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Tag: deep thoughts

306 – Spanked with a belt in 1923

Written by Marie on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 306 – Spanked with a belt in 1923

SPOILER ALERT… if you watch 1923 the tv show, but haven’t seen the latest episode(s), you probably don’t want to read anything more.

^^ These two. In the Paramount TV “1923.” They have had TWO spanking scenes.

If you like Yellowstone and have now been watching 1923, you probably have seen the TWO scenes i am speaking of. And if you haven’t seen the show, maybe consider it.

i tried googling the show and these scenes, but didn’t come up with much…. So

here’s the summary…..

SCENE 1:

They are prostitutes. Hired by a really rich guy to keep him company, but instead of enjoying his spoils, he gets arrested just when they are in his bed and making out with each other.

Then the rich guy asks another rich guy to get the two out of his house, while rich guy #1 is incarcerated. Rich guy #2 goes to the house and meets these two, while they are half dressed and in the kitchen eating (the photo above.). He goes to pay them for their time, and Brown headed says, “That’s too much.”

And Rich Guy says, “who says we are done?”

That’s when Rich Guy tells brown headed girl to lay down across the counter top, and he pulls his belt off and hands it to Red Headed. He tells her to whip Brown Headed girl, and Red headed does it with reluctance.

After just a couple of swings of the belt, Brown Headed girl let’s out some rather loud yells of pain, to which Rich Guy makes it clear he wants to hear none of that and she needs to stop. And she does.

He gets somewhat irritated and takes back the belt, and swings it HARD to show Red Headed how to do it with power and purpose and authority. Then he hands the belt back to her and demands that Red Headed spanks Brown Headed with the same fervor as he did. And she does, but again reluctantly. Before long, Brown Headed is begging for it to stop and tears are falling.

SCENE 2:

A few episodes later … the girls are back. And Red Headed already has Brown Headed in tears by whipping her with intense swings of the belt against her bare ass.

Rich Guy stops her and says, (more or less… not the EXACT words though.. quoting this from memory)…. “You probably think I am enjoying seeing her be whipped. That’s not it. I enjoy seeing YOU…with that power and control and authority. Think about the POWER you have. Dwell on it. Enjoy it.”

After a brief pause, he continued, “Now. Go back and start again, and when you do, truly think about your AUTHORITY and POWER.”

Rich guy then watches as Red Headed truly starts to enjoy herself and whips the Brown Headed with a newfound zeal.

THAT is when he orders her to stop. He takes the belt from her, leans over to Brown Headed and says, “your turn.” He tells Red Headed to Assume The Position (my words, not his!) and demands she take what Brown Headed dishes out next.

Brown Headed delivers a rage filled spanking in short order, while yelling out sounds of anger and aggression but with no coherent words.

And the camera cuts to Rich Guy’s face, who is sitting in a nearby chair drinking a whiskey, and smiling big.

That brings me to us….

While watching the scene(s), Sir said, “Does that make you all juicy?”

And the truth of the matter is… it did. At least at first. When the Brown Headed went all crazy lunatic on the Red Headed, i cringed. But the rest of it… i loved.

There was a lot to unpack in those scenes though too. It was more than me getting wet. And David knew it too. And he asked me to elaborate.Here is all that i said…

So I have mixed feelings about those scenes.

I think it is sexy as all get out to have a woman submit. It does get me wet. It made me wet to see the (Brown headed) girl spanked — but also the other (Red Headed) girl was being submissive to do the spanking too.. just as she was told to do.

I think taking the spanking that is given (without a safe word) by the dominant is a sign of true submission. It makes me feel like my mind has conquered my body and endured…. And have accomplished something, achieved a goal… just as I was told to do. I ultimately gave up the power.

So to that, I can totally relate to the (Rich guy) man saying it’s about the power that’s a turn on. When the Brown Headed girl takes the spanking, she’s allowing the Red Headed girl (and him) to have the power … and Brown Headed accepts it.

But here’s where the mixed part comes in — because I’m not too sure either girl is WILLINGLY doing it, I think they are (in large part) being MADE to do it. That part I don’t like.

When I submit fully and willingly hand over all control to be spanked or put in chastity without the key —- turns into a “you are a good girl” moment and a “I’m proud of you” kind of thing. It’s when I want you to spank HARD and then praise me for being so good (and willing).

I did NOT like it at all when Brown Headed girl (original one to BE spanked who then got the belt handed to her) was allowed to have that much rage and complete aggression against her original spanker. But I think that was what Rich Guy wanted! I don’t think spankings should ever be about rage…. Then it’s just a beating. And THAT I didn’t like at all!

When it’s controlled power, and willing submission, it’s about acceptance of who has the authority and who does not. And giving up the control — fully — is what I crave. I want to get to the place where I don’t ever have or use safe words … because I totally and completely yield to your authority!

And like I said above — in some ways the scenes with the girls are a turn on because they are submitting fully (both of them!), but then it’s mixed for me as I think they are doing it from a forced position too. (But the second time – last night’s show – made me think that they willingly did it on some level as they came back for more, presumably on their own free will… and right?!)

How’s that for my thoughts Sir?

[by the way … I’m going to put my belt on tonight. You can decide when it comes off. I think I need to be reminded that it’s not mine to play with and this is after I laid in bed and rubbed myself to orgasm right beside you last night.]

ALL that was what i said to David.

David’s response was, “I think that was the guy’s ultimate goal and turn on. He knew he could elicit rage.”

And he added, “But they do have cute tits.” And i agree. They do. Lol.

Use the belt

David hasn’t used the belt on me but one time ever. It was quite a long time ago now too.

He didn’t feel much in control of it or where it landed. So he quickly came to prefer the paddle, and now lately seems to prefer the whip.

i think when he used the belt before, we were too new to this and it scared him about the (possible) unintentional damage he might cause. But now, we aren’t new. Now he might could rather enjoy using a belt.

Using a belt would be a good fix for a vacation spanking implement as it’s rather easy to pack! Of course, possibly not very quiet. But then again, much of the noise may be more about MY sounds rather than the belt sounds too. Maybe i could manage to be quiet and it wouldn’t be heard though too… like Brown Headed girl as she’s quite silent!

i kind of hope he does use it again sometime soon. i would rather like to feel how it’s similar or different than the paddle or the cane or the whip. But then again, maybe i wouldn’t….. let’s face it, they ALL hurt!

But it’s not about my pain but rather his power…. Just like Rich guy said. Or maybe not his power, but definitely his control. When i submit like that, i am absolutely giving up all control! Willingly.

Tonight

David is NOT spanking me.. easy or hard, with or without a belt. But i actually think i should be spanked.

i haven’t been very good lately. Of course, i think some of the reason i have not been spanked is that i had that ear infection and wasn’t feeling well. i am finally over that though too.

So after i nearly caused a fight with David yesterday, then rubbed myself to orgasm, all while NOT being spanked…. i decided at a minimum i needed to be reminded of that control and power and authority… and to submit to it…..

So that’s why i am voluntarily wearing my CB tonight. Just like i said in my message to David above.

He didn’t comment when i put it on. i don’t know if he didn’t comment as it was expected, it happened, and therefore, nothing noteworthy to discuss. Most likely that’s the case, but maybe not. i didn’t ask, as that seemed self serving and arrogant…. “What do you think? Why didn’t you comment?”…. Didn’t seem altogether appropriate.

A few things i know for sure

Is that i am not the one who will ever be holding the belt.

David will never spank me in rage.

Wearing my chastity belt is another sign of authority that is exercised over me.

i won’t be orgasming tonight.

i submit willingly.

i get juicy when watching spanking … and power exchange… scenes.

i wonder if the prostitutes will have a three-peat.

My Sir holds the power, and i like it that way.

And my life is good!

Hugs,

Marie

305 – Happy Fat Tuesday

Written by Marie on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 305 – Happy Fat Tuesday

Today is Tuesday. i really hate Tuesdays.

To be specific though, this is a special Tuesday. Today is FAT TUESDAY. Of ALL Tuesdays, this may be the only one of the year i at least try to find joy. It’s a party day, or at least it’s supposed to be.

But i hate Tuesdays.

Most people hate Mondays … but not me. i hate Tuesdays. Because, as a boss, most of what causes the average person to hate Monday is dealt with by my staff and by Tuesday the reality of their Monday problems that they weren’t able to fix (the “big ones”) become my problem by Tuesday.

To make that even more amplified today, i should tell you that last week i was having problems with my right ear. It felt like i was underwater, which caused pressure and hearing loss. So on Friday, i went to the Doc who said no infection, no excessive ear wax… and well… no obvious reason for the problem.

So the Doc opted to put me on a steroid pack, where you take like 8-pills on Day 1, 6 pills on Day 2, and step down to nothing by the end of Day 5. He said, “maybe your body needs a bit of a boost and can knock out whatever this is on your own with a little help.” And while i agreed and today is now Day 4 of the pack, i cringed at the time it was suggested.

i HATE steroid packs. They make me super hungry (i always gain weight as a result), can’t sleep (i have had 4-5 hours sleep average these last few days), and irritable (not sure if it’s the sleep loss or the drugs or both).

All culminating on my least favorite day of the week. Tuesday.

Mardi Gras Fat Tuesday

David is originally from Louisiana and Mardi Gras is a huge big deal there. While most of the country takes extended Spring Break holidays from schools, the State of Louisiana chooses to celebrate Mardi Gras by (nearly) shutting down all school and work for the week and instead choosing to party.

While we don’t live in Louisiana, we live near it and with David in my house, we frequently have a small spirited celebration with a King Cake at a minimum. (Of course, it IS a Tuesday and we work, so we don’t celebrate as much as we would otherwise.)

Today through Thursday, David has to be out of town so i will be on my own which is probably good because i have had a downright cranky and snappy attitude with him. He knows it’s (mostly) the drugs talking, so he’s been more lenient than usual and just given me a few verbal warnings and “the look” rather than discipline.

i am honestly unsure if the grace he’s granted is good or bad though.

Good for the obvious reasons… he knows it’s not truly “the full Marie” talking.

Bad because… well…. With or without the drugs, being disrespectful is… disrespectful. Maybe a good spanking would keep me more in check, with or without steroids.

Even if i asked, i doubt David will spank me though because it is a party day! As well, i also think David thinks it’s not the right way for him to act when i am (effectively) sick. He probably also thinks a spanking would not fix the problem as i am not fully in control of myself, which he would most likely be correct there too.

The good news is, my ear problem seems to have dissipated, at least for now anyway. i won’t lie though, i am admittedly concerned whether this steroid pack (and my body) has knocked out the problem or just postponed it. Time will tell.

We partied last Thursday already

At the end of last Thursday after i wrote about my attitude problem then and as we were getting ready for bed, David looked at me and in a playful tone asked, “So.. you going to take that belt off or what?”

Very solemnly and with the most uneventful facial expression ever i said, “THAT is not up to me Sir.”

He broke into a sly smile and said, “Then take it off!”

He didn’t have to say anymore as i knew the next part was that he would play with me, to his preferences, and it would culminate in my very desirable and explosive orgasm.

It did. (Woo hoo!)

i was actually surprised though. As i wrote, i expected the attitude would have to change before the orgasm would flow. David said that was what his original intent was, but he decided to take a different path. One i was happy to walk down!

Maintenance works!

Friday did have a big maintenance spanking, as i also anticipated. He used the cane. He rarely uses the cane, so a few smacks with that and my ass was red and my butt was stinging fiercely. i was ready to beg for it to stop just at the point right when it did.

My butt was pretty tender for all of Friday, which was definitely enough to keep me in check all weekend for sure!

Maintenance spankings aren’t quite as intense as discipline spankings, but, they are still a stark reminder of who i am, the behavior that is expected, how i am to act, and that this submissive behavior is what i want too. And i really (really!) do!

While my weekend was uneventful really… as the ear problems disintegrated to nothing, the steroids worked in exact opposition, bringing me to this climatic day where i have an even more amplified “i hate Tuesdays” attitude.

Maybe before i head to work this morning and David to the airport, i should ask for a discipline spanking…. Or at least a maintenance one…. Or maybe i need to just “go to work already!”

Maybe i need to forget about this whole week’s bad attitude by allowing David’s grace to just sink in and be thankful instead.

Overall…..i feel squirrely and indecisive. Ugh! One thing i rarely am is indecisive. i regularly know what i want and how to get it, i just frequently lack confidence to go after it and end up over analyzing it. But right now, i feel truly indecisive. (It’s the drugs talking, right?!)

Extended belt time is needed

Too bad the rear opening to my belt has stillllll not arrived (that’s annoying me too!), as i could use with an extended stay in the belt while David is out of town this week. Anytime i have extended Belt time, it accentuates the lack of my control and in the short term is annoying but ultimately ends up with my acceptance and a calming feeling. And “calm” is definitely NOT where i am right now.

But for today.. it’s Tuesday.

Tuesday…. Go away already. Including a Fat one. Today.. i just don’t feel like celebrating anything .. fat or otherwise.

The only “fat” i am feeling is the physical kind. After eating too much this week from steroid overload, i am sure i have gained a few lbs and that just adds to the crankiness too!

With David out of town, we won’t be doing a cake or any other party, and i won’t lie, THAT brings me a bit of joy.

Drugs and stress and annoyance and displeasure and bad behavior and .. and … and…. All just go away … right along with Tuesday too.

Hugs,

Marie

300 The Five A’s of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Written by Marie on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 300 The Five A’s of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

So the word “RESPECT” (and DISrespect!) has been on my mind nonstop since i read the blog post about it and mentioned it to you before too.

There is so much in that one word i can’t even quite organize my thoughts or know what i want to say, but i am going to try to do it justice! (Which is why i have worked on this post for ages now and haven’t actually produced anything for you to read. Hopefully that ends here.)

The definition …. “Respect”

The word respect comes from the Latin respectus which means ‘attention’ or ‘consideration’.

RESPECT can be a noun or a verb.

As a noun, it is a deep feeling of admiration for someone, elicited by their abilities, characteristics, or achievements.

As a verb, it is to actively admire someone deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements.

i would argue that anyone in a relationship should actively RESPECT and find ways to show it toward your spouse so that your spouse KNOWS you respect them!

In thinking about respect for my husband, i would say it should be used as a verb. i want to ACTIVELY respect David. He deserves it for his abilities, AND qualities, AND achievements. But also because he is the head of our household… and that includes Me!

Recently i heard David say to me, “That was very disrespectful. Wasn’t it?”

And i had to agree.

He had previously asked me to carry the car keys in my purse, and just before being told i was acting disrespectful, he had asked me if i still had the keys. And i answered, “yes… you put them in my purse before…..”. And when i spoke, i had a “don’t you remember??” Or maybe even a “duh!” kind of tone about my response, not to mention i probably had a matching look on my face.

He was not thrilled, and i didn’t blame him.

Of course, i did not do any of this on purpose, or maybe i subconsciously did.

That’s where the ACTIVE part of RESPECT starts too. If i did this intentionally, it was not consciously. i was not aware of my actions until it was too late. And sometimes that’s the problem. i need to be more conscious about my words and tone

The words and tone matter

i googled, “how to show respect” and a bajillion sites came up. i clicked on a handful just to see what someone else thought this might entail. Most of the sites were fairly consistent and the #1 thing that seemed to be constantly repeated all revolved around the use of our words.

Some examples include….

  • Say please and thank you,
  • Praise him in front of others,
  • Apologize when you are wrong,
  • Compliment him,
  • Let him know he matters.

i could keep going, but you see the pattern. Use your words wisely. And with intentionality.

The age old childhood words, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” is so NOT true. Okay, the first part is true, but the second part is worse than the first part!

Words are permanent. Once they are out there, they can’t be taken back. While the sticks and stones do indeed cause broken bones, they heal. Sometimes the hurt from harmful words never heal.

Use your words wisely!

For David, most of my respect definitely comes in the use of my words, especially the word “Sir.”

This is even more true when he’s asked me a direct question where the answer is a simple yes or no, my answer should be followed by “Sir.” For example, “Did you sleep well?” My response should be, “Yes [or no] Sir.” My answer should absolutely NOT just be a “yes.”

To even take it a bit further, he would never want to hear, “yeah” or “uh huh,” or some other similar version of the word “yes.” The same goes for the word “no,” where alternative words are not acceptable. It should be a “yes (or no) Sir.” He doesn’t like alternative words as they seem lazy, which is also another form of disrespect.

So without the right words and intentional use of them, i am lazy and disrespectful in David’s eyes. And while i do agree, even if i did not, my opinion is really irrelevant because how he feels about it is what ultimately matters. And to accept that he doesn’t like it, and to avoid using words that he doesn’t like (and use one’s he does like), is actively showing respect.

There are other ways to show RESPECT that include …..

  • Spend time with him,
  • Spontaneously touch him,
  • Smile at him with love,
  • Let him be a leader,
  • Ask him for advice.

Did you notice that NONE of these things require spending of money? Oh, a gift is also another way to show respect too, but it isn’t required.

Money is not necessary or required in order to show RESPECT towards someone. Respect is an action, much like walking or running or breathing.

If showing respect isn’t a nature part of your day, then maybe add it to an your to-do list today to build it into your daily routine and to be intentional about it.

Maybe your (or my) To-do List should look something like …..

  • Go to the store,
  • Clean the bedroom,
  • wash clothes,
  • SHOW RESPECT TO MY HUSBAND.

But then it shouldn’t be LAST on the list either because let’s face it, the most important to-do items are always the first ones listed or the ones we tackle first.

If “show respect” is last, it may not get done. We don’t always get the entire list checked off. You may not intentionally let him know he matters, you care, you love, and you RESPECT him if you don’t get to the bottom of the list if that’s where this to-do resides.

Make your spouse a priority and make “show RESPECT” be the first to-do that you do today!

Because when you fail to RESPECT him, now you’ve DISRESPECTED him.

(i have another part-done post on another idea relating to respect. Hopefully i will get it finished soon… stay tuned!)

Hugs,

Marie

293 – Submission and Belt Rules

Written by Marie on . Posted in My Dominant Sir. 4 Comments on 293 – Submission and Belt Rules

We are not ones who are super big on D/s contracts, writing down the rules, or otherwise posting them. That said, i do have rules and we do have process/procedures. We just didn’t ever take time to sit and write it all down to make it official/formal.

Recently i was surfing the internet and came across a site (www.BeltedGirls.com) where i found a set of rules that a belted girl, along with her husband, documented for her “Submission & Belt Rules.”

i rather love her rules and it seems to say everything that i would, if i were to put into writing my “rules.”

Here are the Submission and Belt Rules:

i rather liked these rules so much that i showed it to David. Sir’s response was, “Sounds about spot on.”

We didn’t talk much more about it really, but i think when i adjust to the new permanent/ more durable belt, these rules will become our rules too.

1. The belt can come off when exercising.
2. Husband will hold the key.
3. Husband controls when I’m going to orgasm
4. Husband controls when the belt comes off and I will not expect penetration just because its off
5. The belt will keep me from masturbating when he is away or I am away from him.
6. To receive pleasure (his cock) then I must earn it.
7. I will be ready to please him whenever, however and as often as he desires, with or without the belt on.
8. I will not beg him to remove the belt but will learn that it is a privilege to have it off.
9. I will not reach orgasm unless I have explicit permission from my husband.
10. I must tell my husband if I have an orgasm without his permission. This is disrespectful to him. Always.
11. I will never fondle myself or use toys in any manner unless he tells me to or gives explicit approval to do so.
12. My husband’s job is to make sure that I am shaven to his liking. If not, then he will be allowed to shave me, if he wishes to do so, and discipline me accordingly.
13. Each week I will receive maintenance spankings out of love as a reminder that he is in control, which may or may not occur with the belt on.
14. Breaking any of these rules results in punishment.

There are a few alterations that i/we would make to a few of these rules, as follows:

#4 – While the essence of this is absolutely spot on, i’d maybe make the first part more emphasized. Husband is ALWAYS in control of when the belt is on or off.

#5 – i’d rephrase this to simply say, “The belt will keep me from masturbating.” Period. The end. Delete the entire last part of that because whether it is on, with or without him present, it will keep me from masturbating. Always. (And it definitely does that!)

#6 – i would make a slight addition to have this read “To receive pleasure (his cock) and be allowed to orgasm i must earn it.”

Those are all slight adjustments and, even without those changes, the essence is still spot on!

But the one rule that hit me and sunk in the most was #8….

8. I will not beg him to remove the belt but will learn that it is a privilege to have it off.

With just my experiences of continuous wear to date, this has already become one of the hardest for me to adhere to. So it stands to reason, that with continuous/ long term wear with the permanent (more durable) belt, i will likely always struggle with this one rule over all the others!

i have told David i intend to expand the “will not beg” part to read more like, “i will not beg for the Belt to be removed unless i can prove or show why it is completely necessary.” That may be what the original author intended as well, but it wasn’t entirely clear.

The beg part is truly what i have already failed miserably at. When i have the CB off, i find i yearn to have it on and vice versa too! And when it’s on, i talk about it ALL the time… asking David “ready to give me the key??” ….To allow me to take it off. Honestly it gets to the point of annoying for us both! i admit that it even annoys me, even though i can’t seem to resist (and my will power fails).

So i have now told David that i think i need to change that behavior. When it goes on, it stays on until David decides to have it taken off. Period. The end.

He knows it’s on when it’s on. In fact, he ordered it on! He won’t forget.

And even “if” he were to forget, when we are apart, when we are back again together he will know as he will see it. When we sleep, i am always naked except when the belt is on. And he will see it. And even “if” he were to forget, …. Well… i know he won’t. So that “if” by some strange happenstance, odd, and truly not likely situation, he has forgotten – he will instantly be reminded.

That means there is NO reason to talk about it, remind him, or beg for it to otherwise be taken off.

That brings us to that last part about how i will not beg for it to come off…. “unless i can prove or show why it is completely necessary.” means is that the belt has to come off for a particular and unavoidable, probably an emergency, situation.

Maybe one example of it being “completely necessary,” example, would be a belt malfunction. Maybe a screw comes lose and needs to be retightened. Or maybe a screw comes out altogether and without reattaching it, the Belt could fall apart and/or fall off.

Another possibility might be if it is ill-fitting. Maybe the belt pinches, binds, or otherwise causes an injured spot to appear on my skin. This is a real possibility but once i get the settings correct for band width or length, and the tightness adjustments made, this is not too likely. Yet it is possible for sure.

Another example would be if/when i go through a security screening machine. One looking for metal. Obviously the machine is looking to find guns and knives or other similar weapons, and clearly NOT looking to find a chastity belt (!!). Can you imagine what an awkward situation that would be?! Of course, this isn’t likely to happen as an “emergency situation” though either. We will likely always know ahead of time and plan accordingly.

So honestly, there aren’t many reasons to have to cause me to EVER have to beg for it off.

So WHY then do i sometimes do just that… beg for it to be off?!

Good question!

After the new belt arrived (and we figured out the lock did fit albeit a bit differently than we expected… another post!) the belt went on.

It went on about 5’ish pm on Friday evening, and it is now Sunday morning. It has been about 36-hours now, with no clear or obvious-to-me end in sight.

And while it does not hurt, pinch, or have any other belt malfunction reason for me to have a legit reason to BEG TO HAVE IT OFF, i already (sort of) did just that.

Are you asking, “how do you sort of beg?” Yah, so, i knew i wasn’t supposed to beg. But i wanted to ask for it off too.

i knew he’d ask, “why?” As in “for what legit reason are you asking?”. i also knew i didn’t have a reason. In fact, when i asked myself that question, the only real answer i could think of was because i am not used to wearing it as of late …..AND…. because i wanted to.

i wanted to ask to have it off because i didn’t like the “game” anymore. i wanted to take back the control of my own sex and my own body. Saying it another way, i wanted to be selfish and NOT be submissive at least in this small way.

So i was hanging around David yesterday morning (after 12-hours of wear) a bit longer than usual, trying to think up a good way to ask (but not beg), when he noticed. He even told ME, “you want the belt off, don’t you?”

“Yes Sir.”

“Why?” < – see, i told you!

i told him all of what i told you above. It didn’t fly. He said, “uh, yeah. So the answer is no. You don’t need to have that control. You just want it. And I’m saying no.”

Then again after lunch (18-hours of wear), David asked me, “how you doing?” Since our son is home for the Christmas break, i assumed David was speaking in code. i responded with, “Yes. Overall. But i wouldn’t mind if it came off.”

He said, “I said no. I meant no. I only asked since it’s a new belt and wanted to be sure you were ok.”

Well….. so… the keys to the lock are sitting on the bathroom counter, and i said, “i could just use the keys, you know.”

And his immediate response was, “And I could just use the crop too… You Know!”

i paused a second and said, “and then i suppose the belt will just go right back on too.”

While he didn’t even much respond to that comment (as i believe he took it to be rhetorical in nature), he did say, “We’ve spent enough money on this, and waited long enough for its delivery, that you should know….you WILL be wearing it! Get used to it!”

The way he said it, i wondered if he had an exact plan. So i inquired. His words came back to me with, “No, I don’t have a full plan. But it will come together soon. What I know for sure is this is going to end up being your new normal.”

Sucking cock while in belt

THEN after dinner (24-hours of continuous wear), i was sitting on the couch watching tv with him. i grabbed up his arm and wrapped it around my shoulders, like you would a nice warm blanket, just to be wrapped up in “him.”

He didn’t just let his arm rest on my shoulder though. He then pressed downward, causing my face to be guided to his crotch. His pants were still on and he laughed saying, “oops. How did that happen?”

i looked up at him and smiled. And pulled his zipper down and started sucking his cock hard. After some time of that, he pulled me back and asked, “how was that? Want out of your belt now?!”

i said, “Yes Sir, i do. i want to have the belt off, be allowed to sit down on and ride your hard cock… to be able to take advantage of what i just created.”

He slapped a butt cheek and said, “No. Not tonight. But this was good, thank you!” As he zipped his pants back, he laughed more. Then added, “now let’s watch the rest of our tv show together.” i felt my puss dripping juices into the dome shield that covered her.

New normal

i suspect i will now find my life to be more time IN belt than OUT. And that’s probably a good thing, but will require a fundamental mindset change that i will have to adjust to too.

Why will it be a good thing?

Because it forces me to submit in a very tangible and physical way. Sometimes i need to be reminded and reinforced who i submit to and why.

Like in the spirit of Rule #9 & #10 above, when i masturbate and/or orgasm without David present (or at his directive), it is disrespectful and selfish too.

When i do these things, i also become less agreeable to wanting to engage in sexual activities with him. i usually then have an “i already did that” attitude and a “i’m not interested now,” way too. None of which is how a married woman should act with her husband. Ever!

So being reminded to NOT be selfish, to NOT do sexual things by myself or to myself (without him present and telling me it is allowed), and to be under David’s authority is a better way of life.

i just have to change my mindset about wearing the belt. i have to learn to love the belt ON. And i know i truly will!

So. The belt is currently still on.

And i don’t know when it’s coming off. But i will work to NOT BEG at all. And to accept that THIS is good for me, and that i NEED to NOT be in control, and acknowledge in all ways i WANT David in control.

And i will PRAY he wants to finger, lick, fuck, or all of the above (!) at least one of my holes soon!

(i will do a full review of the new belt soon. Still creating thoughts and forming opinions about it.)

Hugs,

Marie

291 – My Toy or Your Tool

Written by Marie on . Posted in My Dominant Sir. No Comments on 291 – My Toy or Your Tool

i did it. i made David mad today. i didn’t mean to. It just happened.

He was out of town for 24-hours .. yesterday left, home today. This morning he texted me good morning and i reciprocated. Then he asked me if i was excited about my “new toy” arriving today.

i got an email yesterday that FINALLY the new chastity belt was to be delivered today. i ordered it on July 10, and finally on December 15 it was to arrive. FIVE months in the making, Their website says “due to COVID supply chain issues, please allow 1-3 months for delivery.” And today was the day it FiNaLlY was scheduled to arrive.

Well. i was excited…..But not to have a “new toy” arrive. i felt like he was insulting me, or making fun of me, or something like that.

i suddenly thought, “this is all just a big game to him. And when he’s tired of playing it, he gets lax. And when he wants to play again, he goes 100% all in.”

And, in my own mind at least, it suddenly made sense to me that he doesn’t LIKE this dynamic and (probably) only does it to make me happy and satisfy my needs. While i should be happy he wants to please me and make me happy, at least some of the time, it makes me UNhappy to think he ONLY does it (“it” being Dominant) to make ME happy.

Suddenly i couldn’t decide if i was sad, hurt, mad, confused, or what! Maybe hurt is best. i couldn’t believe i have been so stupid for so long now and not known or realized he thinks this is all just one big game.

So.

i asked him. About how serious he is about our dynamic.

But.

Not quite that simple either. If it had been, i probably wouldn’t have made him mad.

What i wrote was…..

I guess it may be a “toy” but I think of it as more than that. I think of it as a better way of life and marriage. I think the same about the paddle, cane, and crop. And even my collars.

And i then also wrote…..

I think if you thought of them as your tool(s), instead of my toys(s), things would be that much better.

THAT was when he responded back.

“Fuck you.”

Ahh crap. This isn’t how i should have done this at all.

And i immediately apologized. But. The damage was done.

i genuinely didn’t mean to cause a fight. i thought by leading with “I think” it would be how I THINK. But he took it as, “you should think” which was me telling him what to think or what to do.

That’s when i said…

I genuinely did NOT Intend to make you mad. I was very shocked to see your response. I’m sorry.

If you don’t like being Dominant, or using my toys, then just tell me so. That’s understandable. I just get confused when sometimes you are and sometimes you aren’t, and I just don’t know.

I’m sorry.

To which he didn’t respond for several hours. And when he did, there was nothing about any of this. That moment, along with the anger and any other emotion, had passed. It was as if it never happened at all.

When i got home, i found the package on my bed. i had actually forgotten about the delivery until I saw it.

i opened it up and was excited to see if it fit. And i found the lock on it is really not the right size. It’s hard to explain, but it’s a bit too tight and NOT easy to get on/off.

i decided to try to figure it out while the CB is NOT on my body and therefore not quite as hard to sort out. But then it was time for dinner and our son just got home from college today too, so i let it be. T

hat was when David asked me, “do you have it on?” And i said no, of course.

When he asked me why, i said, “because i can’t figure out the lock,” which confused him. After i showed him how it was not fitting on the belt very well, he tried it himself and agreed it wasn’t working well.

We let it go and we all went out to eat. In addition, David/i drank a bottle of wine. We enjoyed seeing our son and eating/drinking good together as a family again.

When we got home, David became determined that he would figure out the lock. He did research and found that it is a slight bit incorrectly sized and David ordered a new one on Amazon that (hopefully) will be better.

Then after he finished that, he comes in to me and says, “Don’t tell me I’m not serious about this (dynamic and being dominant) when I come home after relaxing and enjoying good wine to then spend nearly an hour researching how to get the right lock!”

So it wasn’t 100% forgotten from this morning like i had assumed.

Now i also think i exaggerated the whole situation from the morning in my head. i got myself in a tizzy for no reason, and provoked my Sir for another no good reason. over my assumption that “my toy” was a game.

i think maintaining 100% consistency about anything in life is difficult and hard to sustain. Maybe a “break” is good (for anything ) sometimes. It’s what you do after the break that matters.

Like if you work out 7-days a week, you’ll eventually burn out. You need a break, as long as you get back out there and go to it again. Same thing with a diet. You can’t live on a diet, but you can give yourself a pass sometimes to eat the dessert (or the glass of wine) and enjoy it.

So maybe David needs a break sometimes. i may well need a break sometimes too actually.

And maybe he didn’t think of the new CB as “my toy” at all. Maybe he was just messing with me and texting that way to be fun and cut up. Who knows! What i do know is that he’s right… if he didn’t care or want to use “my toys” as “his tools” he wouldn’t have spent an hour figuring out the lock!

Maybe in his toolbox is a lot of physical “tools” but maybe some ones that are mental too. Maybe i need to get out of my own head already.

Won’t lie though,., i’m hoping (praying really!) that tomorrow…. a Friday… that we have maintenance. It could do a lot of good if David were to use the Tool (aka: paddle) on my bottom.

Hugs,

Marie