DAY 19: LIFE CHANGING…Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life? If so, what are they?
This is going to sound crazy, but our sex life is 1,000% better than it was before we implemented our D/s, DD relationship.
We simply had grown boring and basically stopped having sex. i’d tell David we were roommates with the same last name.
Now… we have some sort of sexual-activity pretty much daily. It may be as little as a text (or “sext”!) or as much as the full blown intercourse. But no matter, the sexual energy is alive and well again. And it was dead and gone before.
i think this may be in part because my submission to David has built up his ego and confidence, and the respect he deserved. So by me giving him that mental boost, it has become a huge turn on … for us both!
And while my goal at the onset and what i hoped for with this dynamic was for us to fight less, it has actually become more than that even! Besides less fighting and more sex, it also improved our communications too.
David no longer says things like, “I think maybe you should consider blah, blah, blah.” I always found all those qualifiers to just be confusing. Does that mean i definitely should or that you definitely think i might should or that you might think i definitely should?? Even that sentence is confusing! Right?
While those sentences do sometimes still happen, more often than not now, he says, “you need to xyz” or just “go do xyz” works too. Much more direct and straightforward. And when those confusing sentences come, now i just say, “i’m unclear about your intention Sir. Can you speak more directly please?”
So our conversations are more direct. And ultimately more clear.
So yes, there’s been several improvements in our marriage that while on this side it seems obvious (a “duh” moment), i didn’t necessarily expect many of these things at the outset either.
What changed in your world by implementing the dynamic you have?