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217 – Fine line between passing and failing!

Written by Marie on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 217 – Fine line between passing and failing!

When we go out of town… i tend to press the envelope of acceptable behavior. i don’t exactly mean to. Most of the time, it just happens.

Our family, all 3 of us, is currently out of town for 3-days. i am making a concerted effort to do better this time. And yet, i’ve already had some (small) slip ups. Hopefully the small doesn’t add up to a lot though too!

And that’s just it…. Small things are usually done and taken all in good fun. It’s when it happens over and over, becomes intentional, or even habit forming that it’s not ok anymore.

We are visiting in town to visit a university that our son is interested in possibly attending, so we came to town on Sunday and will be here until Tuesday.

On Sunday as we were trying to find a place to eat dinner, David made a comment that went like this, “when I was online looking for a restaurant, there were like 10 open places on this Sunday night. Whereas other nights… there would be… like…. Well… a bunch.”

To that, our son repeated, “yeah. A Bunch!” where he said in a mocking but funny tone.

And i laughed.

Mostly at our son being a bit of a smart ass, but in a fun, kidding kind of way. Our son had no malice or ill will intended, so it was funny and we (our son and i) laughed at David’s expense.

To which, David said, “hey! I hear you laughing at me. You will get in trouble if you continue!”

Our son heard that and immediately assumed it was directed at him for his comment, so he said, “ohhh yahhhh I’m so not worried.”

But in reality, while David’s comment may have been directed at him, or may have been all in good fun too, i tend to think it was more of a warning to me. And, all in good fun and the spirit of the moment, i said, “yeah. i’m so NOT worried too!”

My response was said it in the truest smart ass way possible. It was when David looked directly at me and raised his eyebrows that he said, “you should be!” that i knew i was pressing the envelope of acceptability which prompted me to (wisely) close my mouth.

So while it was all in good fun and we laughed, i tend to (ultimately) take it too far and land myself in hot water by the end of every trip. (Aka: fine line… passing and failing!)

i need to be on better behavior (passing grades) now for the next 48-hours or else i may find my ass turned red upon our return home on Tuesday night.

Sooooooo everything you just read was written on Sunday night. Now, Monday morning …. wouldn’t you know……. i wasn’t even able to get this message completed and posted and i got my ass chewed out (verbally) by David in front of our son.

i forgot to bring some medicines (while not life-threatening, fairly important) with us on this trip. As such, now we are having to make some added stops at the pharmacy that were unplanned and out of the way.

Plus of course, it is costing us unnecessary money too because while we have insurance and it should be covered, because we have some in stock at home and it’s “between scrips” While the meds would ultimately get used and the money would ultimately be spent, it wasn’t something that was on our agenda or in the budget for this day either.

When it was discovered, David was extremely irritated and let me know it, in NO uncertain terms too. To which, i stayed silent. In the past, i’d have jabbed back and/or deflected blame, but that ALWAYS gets us into a fight too. So instead, while i did not think i was entirely to blame, i chose to hold my tongue.

Because the forgotten medicine is technically for our son, and he’s 17 and my husband is an adult too, i am not the only one who could’ve or should’ve thought to pack it. Therefore, i am not the only one who forgot it. That said, i am usually the one who takes responsibility and gets it packed, but this time, i did not. And of course, it is needed. And of course, then i was blamed. Ugh!

But rather than fighting about who’s to blame, which won’t change anything anyway (!!) i took the heat in the moment, but i am also now absolutely sure there will be punishment inflicted upon our return home.

Ugh…..

“What will be the punishment?”, you ask….

i have no real idea actually. But…. i am certain it is coming. i will be shocked if it doesn’t happen.

Soooo – now i have 36-hours to try to finish this trip without further issues!

Like i said, it’s all good fun…. Until it’s not.

So cheers to me trying hard to stay good, and yet, not quite making the passing grade! (Get the pun today – as we visit a University, i am thinking about grades and schooling! Apparently i need more schooling in order to have a passing grade!)

Hugs,

Marie

214 – My DISCIPLINED LIFE is not just about sex

Written by Marie on . Posted in Deep Thoughts, Submission. No Comments on 214 – My DISCIPLINED LIFE is not just about sex

**Fair warning… full of deep thoughts and i got extra wordy today. Hope you stick to the end, but if you don’t, i get it! 😉

As of late, i have written a lot more about sex than discipline. While allowing sex to happen in any moment that pleases my husband is being submissive too, my “disciplined life” isn’t just about that either.

(** but in times of my intentional orgasm denial, i tend to think, walk, and talk S-E-X… so it’s easy to talk about A LOT!). Plus, domination and submission is sexy too. So there’s that!…. ANYWAY…..)

Our relationship does have rules, just not a formal contract, that include more than “just sex stuff” and all rules apply all the time. No matter where we are, what we do, who is with us…. The rules apply.

That may sound harsh, but i like it. It is consistent. We both know what to expect. i won’t say the rules are always applied correctly, or that we don’t change them, or that sometimes the rules need to be bent for certain situations because, well….they do. i should add that not just the rules are bent, but the consequences are sometimes also as well. While having “always applied” and “consistent practiced” being the ideal, it’s not practical. Unfortunately we have “life” that occurs causing rules and consequences to be bent.

The most obvious of reasons why the rules change (or get bent or transgressions more quickly forgiven without any real consequences) is illness. When either one of us do not feel well, it’s hard to do anything at all, let alone be dominant or submissive.

And sometimes we just “don’t feel like it” too. The most obvious time we don’t “feel” up to following the rules or enforcing the consequences is STRESS (and-or deadlines), especially stemming from work.

When we don’t feel like it, we have problems though. “Houston….. we have a problem” or multiple problems even!

Usually the problems start with ignoring the rules. When we say “it doesn’t apply” in this situation or for this reason or let’s take a break tonight or or or….. it amounts to excuses.

And like all things in life, we need to adhere to certain rules whether we “feel” like it or not. For example… can you imagine ignoring trash day because you don’t feel like it? Or how about ignoring the electric bill because you were “too busy” to get it paid?

We live by rules in our everyday life for a reason: to keep order.

And when they are not followed: chaos ensues.

So what are my rules? Really the answer to this question is also, in part, why we don’t have a contract. My rules are fairly general and generic. Things like, “Always show respect” and “Never talk back” and “say Sir when speaking to David”. And of course, i recently spoke about them in-depth recently and you can read all about it if you’d like.

Most of the times, my rules are easy but sometimes being so generic, it gets misunderstood or misinterpreted and that lands me in hot water. Most of the time though, the trouble i land is is me trying to use the vagueness to my advantage when i don’t “feel” like following the rules. That’s when i say, “oh. i didn’t realize you wanted ME to do that.” Or “i didn’t hear you Sir.” When i did. i knew. And i heard just fine. But I ignored him. On purpose.

And he knew it too.

Now he knows i lied too.

But he can’t prove it either.

And we both know.

THIS is where a good Dominant will enforce the rules anyway. Maybe a warning or a small punishment would be good. The first time. But not over and over.

So does David have rules too you ask? Well…. To lead our family, including me. He is to be fair and reasonable. Not change the rules on a whim. And enforce the rules for me when needed, whether he “feels” like it or not. Of course like me, sometimes he doesn’t “feel” like it.

When rules are enforced, we both know it has nothing to do with feelings or emotions. There’s a black and white situation at hand. There was a rule. It was broken. Consequences ensue. Consequences are enforced.

Period.

The end.

Feelings are not even relevant. He shouldn’t ever feel guilty about giving a spanking, making me stand in a Corner, or do whatever it is that is appropriate for the situation. Nor should i become emotional, try to twist the situation, or try to get out of the punishment. i earned it, i deserve it, and when it is administered we will both forgive, reset, and move on. (**Notice i did NOT say “forget”? Because neither of us should forget. If the transgressions are forgotten, then the rule is likely to be broken again and again causing unnecessary strife for all!)

i suppose really, how we both act or respond during punishment time is somewhat of a rule also. While i may not want it, or he may not want to give it, it is what it is at that moment. Like trash day… take it out and be done. Don’t overthink it, don’t try to change it, or make someone feel guilty, ashamed, or otherwise emotional about it. Similarly, David should just do it, and i should just accept it.

While it would stand to reason that most of the time, a punishment should be immediate, sometimes it’s not.

The three most obvious reasons that come to mind for not administering punishment immediately are:

1) being in a public place at the time, and

2) around our son and

3) when David is mad.

Taking those one at a time….

PUBLIC PLACES: i would say i tend to act up most while in public. i think the little devious side of me creeps in and says, “there’s nothing he can do about it right now.” So i say/do whatever i want, knowing nothing is going to happen. At least, not then or there. (**Read: brat submissive!)

Not then or there….But there’s no reason why it shouldn’t happen later or in a private place. And to that point, sometimes David doesn’t “feel” like it later or we are tired or we forget….. which gets me out of it. i think in some ways, i am counting on him to not feel like it later. Or maybe i am testing him too. Maybe not in an intentional, well-thought-out or appropriate way, and definitely not an appropriate one either.

A Dominant should always be true to his word. If he says, “you’ll be punished for doing xyz”, then you should be. Even if it happens later. But again, we (as humans, including my Dominant Sir) don’t always feel like it.

Let’s face it, we are not young kids or animals. We don’t have to have the punishment be swift or immediate. Because it’s not like i will forget that quickly why i am being punished later! And if i were to actually forget, it’s not hard to be reminded and think back to it when the punishment is administered too.

2) AROUND KIDS: Kids of any age are likely to think Mom is being beaten and abused if they were to hear Mom being spanked by Dad!

Spanking is NOT a quiet activity. Not only my yelps or tears, but David asking why are we here and talking to me too….. but ESPECIALLY noisy is the paddle itself when it collides with my ass cheeks. It makes a “smack” sound that is not quiet at all. (**there’s a reason why i write “S-M-A-C-K” when i describe my spankings in other posts!).

And while Domestic Discipline is in our marriage and a part of who we are, it’s not easily understood by ADULTS even. i know many of you don’t understand this is consensual, band while i can assure you: it IS!!; HOW would i ever be able to explain that to a child?

When i say child, i don’t just mean small ones. Our 17-year old, Senior in HS is still a child. He does not know about our DD household. (**no, he truly doesn’t!). Many people think and have even told me in emails, “he’s not stupid. He knows!” but i most definitely know he does not. i know this because we do not do any activities, including spanking, ANY time he is in the house. David has always spanked me when our son is away. The only thing our son has ever heard is me saying, “Sir” to David but here in the south, that’s reasonably the norm and our son doesn’t think much of it. (i even received a recent group email with several colleagues and clients were on the email, where one of the people replied all to a previous man’s statement with, “Yes Sir.”. My point is, even in the workplace, hearing someone say those words is not very uncommon.)

3) David is Mad. David has NEVER hit me, intentionally or otherwise, when he was mad. This is how i know he loves me unconditionally. No matter what caused his anger towards me, he has NEVER laid a hand on me until after his anger subsides.

And yet, when the anger subsides, those are the times when i KNOW i WILL be punished for it. The consequences or punishments are ALWAYS dolled out for these times. Without fail. But ALWAYS when he has calmed down.

David says he doesn’t trust himself when he gets angry to not beat me, to not go too far, to not just lash out with all he has. So because he’s still in control, of himself and our household, even when he is his most angry self, he refrains from dishing out all that i deserve.

And that’s how it should be!

That’s the difference between wife-beating and wife-discipline. That’s the difference between consent and non-consent. That’s why i know i can and do trust him to spank me when i most need it, but to never go too far either. And that’s why it’s consensual.

So… MY DISCIPLINED LIFE is about more than sex. It’s about rules. Every day, all the time…. But sometimes not always followed or enforced, even if it should be because… well… that’s life. But we try to do our best and move on from there.

Hugs,

Marie

212 – Rules … can be sexy but not always

Written by Marie on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 212 – Rules … can be sexy but not always

i often refer to “the rules” that we have in a generic sense. And i guess maybe because we don’t have them written down, our “rules” can maybe be considered fairly generic. i think sometimes generic is better, as it can be applied easily overall. And yet, we do have some rules that are fairly specific too.

Even the Constitution of the USA is fairly generic … or maybe general is a better word. The ability to apply it across the board makes it easier to use, and less likely to have any reason to follow up or amend it later.

So what are my rules? i don’t remember actually ever writing about them, so i will do so now…… and if i did before, we’ll, you’ll have a repeat!

But first, i will say… the rules apply 24/7, 365. There’s NEVER a time when they don’t apply. There may be times where the consequences for breaking them need to be bent a bit, but they ALWAYS apply.

1) i am to use the word Sir. Regularly. Often. With intentional meaning too. It is his preferred term of endearment from me as it shows respect and honor. Generally it is a sign of elevation to the one it is being said to and a lowering of the one saying it, so it’s pretty appropriate too.

2) Speak with respect… i am to show respect at all times. Never to yell or insist i am “right” and he is (therefore by default) “wrong”. i can and do make my wishes or opinions known but i always know to do it with respect in my voice, actions, and thoughts.

3) deferral. At the end of the day, only one of us will win. And it won’t be me. And this is ok by me. Honestly, it is. By “not winning” i don’t mean that then i lose though either. i am allowed to speak my thoughts and opinions and i may well have influenced his ultimate decision, but he does have final authority and decision-making power. Over everything. On occasion, he may tell me to make the decision about something but it was even then that ultimately he decided to give over that decision for me to handle in that specific situation. So at all times, i defer to his authority.

4) dress sexy. This means i am to be clean shaven. ALL over. Especially on my puss. Completely devoid of all hair. At ALL times. It also means rarely a bra, on approved occasion panties, and overall fitted, sexy clothes whenever possible. i do not wear frumpy Grandma clothes hardly ever. i say “hardly” because there are times… when feeling ill, doing yard work, etc. but that often.

And yes, the clean shaven puss is required. i wouldn’t say David “inspects” me, but he wants it the way he wants it and expects to find it that way anytime he touches it too. At first, it made me feel childish. Seeing my pussy without hair the first time made me feel strange, awkward, and honestly embarrassed. i happen to think that was part of his intention.

While no hair is practical in more ways than one, having me see my childhood pussy made me feel smaller again. Smaller than him, allows him to be slightly elevated, which goes to the previous rules… he is in charge, he is to be respected with Sir, to be deferred to, and makes the decisions. This was a physical and visual part of it come to life.

5) always ask to take a soaking, warm, relaxing bath. i told you about this in the last post but i will mention a bit of the particulars once more here too. Because i don’t do well having fully access to my naked body, especially when my mind slows down and my body is still, that i am tempted beyond my abilities. So he requires that i ask permission ahead of doing so, sometimes it is denied but frequently approved. And he checks on me regularly while there to ensure i am being good the entire time.

6) maintenance spanking on Fridays. i have talked a lot about this in separate posts also. But in the interest of keeping all the rules listed in one place, it’s here too.

i won’t talk much here because it is well documented throughout my blog, but I’ve will suffice to say, “practice makes perfect.” This is for both David and i. David has learned perfectly just exactly how to spank. That sounds silly writing it, but it’s true. When we first started doing domestic discipline, he was not good at it. It’s hard to know how much is enough, too much, or too little. When he first started out, he was so afraid of abusing me and going too far, that he absolutely went too little, As well, i also found the point that i know it’s effective but not too much …. Or too little.

Maintenance reinforces what we want. Keeps it in the front of my mind of what could be (even worse yet), if the submissive mindset fails to operate as intended. In other words, if/when these rules are broken, a punishment will ensue.

7) my body belongs to him. i do not touch myself sexually for pleasure without his permission. Well, officially i am allowed to “touch” and even edge myself if i wish to, but i am NEVER to orgasm without express authority AND even the edging is supposed to be with permission or at least me telling him that’s what i am doing. And sometimes he orders edging, which of course, i comply.

i have to ask to orgasm every single time, even at his touch too.

Frequently this last rule is the one i struggle with the most, which is why i write a lot of sex-charged posts from me. Mainly i struggle with it because i have come to realize that giving him authority and power in all things in our house and especially over me is truly a turn on for me.

i find his power is super sexy. i have always been more attracted to confident men, and ones who take charge and get things done especially. But of course, in current times it seems men are taught that a strong confident authoritative man is too much. Men are taught that they are to treat their wife as their equal, so lots of men squash down that part of them that is the confident, decision-making part, for fear of backlash if-when they let that out. But for me, when David is especially in his Dominant space, i go to my sub space too…. In or out of the bedroom. But of course, it gets me ALL wet all the same too!

And in my sub space, i am so turned on and completely intoxicated as he exerts his authority over me that i just want to orgasm right then and there on the spot. And when i need to touch myself (or try too hard to get him to touch me), i usually become focused on achieving that O a little too much, which of course, lands me in trouble where consequences ensue…. Which leads me to post here either about the sexual charge OR the punishment OR both!

My point though is that Domestic Discipline (DD) isn’t especially or necessarily about sex. It’s more about authority and control, but it often has a sexual-component to it too.

And specifically, as of late, i have now completed 4-consecutive nights of sleeping up close and snuggled in with Glory. (i do think that name fits.)

For me, wanting to encourage my Husband to fully take charge AND as i think about dressing sexy for him, i think the repressed inner-sexy-slut girl yearns to be let out. (Yes, women have been taught to be a “good girl” we are to be sexually chaste, but truly, we should be taught to let it out… especially for and with our husbands!).

So when David calls me his Good Girl that inner sexy-self does come out, and it all becomes so much about sex that it seems to be more of my focus.

AND LASTLY…. i’m not entirely sure if i would call this a “rule,” but maybe….

8-maybe-a-rule) if and when the rules are broken, to expect… and accept… the punishment that results. Frequently the punishment is a VERY-hard, make-me-regret-my-actions spanking. But it doesn’t have to be and isn’t always that either as the punishment can and often does reflect the transgression. (So is this a rule, or more of just what to expect when the rules are not followed!?)

i can’t think of any other rules, it if i have an “oh yah, i forgot…” moment, i’ll update this post.

So speaking of inner sexy-slut-GOOD-submissive-wife-girl… i need to go be and do all that now….. be a submissive wife …. While asking for the key to Glory to be removed in order to start my day! (For the record, officially Glory could stay on, as it’s actually able. But i really don’t like going to the bathroom and soiling her or me anymore than necessary either…. Yah, now i’m edging back toward chastity belt discussions… i’ll stop now. But just for now. 😉).

(How’s that for a Non-Glory filled post? Yah, ok… failed. Oh well. At least it wasn’t “just” about her either!)

Hugs,

Marie

209 – Happiness is a warm (chastity) blanket

Written by Marie on . Posted in My Dominant Sir. No Comments on 209 – Happiness is a warm (chastity) blanket

i really don’t know that i can explain my fascination with chastity but i am going to try…..

When i wear my belt, it gives me comfort. Kind of like a security blanket. It makes me happy. It makes me crave more of it.

We put things we want to keep under lock and key. Our car, house, valuables in a safe, are all locked up when not in use. So when i wear a chastity belt, it is a tangible, visible, and especially physical reminder that my pussy is not mine at all. And it’s valuable enough to want to lock it up, and to be kept safe, until it’s use it needed or required.

i especially think it is super submissive of me to lock myself in it (consent), and to hand over the key willingly (control) to Sir.

i actually think it looks super sexy when it’s on too. i really like watching around the house with nothing on except the belt. It is a very visible reminder that what is locked up is not mine.

** Side note: i have been chatting online with two possible additional Doms . i have told you before that David gives his consent for me to find another Dom. In fact, i think to some degree he would like that very much so that he wouldn’t have to always be the enforcer and he would also get a break/relax while I am still held accountable. Any who, if/when i actually go meet either of them in person, i intend to ask David to allow me to wear the chastity belt. i do NOT want to be tempted to meet and fuck on the same day. … and that’s expansion for another day’s post… back to today…

Today i found a blog for the first time ever, of a chastity belt “armor” daily wearer. Until she stopped. Wendy Warrior wore chastity regularly, even did 30-day challenges to stay locked the ENTIRE time, and blogged about it.

i truly hate it that i only just found her, as her most recent/last post was to tell her readers she’s done with armor. No longer fascinated or desirous of it. i get it. We grow older and wiser and our interests change. None the less, i enjoyed reading her entire blog from the beginning to the end.

What i learned was that: 1) she mostly wore chastity overnight. Some people put on PJ’s, she put on armor. 2) she challenged herself to wear it 30-consecutive- days with no (or very extremely limited) breaks. 3) she did the challenge FOUR different times with four different belts with critiques of them along the way.

For most people, it would likely cause you to turn up your nose, or raise your eyebrows, ask “WHY” or maybe even literally run in the opposite direction! Not me. i am drawn closer to it! i am in awe of Wendy, but more enamored even yet of chastity! It inspired me even more. And i want more of it.

While i didn’t provide the specific site to David (i seriously don’t think he’d care to go read it anyways!), i did tell him about it.

By the way, he’s not entirely sure he understands my extreme interest in chastity either. But he supports me and wants me to be happy and if locking up my parts so i can’t touch them while giving him the key, so he can if he wants to, then he’s on board.

He’s so much on board that he has made a declaration now that i should start sleeping in chastity. And nothing else.

He’s known (for a long time!) that i am most turned on and “needy” for Sex just before sleep and shortly after waking up. i rarely sleep naked, and usually wear a shirt/shorts (or pants in the winter) combo because it (somewhat) limits my access and distracts me from the interest of playing with my sex. That’s apparently about to change!

Before now…. When we go to sleep, while we get in bed together we both read for a bit, and then David tends to be the one to actually fall asleep first. He knows i like to read (sex) blogs and erotica, and as i do, i tend to masturbate right beside him. Sometimes with permission, but admittedly sometimes without. (Not cool, but… yah know!).

And unfortunately, i must admit the truth to you…. i have had orgasms this way too. Yes, some with permission when he was awake, but some without. And even less pleasing, more shameful, i haven’t always told him the next day.

And then there’s the times that as i wake up, i am surprised to find my hand rubbing on my clit. It’s a half-awake effort, so i know i’ve never seriously done anything in my sleepiness. But….. i have learned i am quite aroused in the mornings and frequently at night as well.

After i told him about this girl and how she sleeps in chastity, he feels that would be good for me too.

Starting tonight, i am to sleep naked save wearing the chastity belt. i will put it on before he goes to sleep, and hand him the key so that i am not allowed to just escape ( or masturbate) any ole time i feel like it before sleep. And well, by default, then i will also be required to ask him to release me in the mornings. And even more by default, i won’t be allowed to play with myself with or without an orgasm.

i am excited about this. Today. But excitement is easy now as i am just thinking about it. But then as it goes on tonight …. And becomes my new reality…. by tomorrow …. Or the next day…. Or THE NEXT DAY….. i wonder how excited or good i’ll feel about it then. Maybe not so much.

It will be interesting to see if my fondness grows or dissipates. i wonder if i will (really) love it or come to hate it.

Only time will tell. i will keep you posted.

Btw – i have typically worn the belt during the day in/out of the house. While i have slept in it one other time, it hasn’t happened but once to date. That happened when i wore the belt a full 24-hours without being allowed release. And i loved it. Sleeping in it was of no major consequence and was no problem at all. While the metal is (obviously) rigid and unforgiving, when i turn over it did cause me to wake from my sleep, but like everything i suspect i will get used to it too and be more able to sleep right through those moments.

Honestly, wearing it at night seems more logical as a purposeful activity anyway. i mean, seriously, other than as a tangible reminder all day long, it’s not like i typically am going to be at work and rub one out at my desk. Nor in the car driving. Or shopping at the grocery store. Or any other public outing type place. (Of course, as mentioned above, if i were to actually go meet some other potential lover, i do think that would be a good time to wear it out. Until said person is vetted by myself, and especially approved by Sir, unnecessary distractions are…well… unnecessary!)

But at night, when my mind is less crowded with daily life, i read my smut, and get aroused…. THAT is the time that access needs to be limited. THAT is the time that i need to be reminded not to touch, and where it is SO easy to do so. THAT is the time that MY temptations need to be limited! So wearing it at night is the most logical for me to wear it, if we want to use it for purpose. Otherwise, daily wear is a-ok and sexually arousing too, but not exactly purposeful either.

In case you are wondering, i have NO idea how long this will last. i don’t know if this is a “for tonight only” or “until NO-vember is complete” or “why it’s forever of course!” i didn’t ask. Time will tell me what i need to know and the answer doesn’t matter as i’d do as instructed no matter what anyway. Hell, i may ask him if i can wear it more going forward too… which i can see as the most probable answer actually.

And… i think i’m gonna love it. i will keep you posted…..

i do think one day, if i do continue to love it, i’d like to work up to and challenge myself also to that 30-day challenge. (But if i get that far, i’m buying a top notch heavy duty $$$ one too! Like these MY-STEEL or maybe these FANCY STEEL. 🥰🥰🥰) .

UPDATE: i didn’t even have a chance to post this yet, and i find myself locked up. David and i had an amazing date night where i drank most of a bottle of wine all by myself. i got drunk. David approved.

When i get drunk, i get VERY turned on and i flirt heavily. i was (literally) humping David’s leg, hand, and on top of his pants … he didn’t allow me to actually have penetration. i heard him make statements like, “NO orgasm for you!” And “You better stop!” And “if you orgasm, you WILL regret it!” Admittedly, i was pushing the EDGE of acceptable. Not entirely sure WHY i did that. Ok, that’s a lie. i do know why. i was drunk, fucking hair you, REALLY wanting an Orgasm, and i was hoping if i got him aroused enough too he’d consent. i also think i may have wanted to test him. AND did i mention…. i really wanted to orgasm!

He indulged me for a bit, let me suck his cock, kiss his lips, and he fingered my pussy for a hot second (it was quite literally a SECOND. Enough for me to think, “oh hell yah, i have him turned on and he’s gonna let me orgasm.” And it was over! NOT long! And that’s when he said, “Now. Go. Get yourself ready for bed.”

Because he had already told me WAY earlier in the day i would now sleep in chastity, i KNEW when he said “get ready for bed,” those words were interchangeable for, “Now go get yourself locked up.”

As much as i didn’t want to stop trying to seduce him, i went and put on the belt. By the time i returned, he was already reading in our bed. He didn’t even look up but knowing my presence was near, he held up the palm of his hand.

i wasn’t dumb, i knew i had to hand him the key. As i placed it in his hand, his fingers curled up around it and slid his hand under the covers.

As i saw his hand disappear under cover, i asked what he was doing with his hand/key. He said,”don’t worry about it.” Which may as well have been code for, “it’s none of your business!”

After which, he said, “now go lay down and get ready for sleep.”

i won’t lie… it was at this moment that my alcohol high, along with my sexual attempts to get an O high m came to a screeching halt. Back to reality. NO-vember is still in full effect! And he was done indulging me.

We always read before sleeping. And that’s what he did, like every other night. Just prior to actually turning out the light to sleep, he asked me, “do you need the key?”

Because we’ve been together so long, i knew what that meant too. He meant, “Are you ok? “ and “Will you be ok?” To which i responded, “only if i can orgasm. Otherwise, I am good to have you keep it Sir.”

That’s when he turned out the light, and in the dark, i heard the words, “Ok, sleep well my love… MY good girl.”

And i said, “you too Sir.”

So.

Here i am.

Locked up. And he is sleeping beside me. And i find myself thinking of NOTHING other than: I WANT TO ORGASM! And yet, it ain’t gonna happen!

And while i truly DO want it that BAD, i won’t lie…. i’d be severely disappointed had he NOT made me put on the chastity belt AND give him the key AND denied me what i really want. He made statements that he was on board with NO-vember and that this is how i would sleep now…. And as i have mentioned before, i love it when he’s consistent and true to his word! So while i am disappointed i was not able to get what i wanted (orgasm), i did get what was promised (NO-vember and chastity belt and that makes me happy.

i did ask him before we officially stopped talking for the night if this would be the “new norm or just occasionally or just until the end of NO -vember.” His response, “I haven’t decided yet. Maybe it will be forever and only when i want to fuck you will i allow you to be unlocked!”

While we both know that’s not likely or maybe even possible (??), the idea of only being allowed out to be used for his pleasure is seriously arousing for me too!

What i do know: he’s serious about NO-vember. Dec 1 can’t get here fast enough!! Will he at least allow me to orgasm once on my birthday?? i turn 50 on Thanksgiving… 5-days before month end! And if he does, will the “month” start all over again?! i will have to pray about this… yes, i will literally be praying!”

So like Linus with his blue happiness blanket, i have a silver metal chastity belt happiness blanket that i too sleep with all snuggled up against me tightly. i love my blanket and the happiness it brings.

Hugs,

Marie

206 – Give it not one but TWO fingers!

Written by Marie on . Posted in My Dominant Sir. No Comments on 206 – Give it not one but TWO fingers!

** i wrote this at the end of the day of wearing the inflatable dildo, but didn’t post it as i wanted to sleep on it to re-read it and/or edit. So technically, this was the end of day yesterday now.

i came home from work today early. It was just Sir and i. Because i am SO turned on now from sexual teasing, i asked Sir, “Can we get naked and i ride your cock?”

He asked why. And i told him i NEED to feel his cock.

He responded with, “I would definitely agree that pussy is awfully needy. I see it has a need to be filled today. Of course, I thought we were taking care of that already. Maybe not enough. Strip off your clothes.”

i said “Yes Sir” and started toward the bedroom. He asked “where are you going? I said strip!”

i said, “oh, i thought i should do that in the bedroom.”

He rolled his eyes and said, “if I wanted you to leave my sight, I would’ve made that clear.”

So right there in the living room, i striped.

He smiled. He said, “I see you were a good girl and kept the dildo in its place today! Come here.”

i walked up close to the couch where he was. He grabbed the bulb and squeezed it many times, inflating it SO large that i felt the pressure of my vaginal wall muscles become very stretched to the limit.

He said, “So …filled …. your Pussy shall be!”

With that, he released the bulb and let it hang between my legs. Then he grabbed the base of the dildo and said, “Spread your legs.”

And i did. He said, “I do not think you need to feel my cock. Instead, close your eyes and just feel as this dildo in this very tight and filled oust, as it fucks you very thoroughly.”

With that, he proceeded to pull the dildo out very slowly and then pushed it back in as deep as it could go. He repeated this several times quite slowly and very intentionally as my tunnel became slick with every movement of the cock.

Soon he went faster and as he did, my knees buckled. He said, “you need to stand up straight. Do not move.”

i attempted to follow his directive, but soon failed. He was moving the cock in and out so rapidly, i just couldn’t handle the emotion i was feeling. i suddenly felt myself nearing the edge of orgasm and said, “Sir, may i cum please??”

That’s when he pulled the dildo out of my needy pussy and i felt his hand slap against my clit so quickly. It caused me to flinch and pull my legs together as i buckled over. While it stung a bit, it wasn’t that painful really so much much as surprised me. And in the surprise, the emotional high i felt evaporated in a blink of an eye!

He said, “No, of course you can’t orgasm! You set this NO-orgasm, NO-vember in motion and I’m loving it. This is fun!”

With that, he stood up from the couch, and he said, “open your mouth.”

When i did do, he inserted the inflatable cock into it. He said, “Now suck it clean.”

As i did as instructed, he continued to stalk, “As needy as this pussy is, I suspect it still needs to be filled and played with yet today. You need to stuff it full with your two middle fingers. Stick them in there now and don’t take them out until I authorize or indicate otherwise.”

i did as instructed.

He smiled as he cupped my chin and said, “Now that’s a pretty sight to see and now you are being a good girl. You are free to go about the rest of your day, as long as the fingers stay put until you are told otherwise. And once you’ve thoroughly cleaned the dildo, you may put it away too. Do I make myself clear?”

(i took the dildo out of my mouth to respond)

“Yes Sir.”

Then he kissed me deeply, and turned and left.

i picked up my clothes and started to move to our closet, where i was intending to put the work ones away and slide into the after-work-comfortable ones.

It was about that time that Sir walked back through the living room, when he did so, he looked at me. He stopped and said, “where are you going?”

“To our closest to find suitable clothing Sir” i said.

To which he responded, “there’s no need for clothing. You should stay naked the rest of the afternoon. I’d like to see you naked and stuffed this afternoon. Now go put your work clothes and the dildo away only.”

i responded with, “Yes Sir.”

When i was done, i sat….. naked…. On the couch…. Two fingers in my pussy…. And i grabbed the remote again to find a tv show with my free hand.

Sir sat down on the opposite couch and said, “Open your legs so I can see your pussy better as it’s filled with your fingers inside.”

And he added, “You know …. I love seeing you naked like this, all filled up. Let me see you finger fuck yourself now.”

i began to pull my fingers in and out slowly, being careful to not touch my clit anymore than was necessary so not to get too mentally involved but rather just carrying out the task at hand.

He turned up his nose though and said, “that doesn’t look like you are trying too hard. Take yourself to the edge with vigor.”

So i did. As i neared the edge, i arched my back and David saw. He said, “STOP! NOW!”

And i did that too. i pulled my fingers out and whimpered as i knew the orgasm wasn’t going to be allowed, there wasn’t much point in asking.

That’s when Sir said, “put your fingers back inside now. I never said they could be removed. That’s their resting place until further notice. You don’t need to use your left hand for anything else today.”

Then he finally smiled and said, “what a good girl you are! I’m having fun! Are you?”

i rolled my eyes and he laughed. That’s when he also said, “so what do we want to watch? Porn?”

🙄

It’s going to be a very long NO-vember month indeed.

Hugs,

Marie