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52 – Panties be G-O-N-E

Written by Marie on . Posted in Marriage, Submission, Uncategorized. No Comments on 52 – Panties be G-O-N-E

The rule is simple: N-O P-A-N-T-I-E-S.

At all.

Ever.

Not hard to follow… right?

Well…… as i mentioned in the last post, i don’t like the “rub” when i wear jeans withOUT panties.

So …..today, i cheated. i wore a G-string. It was a compromise.. they aren’t “really” panties.. i mean they are only “half” there anyway! (right?)

i was honest. Told the truth. i told David straight away. Well, mostly anyway. Ok, ok…so i texted it to him AFTER i left the house for work. i know……NOT my best move.

And i suppose that wouldn’t have been a terrible thing…. had it been the first time. But it wasn’t.

So before you start in on me too….let me just say… i have told David every-single-time i cheated. And he said, “you better stop.” And “you WILL regret this” and other similar statements. But that was really all that happened. So i kinda thought he didn’t reallyyyyyyy mind after all. Besides, i have taken them off as soon as i got home.

But today, he said, “we will deal with this when you are home.” Which pretty much told me that today was going to be different.

And when i got home, i was admittedly…. nervous. i kinda thought today just may be the day that i pushes it too far. And sure enough…

i came into my bedroom to change out of work clothes and take off my shoes, and my panties drawers – yes i have TWO – were pulled out.

And they were empty.

GONE. PANTIES WERE GONE.

The drawers are completely empty.

When i saw David, he very calmly but sternly said, “No more! I told you before that your pussy is NOT to be covered and because you can’t be trusted to follow the rule, I’ve now made it where you won’t be tempted. And i won’t be touching it tonight because you are now being disciplined.”

When i asked what happened to them …if he threw the panties away or just hid them somewhere, he said, “it doesn’t matter as they don’t belong to you anymore so don’t worry about it!”

i wish I could tell you i didn’t deserve this. But i do.

i guess in some ways, i’m happy they are gone as i was indeed tempted and, obviously, failed. Now, it won’t be an option. So for that, i am indeed happy.

But i got to say…. they will be missed….. 😏

Hugs, Marie

PS…i know i still owe you a post about my convo with our son. Not forgotten.

51 – Bras, Panties, and Corsets – oh my.

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After the last update about a chastity belt, i was thinking of other posts that i put something out there and talked about it, but haven’t talked (much) since… and i thought of the braless movement, the no-panties rule, and the corset training.

i will start with the CORSET. While i love the way it feels and makes my waist look small, David didn’t really like the way it smashed up the top of my back. He said it made me look like a hunchback. When it is on, after you cinch up the middle, the top and the bottom tend to be bigger. And unfortunately, the top got bigger in front AND in back. So facing me, he liked what he saw, but when he’s behind me, he hated the way that looked.

So the corset training has gone by the wayside. And that’s okay, as getting in/ out of it was quite a hassle and took time. Not to mention it was somewhat hard to hide under certain clothing, which tended to make me wear big/ baggy/ bulky clothing, to which David is NOT a fan of. So there’s that…. but now we know!

i still have the corsets… if we go to a club, one that is sexually oriented, or a house-party, i may break it out and wear it … without anything else on. (oh la la!) But i’m not too sure that will happen anytime soon!

And then there’s the BRALESS MOVEMENT. THIS is still a thing. David has always loved my large breasts and he takes every opportunity to squeeze my nipples. So being braless makes that super easy and accessible to him.

i was struggling though with work. i own my own business and work with a lot of very conservative clients, who wouldn’t take kindly to seeing erect nipples in a business meeting. So we have compromised in that the no- bra rule is applicable 100% of the time that we are together, and optional otherwise. Meaning, i can wear a bra to work, which is super nice. But there is still an implicit understanding that if i wear clothing that a bra isn’t needed, then a bra isn’t worn. And.. when a bra is worn, it is to be off by the time i get into the house. So it comes off in the car quite frequently.

i have to say while i wasn’t too sure about this when it first started, i love being braless now! In fact, Monday’s reallyyyyy suck now after an entire weekend of being free and having to bind myself up in that bra again.

And then there is the no-Panties rule. David first said only G-Strings, but when i complained they weren’t comfortable he said, “fine. No Panties. Easy access that way”.

So this is still a thing. And mostly, i am good with it. There’s a couple of times that it doesn’t work well for me, which is: 1) wearing blue jeans. Wow, they are form fitting and rub in ALL the wrong places. It tends to cause me to feel carpet burn by the days end. David said, “that’s easily fixed… don’t wear jeans.” And 2) when David tells me to wear a butt plug. Panties or G-strings help to hold it in. And now, not so much support. David says there’s an easy fix for this too… “wear the jeans that rub tight.”

Oh my.

So we keep evolving and finding what works and what doesn’t and I’m ok with that. It feels good to make him happy and to know he loves me always.

Tomorrow i am going to tell you about the convo that David, myself, and our 15-year old son had over dinner..about straight, gay, homosexual, bisexual, pan sexual, and A-sexual people. It was interesting to say the least.

Hugs,

Marie

49 – My Valentine maintenance session

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Maintenance spankings really suck. In the moment anyway.

i asked for maintenance when we first started this lifestyle to ensure we stick to this Domestic Discipline lifestyle. i am committed and want to do this lifestyle…forever…. and in my sane, very-sober moments maintenance sounds really good.

We have maintenance every Friday. Without fail. Rain or shine. And we N-E-V-E-R miss. If for some reason…. apart from one another for (say) a work trip, illness, or guests in our home…. we do it on the first available and possible “make-up” day.

And today was no different. My butt is red and throbbing as i type this.

And Sir just asked me if i wanted session number 2 for the day! I declined. He smiled. He then said he loved me and Happy Valentine’s Day.

So for someone reading this thinking, “WHY would you submit to being spanked every-single-Friday?”…. i will tell you why….

It is a way to bond, connect with each other, spend quality time together, build up who we want to be together now and always, and ultimately… instill, and reinforce, that i am submissive and he is Dominant.

i yield to him my entire being, including my butt. It is an active choice. NOT something done to me against my will, but something i want to allow and encourage him to do. By encouraging David to spank me with my willingness and acceptance, it gives him the confidence that if i will submit now to this, when he makes other decisions for our family, i will also submit then too. …

And for the record, i am NEVER restrained and have every opportunity to resist or fight it, but i don’t. When i submit, he is rewarded with confidence and pride instilled in his mind that i yield all authority to him to run our marriage and family, and yes, that happens when i submit my physical body for a maintenance spanking.

So a maintenance spanking is more than just a spanking. It is a bonding experience, and a way of life for us.

But today, on Valentine’s Day, i wasn’t in the mood for it. In fact, i tried to talk David out of it. i said it’s Valentine’s, it won’t hurt if we skip one week, i have been really good…. and his response was, “NO. We will not skip even once because once turns into twice and three times and eventually never. And then we don’t live the lifestyle we both have committed to. So get over here and pull your pants down and get into position “

So… i did.

But in the moment… as that paddle is swinging and stinging my ass….it’s not very “good” at ALL. Despite wanting to live this lifestyle and having been the one to say i wanted these maintenance sessions, it’s definitely NOT good! No… it just plain hurts. And of course, that’s by design. And it’s effective. It grounds me. It reminds me who i am alone and who we are together.

And in the moment, i literally hold my breathe, waiting for the paddle to leave it’s mark, and i pray… yes pray. Oh i don’t pray what you might think i’d be praying at that moment… (Lord let this stop soon) but rather more something like this, “Lord bless our marriage. Bless David. Help me to be completely submissive. Help him to know i yield and accept the authority that you’ve given him to be the leader of our house. Help me to accept this spanking with grace and mercy.”

The longer the Spanking, the more difficult it is to stay focused on my prayers because… well…. it hurts. And i am being spanked.

Tonight, it was extra hard. To focus and the paddling. And i know that David knew this too because he asked me, “are you close to calling yellow?” He probably wanted it to be extra hard tonight, for some reason that he had and to which really didn’t matter. And i had to say “yes” and he just said, “yes…what?” i said, “yes Sir.”

So i probably needed a spanking… i have been sassy and forgetting to say Sir lately… obviously…..so… it did what it was supposed to… it reinforced that i am NOT in charge and i was reminded of that tonight.

Hugs, Marie

48 – Just Keep it To Yourself

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Sometimes Submission is just a matter of keeping it to yourself. And sometimes that’s easy… but not always.

Here’s a few examples of what’s been in my head lately when i submit… or try to anyway.

David decided there were a few shirts in his closet that had seen better days and said “I think it’s time to get rid of these.” And he took them off the hanger and made a pile on the floor. It’s just three shirts. So not a big deal. But now it’s just sitting there. And i really want to say “are you going to throw those away? Can I do it for you?”

But i haven’t. On purpose. Because i know that it will come out with a tone that will NOT be appropriate. So i let it sit.

In the end, i ask myself “Does it matter if that pile sits there? Indefinitely?” Probably not. While it does create unnecessary clutter, it isn’t hurting anything or anyone.

So … keep your mouth shut. Simple Submission.

Another example… we were headed out to dinner and he told me to drive. Now in 23-years of being together, he has NEVER told me to drive and i can count on one hand the number of times i have driven when he’s in the car, which is typically been a result of him being ill. i started to ask why. But decided to keep my mouth shut instead.

Again, was it hurting anyone? Anything? Well… you might say that by keeping my mouth shut, it actually benefited me because David drives VERY aggressively and i do not care for it at all. It is the single biggest reason we have gotten into fights over our entire relationship. So now… while it seems strange behavior on his part, does it really matter “why”?! NOPE!

So sometimes… all it takes it staying quiet to be submissive!

But sometimes… staying quiet isn’t an option. This morning was one of those times.

i was cleaning. And i threw away 3 things that “technically” belonged to him, but none of which i thought he cared about. One was a magazine that came in the mail and has sat on the kitchen counter for almost 3-weeks. (Who has time to read magazines anyway? In the bathroom maybe… but then move it there and read it already. )

Well, he saw these things and got mad. He yelled at me, “DO NOT THROW AWAY ANYTHING OF MINE EVER AGAIN WITHOUT ASKING! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?”

i responded with “Yes Sir”…. but i admit, it had a bittttttt of attitude. To which i thought i’d get my butt blistered, but did not.

Instead, he said, “what are you thinking?”

Ahh crap!

Ok, so i was super sassy in my head at that moment and had been thinking “ok, careful what you ask for! i literally won’t throw away a thing of yours… like when i clean dishes and you have left over uneaten food on your plate… nope! Ain’t throwing it away!” But i KNEW that these thoughts shouldn’t come out of my mouth!!

So at this moment i am in a quandary.

He asked a direct question to which i have to answer. But if i lie, he’d probably know (because i don’t lie well and we’ve been together so long he would just “know”) and if i tell the truth, it is clearly NOT submissive!

So… i punted. i said, “i would prefer not to answer because it isn’t submissive thoughts and if i tell you, it will get me in trouble. But i was trying to overcome my non-submissiveness by not speaking my thoughts aloud.”

It didn’t work. He demanded to know. So…. i told him.

He wasn’t happy.

And what do you think came next????

(In my defense… i think it is unfair to put your submissive into a no-win situation when she acknowledges it ahead of time and warns you about it too. But i suppose the thoughts themselves were not submissive as i should’ve been thinking about how “he is right” and i should probably work on being submissive in all ways…. even in my head!)

Let me know your thoughts…..

Hugs!

Marie

45 – New and Old Rules.

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After David and i talked a LOT, we started talking about what rules (or not) that we would have (or not). We aren’t officially formal like with a contract like some DD relationships are, but i know what’s expected. (i knew before too, but chose not to do it!). So we reestablished some old rules and created some new ones too.

Some of the old rules that we reestablished are:

  • No bra. (i’d started wearing it again. i mean, why not?!?)
  • No taking a (warm/ relaxing) bath without permission. (Ugh…. ok)
  • Refer to Sir as Sir. (not a problem. i rather missed this one)
  • Wear a corset to shape my body (i’d completely stopped this one because sometimes corsets aren’t comfortable at all)
  • Show respect at all times (of course, i’d unintentionally reverted to pre-DD style – see last post for more info really)
  • And … you guessed it …. NO MASTURBATION WITHOUT PERMISSION. (okay, i mean, THIS is the one that got me in trouble and caused all the trouble, so i KNEW this one was coming back!)

i decided to ask Sir, “Can i ask Why? i mean, i could see if you said no sometimes. But you don’t. And before when i didn’t ask, it was because i didn’t really think you cared enough to ever say no anyway.”

His answer, “sometimes i want you to know that you are MINE. And when you have to ask to touch yourself, it is forcing you to give up YOU and recognize – and respect – ME, our marriage, and my authority.”

Okay – i should have just asked the first time and not assumed so much or acted the way i did. i admit it. Now. Wish i hadn’t wasted 4-months figuring this out. But i guess this time off hasn’t been terrible either. NO not the best months of our marriage, but it was good for me. Because while i thought i wanted a DD relationship before… NOW I KNOW I DO!

And NOW i know there is not EVER any going back. I LOVE THIS MAN and the way we do this life, marriage, and DD relationship!

SO – a few NEW rules too….

  • NO PANTIES. EVER. (well this one will be a new experience!)
  • NO Pajamas either. (He’s never liked my soft, cotton, Mom-style PJ’s… and this too will be a new experience).
  • Dresses should be worn when possible. (Not ‘required’, but preferred. Because now there will be easy access with no bra and no panties on!)
  • Maintenance Spankings. Every Friday. (We technically had a rule about these before, but now they going to have a protocol that includes corner time and will ALWAYS be made up if missed for any reason… like our son/ holidays/ sickness/ etc… so my rear will hurt every weekend now)
  • And the biggest new thing…. a locking Chastity Belt. (for enforcing the last old rule above – NO MASTURBATION WITHOUT PERMISSION.

THIS is currently on order, been shipped, and expected to arrive at our house sometime soon…….

Image result for female chastity

Now i wonder what you are thinking. i certainly know what i was thinking….. “WHOA, what’s this about? WHY?” And then we talked about it. i’m not going to be locked in it 24/7, but rather to be worn at times when i need to be reminded that masturbation and orgasms are NOT my decision. That’s when i’ll be made to wear it. And should i decide i need to do so, it is better to lock myself into it and/or ask for it prior to making an error in judgement (aka: masturbating without permission!) than to be found out afterward. This is much more desirable than to choosing disobedience for the rules Sir has laid out, and made very clear.

So when it arrives, i’ll wear it for awhile. Not sure how long that is, but he will put it on and lock me in it and he will have the key. The only key.

Thankfully it has holes in it so i can use the bathroom without too much trouble really, but that may be even better to keep me locked up even longer without anyone ever knowing. (i’ll keep you posted what i think after wearing it for a bit).

In the end after thinking about it for a couple of days now, i’m actually good with this. Honestly, i think this is a good compromise. It gives me the ability to be disciplined without Sir having to do much, but it could be used for orgasm control too. i think it could be a good solution to forcing me to ask permission to touch myself. And it will cause me to recognize the authority he has in my life and what i’ve voluntarily given up.

And just looking at it, i’m kinda turned on and ready to have a new adventure with this new ‘rule’… and bringing back the old rules already just feel like i’m sliding into an old glove that fits oh-so-well!

So now – back to our normal. The way we do things fits us well. And i’ll tell you about the two spankings i’ve already gotten — maintenance really – in my next posts. But not tonight… you’ll have to wait. i know the spanking types will come back for that! 🙂

Hugs,

Marie