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Tag: marriage

43 – Spanking gone wrong. :(

Written by Marie on . Posted in Punishment, Spanking, Submission. No Comments on 43 – Spanking gone wrong. :(

So i haven’t been here since September 2019 and it is now JANUARY 2020! Mainly because Sir and i got into a HUGE fight … my fault…. and we stopped doing D/s and DD altogether…….

Life was good. Mostly. But not entirely.

In my humble opinion, Sir was being lazy. He kept threatening to discipline, for true or believed transgressions, and then never did. He’d say, “Tonight after our (15-year old) son is not within ear shot, you will be spanked.” And then, “Oh, I’m too tired. Maybe tomorrow.” And tomorrow he’d forget, not care, say something like, “I’m sure you’ll do better today and let’s forget about it.” Of course, his laziness led to my rebelliousness. i’m blaming him now for being the start of it, but like everything in life, there’s no real start or finish so maybe it was me that started it so maybe i’m to blame?!?!

So i was irritated and felt rebellious…. i decided what i did (or didn’t do) didn’t matter. As there are no ‘real’ consequences.

And i got out my vibrator and decided to make myself happy. And i did. i left it out in plain sight, on purpose, daring him to say something. And he did. i was actually happy he did, because he wasn’t ignoring me or the behavior.

He asked me, “Why is this out?”

i said, “Because i used it.”

He said, “Did you cum? Without permission?”

And i said, “Yes”

And he said, “Why? You know all you had to do was ask and I’d have said yes.”

i said, “Because i knew you’d say yes, so i decided it didn’t matter if i asked or not, so i just did it.”

That’s when he said, “you’ll have to be spanked tonight.” (here we go again….)

i rolled my eyes and said, “Ok”. and went about my business.

i was mad for multiply reasons:

1) i think my point is valid – if he’s ALWAYS going to say yes, WHY ask?! What’s the point? and

2) And furthermore, what are the odds of him ACTUALLY following through on a spanking …. none!

So …. i was irritated.

To my complete shock, about 3 hours later, while watching football (His FAVORITE!!!!), he said, “it’s time to get a spanking,” and he laughed and smiled. i honestly thought he was joking because it was football season, a weekend, and he was watching the game.

So i didn’t move but just said, “oh, okay.” (knowing this basically was daring him to do something, but honestly believing he wouldn’t!)

That’s when he got mad and said, “NOW!” and he stood up, grabbed me up off the couch, and basically pulled me into the bedroom when he then (in an angry voice) said, “I shouldn’t have to miss MY game to discipline you! Nor should I have to tell you twice to move! And I shouldn’t have to force you in here! Don’t make me do this again!”

i knew he was serious so i dropped my pants and laid across the bed. But i was SO mad. i was thinking, “WHY NOW? Over an orgasm?! Seriously?! What about the time i did (fill in the blank) and that didn’t matter?!?” But all this was just in my head. i didn’t say this out loud of course.

With no preamble, he grabbed the wooden paddle and swung. HARD. It HURT. and then again. There was NO warm up… it was a “get the job done so I can get back to my game” type of event. And with every swing, i got madder yet!

On the third swing i was VERY mad. i felt he was being unreasonable. And i decided this whole lifestyle was stupid. i was getting spanked for cumming. (SERIOUSLY!?!?)

So i stood up, looked at him and said, “I’M DONE!” and walked to the closet to put on clothes.

He followed me in there and said, “NO you are NOT done! Get out here and into position!”

And i basically yelled, “NO!” and walked out.

He threw the paddle down and said, “FINE! NO MORE ANYTHING! GET RID OF ALL THE SEX TOYS AND EVERY DISCIPLINE INSTRUMENTS TODAY! WE ARE NOT DOING THIS ANYMORE! BECAUSE SHORT OF ABUSE, I CAN’T MAKE YOU DO THIS!”

And i yelled, “FINE!”

and with that…. we haven’t spoken about any of it since……Until….. 2 days ago, when i texted him a simple message that said, “i miss spanking.” and he responded with, “Me too.”

i’ll tell you more about what’s happened in between then and now … in the next post.

Hugs,

Marie

42 – Corset on. Bra Off. Check

Written by Marie on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on 42 – Corset on. Bra Off. Check

Thanks to @Implacable, i was asked if corset/ waist training was still a thing for me, especially given the braless recent rules in place too. So since i haven’t spoke about corset training lately, it made me realize i should.

We have gotten to a place with both corset and bras, that it is working. i’ve accepted both in my mind and body. And this level of submission with these two things has taken a very long time.

When i first started wearing corsets, it has always been understood it would be the under-the-breast kind. (Not sure what that is called). But NOT covering the breasts. So i wore a bra with it too. The point of it hasn’t necessarily been to create a sexy look, but to train the waist to be smaller, to cause the breasts to lift up (stick out) and the same with the ass. If you push the stuff to another place, it will eventually stay there. With training. Consistent and regular training. But it is good to take a break from it because otherwise, those muscles atrophy and you lose the purpose of it. Just like runners train a day (or two) and rest a day (or two), same concept here.

So i wear the corset on Mon-Tues-Wed. And the rest of the week off.

Likewise, i’ve finally convinced Sir to let me wear bras to work (mon-fri 8-5). But since he didn’t really want to compromise at all, we have compromised and said, “if the outfit of the day doesn’t matter, then no bra.” In other words, if i’m wearing something that it would be obvious (colors, shape/ fit), then bra is okay. Otherwise, no bra is expected.

Well, when you wear a corset, you can’t exactly wear a lot that is truly form fitting. Because the laces and fit of the corset will show through. So – Sir said “no bra”. Well, this was the first i’d done that but i reluctantly complied.

i actually found i liked the corset MORE without a bra than with!

That’s because it comes right up under my boobs and stops, right at the place where a bra starts. So the two fabrics coming together right at the same spot sometimes pinched. Or overlapped and stuck out. But when i only had one, it felt better.

Not to mention, my boobs just stuck right out there tall and proud.

But still, you can’t quite tell that THAT’s what’s happening because the outfit isn’t that tight fitting.

i will say i get a LOT of compliments – from women mostly – on days i wear the corset. They can’t figure out ‘why’ i look different, but they know ‘something’ is. They say stuff like, “Have you lost weight? You look great!” And i just say “Not really, but thank you.”. That’s NOT a lie….

i think my waist looks better when i have the corset on and even into Thurs-Fri it holds it’s forced form, but by Sunday it seems to have relaxed.

So more-than-not, i don’t wear a bra and 3 of those days i have a corset on.

i’m learning to like it. It has become a routine that i can rely on. i like being restrained by the corset and left free from the bra. My life is good and it makes Sir happy, which makes me happy!

Hugs,

Marie

39 – Domestic Discipline- in life

Written by Marie on . Posted in Deep Thoughts, Marriage, Submission. No Comments on 39 – Domestic Discipline- in life

For all you sex and spanking fans, this will be boring.

For all you Domestic Discipline fans, this might be insightful.

i know i mostly talk all about how our lifestyle revolves around “sex” and sex- related stuff. But it really isn’t just about that. It’s how our lifestyle is.

But i have come to realize that if i were in charge, things would be much stricter than they are. i’m not sure if Sir is just being a “good southern gentleman” or if he’s “shy” to take control or if he just doesn’t want to take control or maybe he just doesn’t think like me.

i asked him about this today and he said, “I don’t think you know what you are asking for.” But i think i do! i’m asking him to lead our marriage, to be the lead of our house, and ultimately me. In exchange, i respect, obey, and submit. In ALL things… sex and otherwise. Seems simple enough to me.

So here’s two examples of what happened just today …. i will tell you what happened AND what would have happened, had our roles been reversed.

Real life Example 1 – what did happen:

We like to play golf. Tomorrow we are going to play together. As of today, i have been braless for exactly one whole week. (Because i got my bras taken away last week when i didn’t have it off at 5:22 pm after work). And i TOLD David “i can’t play golf without a bra. It will hurt too much”

His response was, “hmm”.

Real life example 1 – what would’ve happened if our roles were reversed:

His response would’ve gone like this…. “excuse me? You have a rule that states ‘no bra when not mon-fri, 8-5, and tomorrow is a Saturday! So you have another thing coming if you think you can TELL me you are wearing one tomorrow! So you screwed up twice now… one by wanting to break a rule and two by telling me. Had you asked, I’d probably have understood your request and conceded. But now, you will absolutely NOT be wearing a bra! And maybe next time, you’ll think of how to word that to me in a way that is a respectful tone and in the form of a question with a ‘please Sir’ at the end. Do you understand me?”

And of course, i would be saying, “yes Sir, i am sorry Sir. i was clearly out of line Sir.”

And he would then respond with, “I’m not at all surprised to hear you apologize, but you will now be punished for your indiscretions. Get naked and assume the position.” (And prepare to be spanked, and to be followed up with standing in the corner for an indeterminable amount of time, until I decide otherwise!)

Real life example 2 – what did happen:

At 4:50, i got a text, “when home?” (And just to let YOU know …. today is a Friday and i NEVER work late on Friday’s. i truly believe i “have” to leave on time on Friday’s. i don’t know why, but i definitely have this “thing” about leaving on time on Friday’s).

So my response was, “10-minutes”.

Sir said, “ok, great. Can you stop and buy mozzarella cheese?”

Now the next thing you should know is that David cooks, and i clean. He was home cooking dinner when he sent those texts.

Real life example 2 – what would’ve happened if i were in charge:

“Because you WILL be leaving in 10-minutes, you need to stop to buy mozzarella cheese on the way home. Don’t forget.”

Now i don’t know about you, but the first example seems a bit more extreme to me than the second. But in both cases, i feel that i was disrespectful to Sir and he allowed it. i didn’t mean to be disrespectful, but like anyone, if allowed to do things inappropriate…. we do.

But just like a child, they need to be trained in the ways you want them to be. And if you allow them to treat you with dishonor, disrespect, and no submission at all…. well…. they won’t. And quite often, it becomes “who they are” and the way they do the things they do. And it becomes “normal.”

To a large degree, that’s how i am. We’ve been together for over 20-years (most of it married, but not all), and now, after finding DD only a year ago… my ways are dying hard. And David thinks i “don’t know what i’m really asking for”.

But i disagree with Sir. i think i know exactly what i am asking for and what i truly want. And i told him so too.

He responded with, “I’ll think about it. But you are not in control in the end!”

So we shall see.

Are you submissive? Have you asked for MORE? Did you regret it?

Hugs,

Marie

36 – Moment of truth – part 2

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So i left you hanging a bit in the last post and i thank YOU for commenting. i was impressed/surprised at how male or female D or s, the consensus was all the same: tell the truth and do it now, on my own, without being prompted.

i was surprised because i expected someone to say the opposite or at least a “maybe I wouldn’t tell” kind of response. But 100% said “The Truth Will Set You Free.”

And that’s what i did too.

i told the truth.

What were my motives? Well, i’m a terrible liar. Always have been. Even my Mom immediately knew i was lying as a kid. So there’s no point really!

But mainly, i did it because my conscience was holding me accountable. i mean, really, i agreed to submit and obey. That doesn’t mean “sometimes” or “when it fits my agenda”, but always. And part of submission is for him being able to trust me. And me putting all my trust in him, that even when i screw up, i know it will be ok in the end…. even if it means punishment to get to “the end” of the situation.

But remember, i was at work and he was at home. And we were texting. So i told him via text.

His response?

“Hmm”

Yikes! This won’t be good. i can’t wait to get home… or maybe i can!

Then… a few hours later, just before noon, he texts and says he is going out of town today (instead of tomorrow, which was the original planned flight and i already knew about). He will be gone for the next 4-days. And because he has to leave for the airport before i will be home from work, he will stop by the office on his way to the airport.

Now he didn’t say “why” he’d be by my office, but i knew he wouldn’t do any discipline there either. So i didn’t quite know what would happen now with respect to this transgression.

He came by and greeted everyone (my office has 15 people), kissed me, and whispered in my ear, “be good while I’m gone. You did good to tell the truth, but that doesn’t erase the transgression. But being good in these days ahead just might save your ass when I get back too.”

And off he went.

Now you would think i would’ve been on best behavior… nope, i wasn’t as good as i should’ve been.

Let me tell you what i first did. He has set a “no bra” rule (except mon-fri, 8-5) for me (read prior posts for details). And the next day was Friday. So i had on a bra to go to work. Then i needed to return a dress at the mall and went straight there after work.

At 5:22, i got a text from David that simply read, “Proof”.

i KNEW that meant i had to send a pic of myself right then showing no bra on. Not necessarily a topless pic, if whatever shirt i was wearing would reveal nipples enough to show no bra is on.

But i was at the mall. So i told him the truth. (It will set me free… right!?) i told him that i didn’t take it off when leaving work and so i couldn’t provide proof. (At this point, i’m thinking, “what kind of dumb ass am i? Am i wanting to be spanked?” Because it really seems like it!)

He again texted, “hmm”.

Well among a few smaller things, these were now the things that were landing my ass in hot water.

And he came home tonight. And what happened next was NOT what i thought would happen. At all.

i’ll leave you there for now. i’ll tell you about it in the next post.😋

Hugs,

Marie

35 – Moment of truth

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If you read my last post, it ended with me headed to bed with a plug in the butt. While i’ve worn them before, many times for many hours, i haven’t done it overnight. And i wasn’t too sure i could do it.

And i was right. i went to lay down at 10:00. i read in my book (ebook.. does anyone read paper books anymore at all??) for about 30-minutes, while being distracted the entire time and not able to really relax or get comfortable.

Wearing a butt plug while standing upright is a significantly different feeling than laying flat on a bed, on your back, on your side, or on your tummy. Ok, i take that back… not on the tummy. i’ve been in that position before… i mean anyone doing ass play has had “something” in that hole while on the tummy. (Wink, wink!)

But i digress. So… i put the tablet down and proceeded to try to ignore this butt plug and go to sleep. And the more i tried, the less it seemed to be working.

At midnight, i took melatonin. At 1, i took another. At 2, i gave up. i took it out.

Got in bed and within 10-minutes was sound asleep.

When i awoke, i dressed and went to work before David was even awake. (He slept in, i wasn’t avoiding him!). And about 30-minutes later, i got a text. It read, “well?”

Moment of truth.

At this point, i KNEW i could lie and say “oh yeah, it stayed in.” Or, i could have said, “no, it slipped out while i was sleeping.” Either way, he would have never known.

i mean really, he literally would N-E-V-E-R know ….. unless i tell him.

What would you have said??

Hugs,

Marie