Tag: sir

56 – Confident Sir

Written by Marie on February 22, 2020. Posted in My Dominant Sir. No Comments on 56 – Confident Sir

i don’t typically write twice on the same day, but i am in awe of David today and felt the need to mention this now. He has grown in his confidence and he beams. He tells me things that he would not have before. He doesn’t ask as many questions so much as now he makes statements.

While i’ve grown in my deeper submission, he too has grown and developed as a stronger leader for me and our family. He has truly become my SIR.

But i won’t deny, it truly has been a process. We officially started DD almost two years ago. When we started, it was ME wanting it. i asked David rather slowly and tentatively. At first, David was more or less just going along with it. While he didn’t exactly say these words to me, i think he basically was thinking, “okay, it’s her latest and greatest kink for the bedroom. I’ll go along…” and he did.

But that’s just it. It wasn’t a kink (okay, maybe it IS…. but still!) just for the bedroom or a fad that would go away. i wanted this to be a new way of life and a new lifestyle to which we were committed to and would define our relationship. And slowlyyyyyyyy over these two years, i’ve seen him take on a true Dom personality that has REALLY culminated in the last few weeks, but especially the last couple of days.

i told you how in the fall we fell out of the DD lifestyle. Because i didn’t really think he liked it, that he was (still) just going along with it, and didn’t really “care” about it, i basically didn’t either. And because the fall season is always busy at our house with our son in high school, so… i just dropped it.

But coming up to Christmas – i missed it. i missed who we were. i hoped he would want to get it back. i had noticed we were always fighting about stupid stuff, i didn’t show him respect – in my actions, words, or thoughts – and well, things weren’t going well. So that’s when i texted him i miss spanking and he texted back, “Me too”.

With that response, THAT was when i realized for the first time that he truly had come to like the DD lifestyle and being my Dom. And i was equally excited … and sad. Excited because i had a chance to get back what i thought was lost and sad for having lost it in the first place.

From T-H-A-T day in January until now, he has started truly being in charge, telling me what to do, and disciplining when it’s needed. He has set new rules and enforced them too. And he is adamant about NOT missing maintenance either.

THIS time, it’s different. It is intentional on his part. Not just mine. And in the past 24-hours, he’s been more Dom-like than ever before.

First, he texted saying if i could go home early for maintenance, that would be preferable. So i did because i could. When i got home, he was eating a late afternoon meal and watching t.v. i greeted him cordially but i wasn’t entirely sure if he wanted to do maintenance then, later, or what. So i asked him.

And his response was, “From now on, assume that when you come in the door on Friday after work, you are to……go straight to our bedroom, get completely naked, stand with your feet on the floor next to the bed, bent over at the waist. And on your back should rest the paddle. You shall wait until I am ready to come in and join you, however long that may be. Don’t make noise, don’t ask questions, and do NOT move from that position until after maintenance is complete – no matter HOW long you have to wait for me to arrive! Do I make myself clear?”

Wow. Okay then. That is without a doubt, THE most dominant thing he has EVER said to me. It was direct, clear, un-questioning and un-waivering.

“Yes Sir, it is very clear.”

And i turned and went to do as he said. Which then resulted in the most painful spanking to date. Without preamble. Without much notice. And definitely without asking me “if it’s okay, I’d like to….”, to which i was incredibly thrilled about!

That brings us to this morning….. when i told him that in my deeper submission thoughts…. that i want to implement a new rule about “what he puts in, only he can take out” he said, “okay.”

Hmm. His response wasn’t too excited or convincing. Maybe he doesn’t really think this is a good idea and this is just me “topping from the bottom”. Oh well, i said it and that’s all i can do for now.

i went on to say that i would NOT talk about it (“it” being whatever he put in), whine about it, beg for it to come out, or otherwise mention it. That i would trust that he would remember, not forget about me, and tell me when he felt it was time to come out. Again, he said, “okay”.

Geez, me and my big ideas.

And that’s when he left the house to go play golf. He texted me shortly afterward though and said, “I didn’t have time to put the purple metal plug in, but you need to do that now. Text me a pic that I can see it went in.”

Oh well, maybe this isn’t such a bad idea afterall…..

And i did as he requested…. at 9:00 a.m. this morning.

When i texted the pic, i asked him, “Does that make you happy?” (Genuine, not sarcastic). And then i went on to say that i see giving him the authority to decide if/ when it comes out as another sign of submission and it makes me happy.

And he wrote, “Yep and Good!”

Man of few words, but i did anticipate a little more than that too. This is really not my best idea. Well, i guess i’ll see how today goes. But i’ll leave it in and hope you don’t forget.

He got home from golf at 3:00 and he has not said ONE-SINGLE-WORD-ABOUT-THE-PLUG-ALL-DAY.

IT IS STILL IN. This is THE longest i have EVER worn a plug. And …. while it’s uncomfortable from this length of time in, it’s not “that bad”… but if he said take it out, i’d be all-too-happy to do so too!

But it made me wonder, “Did he forget?” So – i debated – but i worked up the courage to ask……

i said, “Sir, while i am NOT complaining or asking for relief because i said i wouldn’t do that, did you forget about the plug?”

He responded with an incredulous look and said, “NO, I did NOT forget. And why are you asking when you said you wouldn’t? I assume I don’t have to talk about it or confirm it is still in. Is it still in?”

“Yes Sir”

“Show me. Now.”

So i turned around, bent over, and pulled down my pants.

He said, “Looks great.”

THAT’s IT? AGAIN? …. i thought there should be more….

i said, “So do you want to touch it? Can it come out? Are you surprised i left it in?”

And he said, “You are asking a lot of questions. Do you want to be spanked?”

“No Sir”

“Okay, so where’s the trust you texted about? Do you NOT trust me to remember, to make good decisions and to tell you what I want?”

“I do”

“Then stop asking questions before I put even more bruises on your already bruised ass. And go away and quit asking… with the plug IN place!”

WOW. TWO DAYS IN A ROW. He is MY DOMINANT HUSBAND! i beamed.

i said, “Thank you Sir. i love this confident dominance you are showing me.”

And with that, he smiled and said, “Good! Go put on a thinner fabric, tighter fitting shirt, so I can see your nipples better. And plan to wear it to dinner tonight.”

i’m not allowed to wear a bra unless i’m at work in a shirt that requires it.

So i did.

And so here i sit – with a purple plug in my ass still and a form-fitting shirt, no bra and no panties, and preparing to go to dinner……. where people could see my nipples.

But i am confident that my husband is a CONFIDENT SIR. And he will NOT forget about me, he will beam when others look at my nipples, and i will be proud of who i am and who he’s become.

And i feel most confident that my latest kinky sex fad is now a permanent lifestyle that has changed my husband into my very confident and dominant husband who i call Sir!

Hugs,
Marie

50 – Chastity Belt … Update

Written by Marie on February 16, 2020. Posted in Chastity Belt, Marriage, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Denial. No Comments on 50 – Chastity Belt … Update

So because i mentioned it before and in a few comments, i’ve been asked for an update on the progress on my chastity belt, i decided to do just that… update you.

i’ve been doing a LOT of research. i’ve found a lot of chastity belts… gag gifts, very (VERY!) pricey, effective but not for me, ineffective and probably only good for pictures, and …. well… one that i have on order. This is what it looks like:

i rarely take (sexual/ naked) pictures of myself … and those that i do, only go to my husband… and never with my face…. but i promise you, if this one works as i hope it does, i’ll post a picture with it on for you. 🙂

CHASTITY BELT – WHY?!?

Okay, well, let’s review…. my husband and Sir, is the head of our house and of me. i am submissive. He has been trying to train me that my private parts are for him. And i’m only allowed to make myself happy with permission. This means that i am open to his touch whenever he wants to and if i want it by my own touch, i have to ask to masturbate and/or orgasm.

He feels orgasm control is the ultimate in my submission because forcing me to ask his permission to touch myself in a most intimate way means he controls my pleasure. And orgasm denial – both mine when I submit to his control and his when he says no – forces me to NOT be selfishly satisfy my OWN needs without putting him before me. And frankly, while i don’t particularly like not cumming when I want to, i do see his point.

i don’t like the rule because he makes me ask in person. It is VERY humbling (and submissive!) to say, “May i have permission to masturbate and to cum please Sir?”

And the seconds between that sentence and the answer sometimes feel like an eternity.

He frequently says yes, but sometimes he does indeed say no.

i think he says no for two reasons: 1) i tend to ask a lot (3-5x’s a week on average – and sometimes multiple times in the same day)…. and 2) because he can. And by saying no, it is an effective rule that i know requires no explanation, no further discussion, and is the final answer.

Well – the “NO” answer is what has led to this place. i’ve tried to be good. i’ve tried to accept that “NO” as his decision. i’ve tried to ignore the desire. But sometimes…. the more i try to ignore it, the more it becomes a ‘thing’ that i can’t successfully ignore.

So similar to a child doing something in secret and hoping to not be caught, i sneak into the closet and do it anyway.

And truly, i have done it and was not caught.

But my guilty conscious weighs heavy.

And i confess.

And i’m punished. Typically with a very intensive spanking, standing in the corner to contemplate it, and sometimes a second spanking.

But …. while that works ‘that day’, it hasn’t been a permanent solution…. and it’s rather detective than preventive.

So David decided i needed to research and find and buy a female chastity belt that was reasonably priced, effective, and able to be worn for long(er) periods of time. And i’ve done just that. And as mentioned, we have one on order. This is the one I bought.

i’ll make you wait to hear more though…. next post my friends. 🙂

(Am i being mean to make you wait?!? David makes me wait to cum…. so i’ll make you wait to hear about the chastity belt…. ha!)

i will leave you with this interesting article i found – Top 10 Facts About Chastity Belts…..https://www.top10hq.com/top-10-facts-about-chastity-belts/

Hugs,
Marie

46 – First spanking in 2020

Written by Marie on January 9, 2020. Posted in Punishment, Spanking. No Comments on 46 – First spanking in 2020

So it didn’t take me long! In our re-start of D/s, i wasted NO time in getting my backside set in pain.. in grand form.

Hindsight is 20/20. Get it?! HIND and the year is 2020? Okay, maybe a bad joke. But i liked it. lol.

So this happened yesterday. i got soooo mad at a client at work. And that was right before i came home, so the entire commute home i stewed about it. So when i got home, i was still mad.

When David asked me how my day was, i told him (calmly.. …mostly…… okay, maybe not at all calmly…. i tried!) about how mad i was at this client and why. That’s when he started giving me advice and suggestions for how to deal with the client and the situation. The only thing was, i didn’t want or need his advice. i only told him … (okay, i’ll admit it ….NOT so calmly) … because he asked.

i do recognize that David was only trying to help. But i didn’t want his help. And i let him know…. in a not-so-calm kind of way.

i raised my voice … in frustration really.. and said, “i know all that already. This client is unreasonable and there’s no solution. So stop trying to help. And of course i was standing in front of him when i said this, so i ended with “can i go now?” i wasn’t even sure if i needed to ask if i could go, but given how i got to that moment, it felt natural to say outloud to him.

That’s when he said, “Excuse me? T-H-A-T is inappropriate. I think you might need to have an attitude adjustment.”

i very calmly (yes, it was calm this time because i knew i’d gone over the edge at this point)….said, “might or definite?”

He said, “Definite. N-O-W. Go get undressed and prepare yourself. i have things to do and i’ll be there when i’m there” i knew he was mad. Rightfully so.

So i did as instructed. i didn’t argue. i knew i shouldn’t have used the tone i did. But i was just so mad and he sent me over the edge.. and i lost control of myself. You know how you ‘take it out on the ones you love most”?? Well, that’s what happened. i clearly couldn’t yell at my client, so i yelled at David. Inappropriately.

i went to our bedroom and prepared for the spanking. i got undressed. Completely. As required. i assumed the spank position, which is where i stand on the floor, feet shoulder-width apart, hands on the bed, face looking at the bed (and my hands), feet squarely on the floor.

He likes for me to keep my heels on the floor when getting spanked and NOT MOVE. Impossible. No-can-do. As much as i try, i’ve NEVER succeeded in this. And that gets me into even more trouble. i happen to think physics won’t allow it. i mean when you spank, you send the butt forward, which causes the heels to leave the floor. Am i right or wrong? If wrong, any suggestions for being successful with this?!? i’ll gladly listen!!

i waited.

i’m not sure how long, but it felt about 15 minutes. Maybe longer. It was definitely long enough to really think about my situation and how i treated Sir. How it should have gone. How it will now be properly corrected. And to make my legs and arms a bit stiff from being in position. But i know better than to move too.

He came in. He said, “Do you know why we are here?”

“Yes Sir. i disrespected you by yelling at you and taking my anger out on you when you were only trying to help.”

“So are you prepared to accept your punishment now?”
“Yes Sir, i am”.

And he pulled the paddle out of the drawer. i couldn’t see it, but i know where it’s kept and i definitely recognized the sound of the drawer opening and closing. The paddle is Sir’s favorite tool. It hurts. It is big enough that with just one swing it covers my entire ass, so every single swing is a complete and total sting to my complete butt. No escape even when he moves his aim. It’s all the same. Pain all over from the first to the last swing of the paddle.

And the first one came. (H-O-L-Y CRAPPPPP….. it’s been a LONG time since we’ve done this. And i forgot just how painful that paddle is. And i knew he was reserving his swing to warm me up, but probably also to do the same for himself since we both were out of practice. And my heels came off the floor. Of course.)

And the second one. (how many can i take today? and my heels came off the floor and i’m already doing a little dance. Unacceptable and i know it!)

That’s when he says, “We are trying something different. Follow me. Now”.

So he walks to the kitchen. David does all the cooking in our house. i found this really cool, custom made Lazy Susan for the table to give him for Christmas. He pulled it to the edge of the table. He said, “Rest your hands, palm down, on this Lazy Susan. If it moves, or if your hands come off of it, you’ll regret it and receive even more punishment.”

THAT was a sexy turn on for me. i absolutely LOVE it when he takes charge and tells me what to do.. even when i’m in trouble. i felt my pussy let out it’s juices.

i did as i was told.

And immediately, i felt the next swing of the paddle hit. And my hands moved the Lazy Susan. Sir said, “Oh that was bad.”

And then he peppered my ass with a bunch of swats over and over and over. And i was surprised at how fast they came and they were causing my ass to sting something fierce. It was on fire!

i wasn’t good about the Lazy Susan not moving OR the heels coming off the floor at all. So Sir said, “you are not doing well with my instructions. I’m going to make your ass pay for this.”

And he did. Over and over again.

i tried to keep count, but i failed. Sir doesn’t make me count out loud, but i do try to do it in my head as it gives me something to focus on. But he was going so fast and hard that i lost count in a hurry.

And not only that, my ass was burning so badly with every-single-swing of the big ass-covering sized paddle that it was all i could do to try to take it with grace.

i felt the tears well up. i’ve never cried. i don’t know if i felt tears because of how long it had been since i was in this position and out of shape, or if Sir was going extra hard for having gotten mad and making a point here, or maybe it was my own mind working to break my spirited self. No matter ‘why’ i suppose really.

But as soon as i felt the tears forming, Sir said, “we are done with this spanking.” And i stood up, and he hugged me and kissed me. Told me he was proud of me and i did as i always do, i said, “Thank you Sir for the discipline. Thank you for being my head of house and thank you for your love.”

To which i thought then all would be forgiven, but instead, Sir said, “We aren’t quite done with the discipline though.” THIS is new…

He took me to the food pantry – still very naked and with a VERY sore butt that was throbbing in high gear – and said, “Stick out your tongue.”

And he grabbed the hot sauce. i HATE HOT STUFF. And Sir knows it. He LOVES hot stuff. So he has multiple bottles of it with varying heat. Thankfully, he chose a low-level heat sauce. (i’m not so sure the next time will be with the low-heat hot sauce).

He opened the bottle, poured some into his hand, and said, “Lick my hand clean.”

i cringed. But i did it. And immediately felt my tongue go hot. And then i swallowed. HOLY CRAP the back of my throat is on FIRE now.

He said, “You received the spanking for the disrespect and anger you showed, but this is for the volume you used. Next time you should consider chosing your words and volume more carefully.”

i said very simply, “Yes Sir.”

And then i swallowed. And it burned even more. That fire was in my throat for about 30-minutes and the tears came back to my eyes.

That’s when he said, “All is forgiven now.”
To which i responded with a simple, “Thank you Sir”

And waited for the burn in my ass and on my throat to subside.

That’s when i went to get dressed. i was surprised to find that my nipples were erect and my pussy was very wet. i didn’t expect to find that much arousal from this, but i know i love David so much for the discipline he administers and for being the Head of my life that it does get me excited. So i suppose i wasn’t really surprised for being wet.. but rather at how wet i was. He didn’t touch me sexually. He doesn’t when it is true discipline and i’m glad for that because that just gets confusing then.

So even though my renewed D/s first week hasn’t gone toooooo swell for my tongue or my ass, i’m grateful for Sir’s leadership and reinstalled corrections. The rest of the night was without issue and all really was forgiven and forgotten, to which i’m grateful for as well. Pre D/s the first time or even in recent months, we would have been in a huge fight and it would have lasted hours. Not now. We have effective resolution management.

In case you are wondering, my ass is still a bit sore today and slightly bruised. And tomorrow is when we resume our weekly maintenance day. Oh-My.

Hugs,

Marie

45 – New and Old Rules.

Written by Marie on January 6, 2020. Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 45 – New and Old Rules.

After David and i talked a LOT, we started talking about what rules (or not) that we would have (or not). We aren’t officially formal like with a contract like some DD relationships are, but i know what’s expected. (i knew before too, but chose not to do it!). So we reestablished some old rules and created some new ones too.

Some of the old rules that we reestablished are:

No bra. (i’d started wearing it again. i mean, why not?!?)
No taking a (warm/ relaxing) bath without permission. (Ugh…. ok)
Refer to Sir as Sir. (not a problem. i rather missed this one)
Wear a corset to shape my body (i’d completely stopped this one because sometimes corsets aren’t comfortable at all)
Show respect at all times (of course, i’d unintentionally reverted to pre-DD style – see last post for more info really)
And … you guessed it …. NO MASTURBATION WITHOUT PERMISSION. (okay, i mean, THIS is the one that got me in trouble and caused all the trouble, so i KNEW this one was coming back!)

i decided to ask Sir, “Can i ask Why? i mean, i could see if you said no sometimes. But you don’t. And before when i didn’t ask, it was because i didn’t really think you cared enough to ever say no anyway.”

His answer, “sometimes i want you to know that you are MINE. And when you have to ask to touch yourself, it is forcing you to give up YOU and recognize – and respect – ME, our marriage, and my authority.”

Okay – i should have just asked the first time and not assumed so much or acted the way i did. i admit it. Now. Wish i hadn’t wasted 4-months figuring this out. But i guess this time off hasn’t been terrible either. NO not the best months of our marriage, but it was good for me. Because while i thought i wanted a DD relationship before… NOW I KNOW I DO!

And NOW i know there is not EVER any going back. I LOVE THIS MAN and the way we do this life, marriage, and DD relationship!

SO – a few NEW rules too….

NO PANTIES. EVER. (well this one will be a new experience!)
NO Pajamas either. (He’s never liked my soft, cotton, Mom-style PJ’s… and this too will be a new experience).
Dresses should be worn when possible. (Not ‘required’, but preferred. Because now there will be easy access with no bra and no panties on!)
Maintenance Spankings. Every Friday. (We technically had a rule about these before, but now they going to have a protocol that includes corner time and will ALWAYS be made up if missed for any reason… like our son/ holidays/ sickness/ etc… so my rear will hurt every weekend now)
And the biggest new thing…. a locking Chastity Belt. (for enforcing the last old rule above – NO MASTURBATION WITHOUT PERMISSION.

THIS is currently on order, been shipped, and expected to arrive at our house sometime soon…….

Now i wonder what you are thinking. i certainly know what i was thinking….. “WHOA, what’s this about? WHY?” And then we talked about it. i’m not going to be locked in it 24/7, but rather to be worn at times when i need to be reminded that masturbation and orgasms are NOT my decision. That’s when i’ll be made to wear it. And should i decide i need to do so, it is better to lock myself into it and/or ask for it prior to making an error in judgement (aka: masturbating without permission!) than to be found out afterward. This is much more desirable than to choosing disobedience for the rules Sir has laid out, and made very clear.

So when it arrives, i’ll wear it for awhile. Not sure how long that is, but he will put it on and lock me in it and he will have the key. The only key.

Thankfully it has holes in it so i can use the bathroom without too much trouble really, but that may be even better to keep me locked up even longer without anyone ever knowing. (i’ll keep you posted what i think after wearing it for a bit).

In the end after thinking about it for a couple of days now, i’m actually good with this. Honestly, i think this is a good compromise. It gives me the ability to be disciplined without Sir having to do much, but it could be used for orgasm control too. i think it could be a good solution to forcing me to ask permission to touch myself. And it will cause me to recognize the authority he has in my life and what i’ve voluntarily given up.

And just looking at it, i’m kinda turned on and ready to have a new adventure with this new ‘rule’… and bringing back the old rules already just feel like i’m sliding into an old glove that fits oh-so-well!

So now – back to our normal. The way we do things fits us well. And i’ll tell you about the two spankings i’ve already gotten — maintenance really – in my next posts. But not tonight… you’ll have to wait. i know the spanking types will come back for that! 🙂

Hugs,

Marie

44 – Fixing what broke

Written by Marie on January 6, 2020. Posted in Marriage, Submission, Uncategorized. No Comments on 44 – Fixing what broke

TODAY – Jan 6, 2020 – is mine and Sir’s 19th anniversary. And i couldn’t be happier that we ‘made up’ and are ‘back to normal’. Of course, the normal that includes domestic discipline (DD), him being the Head of Household (HoH), me being submissive and accepting of punishment.

See the thing was, before we ever did DD we weren’t “happily married”. Oh i thought we were. Mostly. But then i knew somewhere inside that we really weren’t. i never felt like i respected him the way i should. In fact, one time (long ago!) he actually called me out on it! And i was like, “What do you mean I don’t respect you?! What exactly do you expect me to do to show you ‘respect’????” … with the word “respect” being spit at him with distain and in such a mocking voice that any self-respecting man would have recognized that i was a shrew in need of a good spanking! But because we had no such DD in our life then, we got into a HUGE fight and at the end nothing got resolved so we just agreed to disagree and ‘forget’ it.

But then, after we started doing DD a bit more than a year ago….we talked more than ever, i showed respect the way he deserved, we had ways to resolve disagreements and we were happy. And disagreement… well… they rarely happened because we both knew who was in charge and who’s word mattered. And i liked it!

And when we stopped… it all went away. The calm, the resolution, the respect, and the best marriage ever. Obviously, my marriage didn’t technically ‘go away’, but it may as well have. So i knew it could be “back to normal” if i’d just stop being stubborn, let my heart be exposed and ask for forgiveness and to start again. So that’s what caused me to step out in faith and risk being rejected and send the text.

What …..a text? Why not show true courage and speak in person? Well in person would’ve been the best option, but i was feeling insecure… and it took the whole ride to work to give me the courage to talk at all! So text was better than nothing.

So i texted Sir and said, “i miss spanking” and he immediately responded with “me too”, and just like that….we started talking. My husband is NOT a talker so to talk as much as we have, i can tell he really did want a do-over and to start fresh as much as i did.

And despite a possible rejection, he did the opposite – he made my heart SOAR!

The BEST (early) anniversary gift ever!

At the time that i caused the problems though and refused to be spanked, i really didn’t think he LIKED the DD stuff. i felt that he did it for a couple of reasons but mainly because i asked him to do it. So after he wasn’t doing what i thought he should, as Dom and HoH, i decided this charade was stupid and didn’t want to do it anymore. YES, i DID want to do the DD and D/s. But i wanted him to want to do it. Not me wanting him to do it with him simply obliging.

And it wasn’t until he got SO mad that day that i realized that maybe he started doing it for me and because i asked, but by the time we ‘called it quits’ he was really doing it because he wanted to. But then it felt like it was just too late.

i had screwed up and it was what it was. You made your bed, so lie in it. And accept it. And be happy too! Except i wasn’t happy.

So when i initiated the text, that was when truly we started talking again too.

The first thing he really said to me about everything was, “Short of abusing you by forcing you to accept punishments that I deem necessary, this doesn’t work. And in the process, I feel as if you are just playing at this and not being submissive at all. So when you choose to stop playing, I’m left feeling betrayed for having believed this was real.”

Wow. That really opened my eyes! i know that the sub has a lot of power to accept or deny a Dom’s authority. But i never really thought about how it would (figuratively) castrate him if i “just stop”, and especially in grand form the way i did!

So – i apologized. Profusely.

And we talked about ‘if this ever happens again’ what would i tell and suggest that Sir do in the future if this ever happen again. Well, since i’ve had a LOT (4-months now) of time to think about this, i actually had an answer.

i told him, “Ignore me. Completely. Do not speak to me at all, except to say, ‘Are you ready to accept the punishment that you know you deserve now?’

And i went on to say, “if you ignore me and do NOT speak to me, even if it takes days, i know i will come around. i may be stubborn as all get out and take that long, but i will change and accept my punishment properly. And while sitting here now i’d like to say this won’t ever be a problem again, i can’t be certain. But what i am certain of is i love who we are when you are my HoH and i submit! So i DO want this!”

His response, “I can do that.” (And i know he will!)

He then asked, “But truly …What IF you decide you really don’t want to do DD or HoH anymore?” My response was easy, “i know i won’t ever NOT want this….as i’ve missed you and our ways so much in these months. But ‘if’ i ever decide that, we will talk about it when we aren’t dealing with a punishment situation and with level-heads. And we won’t talk about it until after i accept the punishment that i refused. Either way, it won’t happen until we are past that situation and able to talk properly. i am willing to write that down now on paper if need be.” (He said to blog about it…. so i am! lol).

So today – January 6, 2020 – is our anniversary and we have now been married for 19-years. i know the next (however many) years ahead will be WAY better than the last ones because we have a new (permanent!) way of doing things.

A way that works. A way that i’ve learned i need in my life and i need Sir to be the one i do it with. And i’m happy…. again.

And that’s when i got spanked for the original punishment….. for masturbating without permission or approval. I’ll talk more about how that went in the next post!

Hugs,

Marie