For all you sex and spanking fans, this will be boring.
For all you Domestic Discipline fans, this might be insightful.
i know i mostly all about how our lifestyle revolves around “sex” and sex- related stuff. But it really isn’t just about that. It’s how our lifestyle is.
But i have come to realize that if i were in charge, things would be much stricter than they are. i’m not sure if Sir is just being a “good southern gentleman” or if he’s “shy” to take control or if he just doesn’t want to take control or maybe he just doesn’t think like me.
i asked him about this today and he said, “I don’t think you know what you are asking for.” But i think i do! i’m asking him to lead our marriage, to be the lead of our house, and ultimately me. In exchange, i respect, obey, and submit. In ALL things… sex and otherwise. Seems simple enough to me.
So here’s two examples of what happened just today …. i will tell you what happened AND what would have happened, had our roles been reversed.
Real life Example 1 – what did happen:
We like to play golf. Tomorrow we are going to play together. As of today, i have been braless for exactly one whole week. (Because i got my bras taken away last week when i didn’t have it off at 5:22 pm after work). And i TOLD David “i can’t play golf without a bra. It will hurt too much”
His response was, “hmm”.
Real life example 1 – what would’ve happened if our roles were reversed:
His response would’ve gone like this…. “excuse me? You have a rule that states ‘no bra when not mon-fri, 8-5, and tomorrow is a Saturday! So you have another thing coming if you think you can TELL me you are wearing one tomorrow! So you screwed up twice now… one by wanting to break a rule and two by telling me. Had you asked, I’d probably have understood your request and conceded. But now, you will absolutely NOT be wearing a bra! And maybe next time, you’ll think of how to word that to me in a way that is a respectful tone and in the firm of a question with a ‘please Sir’ at the end. Do you understand me?”
And of course, i would be saying, “yes Sir, i am sorry Sir. i was clearly out of line Sir.”
And he would then respond with, “I’m not at all surprised to hear you apologize, but you will now be punished for your indiscretions. Get naked and assume the position.” (And prepare to be spanked, and to be followed up with standing in the corner for an indeterminable amount of time, until I decide otherwise!)
Real life example 2 – what did happen:
At 4:50, i got a text, “when home?” (And you should know today is a Friday and i NEVER work late on Friday’s. i truly believe i “have” to leave on time on Friday’s. i don’t know why, but i definitely have this “thing” about leaving on time on Friday’s).
So my response was, “10-minutes”.
Sir said, “ok, great. Can you stop and buy mozzarella cheese?”
Now the next thing you would know is that David cooks, and i clean. He was home cooking dinner when he sent those texts.
Real life example 2 – what would’ve happened if i were in charge:
“Because you WILL be leaving in 10-minutes, you need to stop to buy mozzarella cheese on the way home. Don’t forget.”
Now i don’t know about you, but the first example seems a bit more extreme to me than the second. But in both cases, i feel that i was disrespectful to Sir and he allowed it. i didn’t mean to be disrespectful, but like anyone, if allowed to do things inappropriate…. we do.
But just like a child, they need to be trained in the ways you want them to be. And if you allow them to treat you with dishonor, disrespect, and no submission at all…. well…. they won’t. And quite often, it becomes “who they are” and the way they do the things they do. And it becomes “normal”
To a large degree, that’s how i am. We’ve been together for over 20-years (most of it married, but not all), and now, after finding DD only a year ago… my ways are dying hard. And David thinks i “don’t know what i’m really asking for”.
But i disagree with Sir. i think i know exactly what i am asking for and what i truly want. And i told him so too.
He responded with, “I’ll think about it. But you are not in control in the end!”
So we shall see.
Are you submissive? Have you asked for MORE? Did you regret it?