovers. And you even break off in smaller groups – like maybe just me and B would go out and have sex, or just me and J, or David & J. Or do “everyday stuff” like movies or shopping together too! But we haven’t really made it too far with too many couples really. We have gotten to a “few more dates” stage before, but that’s usually when someone isn’t interested or it gets boring or schedules conflict or or or. i haven’t gotten that vibe at all with BJ, which is amazing! i feel they may be our soul-mates for awhile! ❤️. But i suppose we will know more in the coming week(s)…. especially after this Friday!

So this week needs to flyyyyy by fast! Can you distract me from watching the clock with some interesting tid bit in your life?!?!

Hugs,

Marie

124 – Being Naked

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i have been experimenting with being naked. i’ve never been one it want to be naked. I feel …. exposed. Nowhere to hide. All of my flaws are out on display.

i think my feelings (fears!) are normal. While i haven’t asked anyone specifically, i did ask Google.

i found several articles stating the many benefits of being nude, with the primary ones being to grow self-esteem, self-respect, and become less self-conscience.

i started with just sleeping naked. And even that was hard. i like to cover up. All the fat, scars, and imperfections! So i slept with a lot of covers pulled all the way to my neck.

And when i got hot….. it was an intentional decision to then shed some of the covers.

But it turns out that sleeping nude is a health benefit too. Your body has a lot to “do” when we sleep – regenerate cells and digest food among them – and having a lower body temp can promote that. So having less clothing is ideal to help your body find its best natural state, u less of course you out on SO many covers you raise your body temp instead of lowering it!!

So despite the articles and encouragement from Google, i still feel…. exposed. After giving birth, and being a mature adult…. of course i have scars and “life” shows itself on my body.

And yet, David likes it. He said it is sexy to see all that’s his on display. Or easy access. Or both!

(And easy access promotes sexual activities, which is also stated as a benefit of being nude!)

Being naked (more) was my idea at the start and it grew into something that now he likes too. Ok, fine…. he probably liked it from the start! But now he’s told me he likes it.

He says he won’t be naked…. even to sleep. Because that’s his purview to decide that and he decided no. (Big tease!)

So i am learning to like it. But i don’t know if i like-like it yet either. That’s how i am…. try it on for size and if it fits, then keep it. Otherwise, shrug it off and try on something new.

After “just” sleeping, now i have expanded to drinking my coffee in the morning in the nude too. (The new routine in the morning didn’t last long! i am just not a “get out of bed and ‘go’ kinda person! i’ve tried!)

i now sit on the couch drinking coffee, reading emails, surfing the internet and writing posts….. while nude. And Sir walks by, looks, and smiles. Sometimes he touches but most of the time he doesn’t. (Which adds to the self conscience feelings since i’m nude and he is not…. and he is now looking at me).

But now it’s even grown to the place that when we are alone (Aka: our son not home), he wants me to shed clothes and be naked as much as possible.

i suppose this might be like the no panties and no bra thing. i now don’t think twice about those things. And i am extremely comfortable with it. i hardly ever wear those things now….. and when i do it actually feels odd now. But it took awhile to embrace that too. So this will probably be the same!

So right now, i’m not sure if i like this new thing or not. i want to like it. Does that count?

Maybe i’ll get to go to a nude beach sometime too…. but that may not happen til next summer…. or at all, especially if David continues to exercise his right to keep his clothes on.

Oh – and since winter is upon us, maybe this nude thing won’t last either…. i mean, it’s cold in winter! And really, that’s a big problem for me around the house already….. i am cold! Hmmm. We shall see!

i guess i need to read more articles and build up my self confidence even more!

What about you? Do you spend time nude? How was it in the beginning?

Hugs,

Marie

123 – what to do when he’s wrong…. and i tell him too?!

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In a previous post, i made a point to tell you that (in most cases), it doesn’t matter if he’s wrong. That even if/when he’s wrong, if it doesn’t matter, i just submit. And let the “wrong” go.

That there’s no real point to saying, “you are wrong!” As in, what purpose does that serve? So i also said then that is when i just don’t say it (“it” being that he’s wrong). And i keep my mouth shut and just submit.

And yet….. sometimes i don’t. i don’t always do as i say and just keep my mouth shut nor do i just submit. Saying it and doing it aren’t always the same. i fully admit that!

And no sooner than i had told you about how submissive i was, did i do the complete opposite!

Last night, David cooked dinner (as always! He cooks, i clean!). And he made boiled shrimp. Yummmm!)

In his cooking, he had a plastic jar of spices that he had used that when i went to put away, i saw the plastic lid was all cut up while still on the jar. That was strange. Wouldn’t it be easier to take the lid off?!? So i asked him, but not in a submissive way.

i showed him the lid and said, “uhmmm why?”

Ok… not only did i not just let it go with the “it doesn’t matter” thought, but i didn’t even exactly ask about it the right way either! i get it and i agree…. now! Thankfully, while i did get a raised eyebrow that said, “is that the right way to speak to me?” that was ALL i got!

What he actually said aloud was, “I couldn’t get the lid off. It was stuck. So I cut it open.”

Now here’s the second opportunity for me to just let it go. But did i??? Uhmmmm no. Of course not! Geez. Didn’t i learn anything when i posted about “it just doesn’t matter”? Apparently not!

i then grabbed the lid and unscrewed it and said, “you couldn’t do this?”

Yeah…. i know….. not a submissive move …. again! i knew it was rather edgy even then too, but i thought it was funny… so i did it.

Again, i deserved more than a raised eyebrow, but didn’t get it. This is one of those times that i’m adding straws to the camel’s back, but it didn’t break. Sooooo when it does break, like what has happened before, i’ll get a goodddddddd and well-deserved punishment too.

Our son heard this entire exchange and looked at me and said, “maybe by cutting it open, it broke the vacuum seal that was possibly there before.”

And David said, “it didn’t unscrew like that before and maybe J is right.”

Our son helped (defend) David. Even our son knew, on some level, that my words and calling David out on his actions that i had deemed “wrong” was probably more wrong than David. Does that sentence read right? i’m trying to say that i was more wrong than David!

So in my quest to show David how wrong he was, i was the one who became “wrong.”

Let’s face it, David was kind in how he responded to my lack of submission. But he certainly didn’t have to be!

Ok. So. Back to the point. No matter WHY he cut open the lid instead of unscrewing it, it really didn’t matter. i mean truly, what did it matter? While it was the “wrong” way to open a jar, he was ingenious to figure out a way to still use its contents and get dinner made. So WHY exactly i felt the need to call David out on it is really a bit beyond me! What was my point in showing David he was wrong when really, he wasn’t. Maybe the jar didn’t open. Maybe this was a better way to use what was inside without breaking the jar or just throwing it away. And what was my point of pointing it out to David that i could now open it just fine? It seemed i wanted to prove i was superior and he was not. Yet, that’s not what submission is all about. Is it? And even our son knew it too….. on his teen/ not-knowing-his-parent’s-marriage-dynamic level.

So i have to take a dose of my own medicine….. and just let it go, remember it just doesn’t matter, and …..

i AM SUBMISSIVE.

Many hugs,

Marie

Day 19: My submissiveness

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DAY 19: LIFE CHANGING…Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life? If so, what are they?

This is going to sound crazy, but our sex life is 1,000% better than it was before we implemented our D/s, DD relationship.

We simply had grown boring and basically stopped having sex. i’d tell David we were roommates with the same last name.

Now… we have some sort of sexual-activity pretty much daily. It may be as little as a text (or “sext”!) or as much as the full blown intercourse. But no matter, the sexual energy is alive and well again. And it was dead and gone before.

i think this may be in part because my submission to David has built up his ego and confidence, and the respect he deserved. So by me giving him that mental boost, it has become a huge turn on … for us both!

And while my goal at the onset and what i hoped for with this dynamic was for us to fight less, it has actually become more than that even! Besides less fighting and more sex, it also improved our communications too.

David no longer says things like, “I think maybe you should consider blah, blah, blah.” I always found all those qualifiers to just be confusing. Does that mean i definitely should or that you definitely think i might should or that you might think i definitely should?? Even that sentence is confusing! Right?

While those sentences do sometimes still happen, more often than not now, he says, “you need to xyz” or just “go do xyz” works too. Much more direct and straightforward. And when those confusing sentences come, now i just say, “i’m unclear about your intention Sir. Can you speak more directly please?”

So our conversations are more direct. And ultimately more clear.

So yes, there’s been several improvements in our marriage that while on this side it seems obvious (a “duh” moment), i didn’t necessarily expect many of these things at the outset either.

What changed in your world by implementing the dynamic you have?

Hugs,

Marie