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288 – Caning discipline – (partial) Fiction

So this first part is true. The consequences thereof is what i have made up in my head, as i wait to see what, if anything, will come of it….

The guilt was starting to eat me up. So i decided to tell David, via text, to clear my conscience. Of course, i waited until he was away from the house to tell him. i didn’t do that on purpose really, or… maybe on some level i did.

The text read, “I’m not sure if you care or not, but I’ve orgasmed twice this week without permission. Once was on my birthday and then again yesterday too.”

What i didn’t say was, “and i am telling you now instead of doing what i really want to do, which is orgasm again. Right Now! Because i really am feeling very guilty now.”

The text i got back was, “WHY would you do that??????”

The response was simple… and true. i said, “Because i was selfish.”

What i didn’t add was that, “while i expect that had i asked you, you would have said yes… or…. you’d probably even have done participated and done for me. But i didn’t want that. i wanted ME. i truly was being VERY selfish!”

And the response i received was, “I’d have done it for you. It was your bday.”

i asked, “does it matter that i did it without your help? Or your permission ?”

“YES it does!”

And this is where i thought, “Ugh. You knew this was going to be the result. Now you’ll be punished. Why’d you go and be so stupid? You KNEW it was wrong. It wasn’t even that great of an O because you felt guilty even then!”

My head thoughts continued….. “And honestly…. You deserve whatever he provides. And you need to be prepared to thank him for it too.”

In my head i continued even more…… “You need to be grateful you have a husband who cares enough to want to be the one who provides your happiness, that he wants to see your joy when you orgasm, and … now… he also cares enough to discipline you for bad behavior too.”

And that’s where my head started venturing into the what-if scenarios about what kind of punishment would be fitting …….. fiction starts here….

After a bit more time of anxious anticipation, I received a new text from David. It said, “As you know today is Sunday, and I am already at church (for the tech team support David serves on). When you come to church, you need to have your belt on. You need to come find me and lay the key in my hand. It seems you need to have restriction enforced more again. But make no mistake, your discipline doesn’t stop there.”

“Yes Sir.”

And I did as instructed.

After church, we went to lunch with our son and he got on the road to head back to college from there and we went back home.

David beat me home and when I walked in the house, he was standing right there by the door waiting. He said, “Strip. You will not be wearing clothes the rest of the day.”

“Yes Sir.”

And I did as instructed.

That’s when he looked me up and down, and he smiled. He kissed the top of my forehead and said, “that’s my good girl.”

He produced the key to my belt and removed it. It dropped to the floor with the loud clang of metal that you’d expect.

He told me to “Go lay on the couch on your back. And wait for me.”

“Yes Sir.”

He walked through the living room and into our bedroom. I didn’t dare touch myself while he was gone. I wasn’t too sure what was going to happen next, but I wasn’t going to make it worse than it already was either.

When he came back into the living room he had changed clothes. And he held the leather cane in his hand too. Cringe. The cane is so torturous. He only uses it on me for the most egregious of errors and to drive home the discipline. It works every time.

He came and stood beside the couch that I lay on. As he towered over me, he looked down into my eyes and said, “You are the most beautiful wife when you lay naked like this. I like what I see. Unfortunately, that’s not quite what we are here for. Do you agree you’ve been disrespectful toward me lately?”

“Yes Sir.”

“Do you understand that it hurts my soul to think you don’t want to spend time with me, to allow your pleasure to come from me, to share your body and soul with me? You’ve shut me out by being selfish and taking orgasms that don’t belong to you. I consider it acts of infidelity when you touch yourself and bring yourself pleasure without me there or my permission to do so. But you knew all this, didn’t you?”

I started to feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I was choking back the emotions when I barely got out the words, “Yes Sir.”

He continued, “if you insist on making bad choices, then you will learn the true pain that you’ve caused me. Open your legs. And be still.”

Ahh, here it comes.

I saw his arm move up, the cane went up with his hand. Then I heard the whipping sound the cane makes when it cuts through the air. Immediately afterward, I felt the sting it leaves when it collided with my skin.

While I fully expected to feel it on my clit, I did not feel it there. Instead, it was on my lower abdomen. I immediately pulled myself into a fetal ball like position, but managed to stay flat on my back. I heard the words, “I said lay still. Now open your legs to me once again.”

And I did as instructed.

Tears started to fall from my eyes and down the sides of my cheeks, onto the couch cushion. I wasn’t crying from the pain, but rather the disappointment I had created for my Sir and in myself too.

I saw the cane move up and backward with his hand, and I closed my eyes. I held my breath and waited for it to fall on my skin to make its mark. It came down a little lower on my abdomen this time, but substantially in the same area. And then it happened again but lower yet. He was making his way down to my pussy. I could tell what was coming soon. I was anticipating the pain as I felt the next swat of the cane hit the top of my pubic mons area.

He paused and said, “do you think you deserve this punishment my love?”

“Yes Sir. I wish I didn’t, but I know I do.”

He said, “good. Now open your eyes and look at me.”

I did as instructed.

“I love you so much that it pains me when you take pleasure from me. That’s why you have to learn that this pussy and all the love it has to give belongs to me. ALL the time.”

He continued, “So I am about to deliver five hard strikes of the cane to this disobedient pussy to remind you of the way you are to act. Do you accept this punishment willingly?”

“Yes Sir, I do accept your discipline freely and fully.”

“Good. Now don’t move at all as I intend to deliver these swats in succession. If you move at all or restrict my access, I will start over. You don’t want that, now do you?”

“No Sir.”

“Good. Now lay still.”

And with that, he began just as promised, the first hard swat of the cane directly onto my pussy. He hit the left labia, and the intensity to my most sensitive area surprised me and I flinched. I cringed. I prayed he didn’t notice. But of course, he did.

He stopped and I heard, “tsk tsk tsk. Did I make myself clear about how you were to act?”

“Yes Sir. It just surprised me so I involuntarily flinched.”

“Well, I suppose you now know what to expect and that won’t happen again. Let’s begin again, shall we?”

He didn’t wait for my response, thankfully, as I felt the cane collide with the right labia. I successfully didn’t move. And I felt the left labia get hit again. It stung even more now with the second time leaving it’s hard mark on top of the first. I felt the cane repeat to the right side then too.

I heard my thoughts, “Three more to go. I can do this. Accept this punishment with grace, as you know you deserve.”

That’s when I felt the next caning swat land directly on my clit. It stung so damn bad but I was determined to accept it by laying still. I didn’t want Sir to start over. In another second of time, I felt another sting directly onto my clit again. I didn’t expect two in a row to land directly to my most sensitive spot.

Just one more to go, and I suspected it would be delivered with the most intensity yet. Sir did not disappoint.

The last one was also delivered as a direct hit to the middle of my pussy, straight onto my clit, with more intensity than any of the previous ones. It stung so bad bad that I felt the heat roll up into my cheeks and the tears flowed out freely from my eyes.

Through a haggard breath and tears, I eked out the words, “Thank You Sir.”

That’s when he dropped to his knees and the cane was laid aside. He kissed my lips fully and when he pulled away he said, “THAT was the pain part. Now for the pleasure part.”

He moved down on the couch where he got between my legs. It was just another second until I felt his warm tongue soothingly loving on my clit, pressing away all the pain and bringing about only pleasure. It felt so wonderful that my pussy started leaking fluids immediately.

He lifted his head and spoke to me saying, “You will not orgasm today at all. I will take my pleasure now and because you previously took your pleasure without permission, you will not have that ultimate release today at all.”

“Yes Sir. Thank you Sir.”

His tongue worked its magic. I felt him press his whole mouth around my clit, creating a suction on it and slightly pulling at it where it swelled up in response. My jagged breath and moans of pleasure was starting to tell my Sir just how turned on I really was becoming. As I arched my back and started to beg Sir to stop (or else let me orgasm), he immediately pulled his lips away and said very sternly, “NO! You will NOT orgasm!” His hand simultaneously gave my clit a hard slap, telling it to stop seeking pleasure and to remember the place it’s earned.

He waited a hot second and started again. He brought me to the edge of orgasm three more times, taking his pleasure in teasing me while licking my juices up in full but never allowing me to go over the edge.

After four total times of this, I was beyond sexually frustrated and David knew it. He didn’t care. In fact, he reveled in it as he spoke, “being frustrated isn’t too good for you is it?”

“No Sir.”

“Maybe next time you’ll think twice before taking your pleasure without permission.”

Oh I definitely will not be orgasming without permission again for a very long time to come!

And with that, he pulled entirely away from me and stood up. He grabbed my hand to help pull me up to my feet too. Then he said, “Now then. Because I don’t trust yo to be unbelted, you need to go get your belt back on. Snap the lock and bring me the key.”

And I did as instructed.

As I laid the key in his hand he smiled. Then he spoke saying, “I’ll keep the key on me and at the top of every odd hour for the remainder of the day, present yourself to me. You’ll need to ask me to bring you to the edge again and again. Make no mistake, I have zero intention of allowing you to orgasm today but instead making you beg for your release. You’ll learn to ask and receive permission before taking orgasms in the future.”

“Yes Sir. Thank you Sir for loving me enough to met out much needed discipline. I love you Sir and hope to do better by you.”

“You are most welcome my love. While all is indeed now forgiven, make no mistake that the rest of the day is reinforcing the lessons you’ve learned today AND you should plan to be in the belt for a good long time to come as you’ve now lost unbelted, unsupervised, time too.”

“I understand Sir.” I didn’t ask how long the belt would be on, as I knew the question wouldn’t be answered. It was irrelevant.

And he finally finished with, “but right now, I am so turned on and wound up that I think I need to orgasm myself. Get on your knees and prepare to receive my cum.”

And I did as instructed once more.

The end.

Hugs,

Marie

283 – “Your shoes aren’t a symbol”

chastity belt = safety

^^^^^ THAT was my conversation earlier tonight with my Sir. About my Chastity belt. And me wanting to have the key to take it off.

i won’t lie, i basically threw a temper tantrum today. i wanted the belt off. i lost. The belt is still on.

Sir won.

Officially he should always win. Unofficially it doesn’t always happen. Today it did happen.

Yes, today…. SIR WON! i know i already said that, but it was worth repeating.

i even looked for the key in all the areas i thought it would be. i really wasn’t sure as i looked if:

1) i was going to be able to find it,

2) if i did find it, would i actually use it,

3) if i wouldn’t use it, why was i looking.

i stopped looking. i don’t think i do want to find it. And it was not in any of those usual or expected places anyway.

Sir hid it well. He won there too.

He’s right in that the belt isn’t uncomfortable really, just getting (more and more) annoying. The way keeping my shoes on when i get home is annoying. But he is right, my shoes are not a symbol. The chastity belt is.

The chastity belt represents a literal and real power exchange. A total power exchange that i have willing done without regret. i would do it again too.

i completely trust my Sir and i give him my all. Until i want the belt off. Until i want to take back the control but to which he does not allow.

i am glad he has not succumbed to my wishes.

In the end, i do NOT want to be in charge and i am glad Sir is. Just sometimes, i want to win. Like today when i have wanted the belt off.

He’s home tomorrow at about this time (7p) but now (based on his comments above), i am unsure if the belt will even come off then.

This is good for me in the end. This total power exchange reminds me of how small i am and how small i should remain.

i write all this while sitting on the couch, in my chastity belt. i have given up asking for it to come off and will submit the way i should. Hopefully anyway! And if i don’t, i suspect i will still be in my belt but then ALSO have a red ass to go with it!

(And did you see the part about my fiction story? i am working on another one. Maybe tonight yet … or tomorrow. Will see.)

Hugs,

Marie

282 – Back in Belt; Control is not mine

chastity belt

David went to Florida for work today through Wednesday night for work. Again, he’s traveling. He has had to travel a lot lately.

His travel goes in streaks and this is one of them. i hate it, but of course, i can’t change it. i think he’s okay with it though. He rather likes traveling overall, which works well for someone who has to do it a lot like he has had to lately.

He left at 5am this morning, on Monday and he returns at 8pm on Wednesday night. A total of nearly 60-hours.

And this time, like many of the previous times David is out of town, i am back in my chastity belt.

This time, unlike some of the other previous times, i do NOT have the key.

i have no idea where it is, other than, “in our house,” which isn’t enough to be able to find it.

i don’t have the key because i needed to have some control taken away. In short, i had a privilege taken away.

As of late, we haven’t totally been on-point. We haven’t been totally off-point either. But, like anything not totally cared for properly, it starts to deteriorate. David hasn’t done maintenance spankings in awhile now, and i think he should have but i haven’t told him that. Instead, i have slowly and unintentionally become a bossy-little-brat-wife.

That led up to David getting so mad on Saturday he yelled at me. i probably deserved (some) of it, but some of it, i did not. When he yelled at me, i got incredibly angry. But. i didn’t say a word. Not-A-Single-Word!

In the past, when he’d get mad and yell, i would yell back. But now, i do not. While i could speak my concerns, “speak” is the key word. And because i was ANGRY i knew there was no way i would speak!

At the end of his yelling, he told me if i had a lot more to say (my mouth was what got me in trouble in the first place!) about the topic, i could walk home. You have NO idea just how close i was to doing it! Talking AND walking.

In the past, i would have challenged his words and called his bluff. i would have demanded to get out of the car and started walking. The dumb thing is that would only hurt myself and does nothing for or to him. And in the D/s world i live in now, Sir would actually let me out and i would be walking. Maybe not the entire way, but enough to wish i hadn’t been so stupid too. Because now, David (almost always) says what he means and means what he says.

So i sat in the vehicle in silence. Complete silence.

After about 10’ish minutes he asked me, “are you good?”

i wasn’t entirely sure i was, but i said i was. After i said that and thought about it more, i started to tell him i was NOT ok. But what was i going to say after that, that would make any difference whatsoever. i asked myself, “What can be said that would make a positive difference? What can i say that would end well?”

i couldn’t think of a single thing.

i also couldn’t think of a logical answer to the questions, “if you weren’t ok, then WHY did you say you were? Did you lie to me??”

So i continued to be silent.

After a bit of more silence, i really did become “ok.” And we began the trek to both being back to normal. Not long thereafter, we were indeed ok.

Yesterday (Sunday) when i was talking with David, i asked him why he got so mad and why he yelled at me. i also asked him why he allowed it to get that bad. His answer was simple, “laziness.”

Now today he went out of town and said he was hiding the key because control was something i had a little too much of lately and we needed to get him (not me) back into the proper position of control he so rightfully deserves.

i was a-ok with that. The belt went on, the lock snapped shut, and the key laid in his hand and then it went away.

Shortly thereafter Sir leaned in, kissed me goodbye, and he left.

It took all of an hour and i was ready to be out. Not because i needed it, but because i wanted it.

i wanted the control back. But i shouldn’t have it and it’s good that i don’t. This is good for both of us.

60-total-hours and counting.

Hugs,

Marie

279 – “You are in charge”

On a whim, we decided to drive up to see our son at his University. It’s Saturday and we didn’t have anything else planned, and neither did our son. We left early, spent the day, and i wrote this now as we are in the car heading home. His University is a 2 1/2 hour drive each way. Not too far, but not too close either.

We are making this trip all in one day.

Our son was happy to see us and we had a good family day. Our son (like most men), wouldn’t actually have admitted that he was lonely and missing us, but as his Momma, i could tell from the way he was talking to me that he was.

We had a good day. My heart is feeling full! (Although almost as instantly, as we leave to go home, a part of me is missing again and i wish i didn’t have to leave him there too! So maybe my heart isn’t “quite” full!!)

Our son really has NO idea of our D/s dynamic at all, which is by design. i suppose he knows i defer to Dad and Dad’s decisions, but he has NO idea of our discipline factor. While in my opinion, it’s good that he knows Dad is in charge and i defer to Dad, our son does NOT need to have a full account of what happens if or when i do NOT properly defer. In other words, our son doesn’t know Dad spanks me.

It’s hard to explain domestic discipline (DD) to grown adults, let alone to an 18-year old kid! i suspect our son would never understand or believe that i truly do consent to being spanked and that this is NOT some warped version of some sort of wife-beating.

David and i tend to have covert comments between us, said in front of our son, that if our son thought about it too much he might figure things out. But i highly doubt it.

As we didn’t have a plan for exactly what we would do, David said early this morning (after we were with our son), “you are in charge today. You can decide what we do.”

Then as i said, “ok Dad, next thing we are going to do is xyz. Let’s go!” David then said, “you are bossy today!”

And i said, “you said i was in charge.”

To which David responded back, “yes, but you can say things in a kinder tone.”

“Why do i need to? If i am in charge….”

“Well, you can do what you want, and use your power the way you see fit, but you may regret that later too.”

Ok, i hear you Sir. i can make decisions but still need to tone it down.

And some time later i heard, “you may have forgotten that you ought to speak a little kinder.”

Another warning. i heeded the warnings and this time, i did tone it down.

i don’t mean to get bossy. i just hate standing around going, “what do you think?”

And then hearing, “I don’t know. What do you think?”

To be followed by, “yah, I’m flexible and I don’t care.”

“And I don’t either.”

“So what are we going to do?”

“I don’t know”

STOP. I WILL DECIDE! This is stupid to go back and forth without moving forward in any way whatsoever!

And that’s when i tend to get bossy.

In my opinion, if you want to be in charge, and make the decisions, i will let you do it every time.

BUT.

When you put me in charge and you don’t want to make decisions…. Then “being bossy” comes with the territory! It’s what you was implied when you said “You are in charge.” To me, that means “you need to decide and just tell us what we need to do.” Aka: bossy!

So. Yes. i got bossy. But not because i necessarily intended to, but instead because of the authority was given to me.

Needless to say, i did manage to simmer down and find a “nice” way to give directions. And we had a great family-together-Saturday today.

i won’t be spanked or disciplined in any way for my bossiness. Yah for me! And we now travel home to see what tomorrow and the coming week holds.

(And i am mostly full of happiness, love, and joy…. But i have to say “mostly” because i had to leave my son behind. i wonder if this leaving part ever gets easier!)

Now i have to sit and stare out of the car front windshield for another 2-hours til we are home…. And to NOT dwell on missing my son already or that my bossy day has come to an end.

Hugs,

Marie

274 – Locktober, Sir’s way.

On Sunday, after we arrived back home from visiting our son, David spared me the spanking. i assumed my fate was sealed, but i was wrong. Thank heaven!

MOST of the time, i crave consistency. i need to know that what he says, he means AND what he means, he says. But this was one time that i really had NO desire to be punished. i mean, i would’ve accepted it, but i didn’t think a punishment was exactly warranted. i was trying to make progress with a bunch of noncommittal people, and i responded with annoyance to David’s questions. (Okay, so when i summarize the whole event like this, it does feel like i needed to be punished. Hmm.).

Well, i wasn’t punished. And i was very grateful.

Instead, we had every desire to relax and enjoy the evening. That’s what we did too. We watched tv for awhile, then went to our bed where David played with me and gave me 2-orgasms. Then he said i could play with myself as much as i wanted. i was shocked. i can’t remember a time where he allowed that!

But after a long weekend AND 2-orgasms already, i was relaxed, comfortable, and getting tired. Of course, i did orgasm one more time though too! (Wink wink!)

There was a time where masturbating right beside David while he read his book would’ve been weird for me. Now, i love it. i have learned to have an open mind, body, and soul for him. What’s mine is his, including the right to see me pleasure myself. And make no mistake, even though he was reading his book, he was also watching me! And i know he enjoyed watching and i enjoyed knowing he was watching too.

It wasn’t long afterward and we fell asleep. i sleep naked. David does not. While i am available to him at all times, he’s not always available to me. That’s ok by me too. In fact, in a very tangible way, it establishes that he is entitled to do as he pleases and i am entitled to also do (only) as he pleases too. Not only do i accept that, but it turns me on. i like submitting and being his in every way.

Then came the morning. i showered and started to dress when the directive came to lock it up.

David was going to play golf and because i had opted to work from home, he didn’t want me home alone to sit and play with myself anymore. It was “time to start Locktober anyway.”

So the chastity belt went on, the lock went shut, and the key went away.

That is how my Monday started. That evening, i (jokingly) asked David if he wanted to produce the key and he said, “uh, no.” with a “that was a dumb question” kinda tone.

Then he added, “you don’t need out yet. You don’t need to orgasm and it’s not the end of October.”

i won’t lie, i like wearing the belt when it’s MY idea and i am my own key holder. As in, i can get out anytime i want. Not too big a fan when i have zero control. But i am learning to accept it with mixed emotions. i WANT to accept it as a submissive wife, but the stubborn independent woman i can be does not like this one bit.

It’s not that i needed out. It was that i had the choice taken away. And while this is exactly how it should be, i didn’t like it. Wisely though, i said nothing out loud.

He reached his hand down between my legs and felt the belt. Sir said, “I could cut myself on those sharp groves. No orgasm for you! I best move my hand away before I hurt myself.” And he started to laugh.

The belt has holes where urine can pass but it is a jagged edge there, on purpose, to avoid any attempts to do anything more. Even though if you wanted to try something, the holes aren’t big enough anyway. Still. Getting a finger caught on the jagged edge would be painful for sure.

i was let out on Tuesday morning to go walking and shower. As soon as that was done, i asked Sir, “should i assume the belt goes back on unless told otherwise?”

i fully expected to hear another response like this was a dumb question and the words, “yes, of course it goes back on,” but to my surprise he said, “No, leave it off.”

i didn’t understand and i wasn’t sure how i felt about it. It felt like a privilege to be out, but also somehow “against the rules” (of Locktober.). And yes, of course i realize how contradictory i am being. First i didn’t want in, and not i don’t want out. i guess most of my issue is about the lack of control…. Physically AND mentally. i have no ability to control the lock on the belt anymore than i can control my anticipation about it also. i can’t even plan for in belt or out of belt.

That’s when i realized David makes his own rules and those are the ones that i follow and that’s the rules that matter! i need to adjust my thinking to just accept his authority and decisions as they come and be prepared for whatever decision he makes at that time, instead of trying to control anything at all, including my mindset.

Not much else was said the rest of Tuesday about the belt, Locktober, or orgasms. Tuesday was uneventful and almost disappointing.

Until this morning when David told me he is going out of town from Thursday (tomorrow) to Sunday, and he fully intends to lock me up. Oh wow. i have not been locked for 4-consecutive days and nights without a break at all.

Now you’d think that this wouldn’t be a big deal. i only last week tried to talk David into the whole month of October, so how is 4-days a big deal?! (Not to mention the fact he is telling me 24-hours in advance, so i have plenty of time to adjust my mindset!). Well….. it shouldn’t be.

But it is.

It is because i had “negotiated” that i could be out for showers and walks and he had said he liked to see me orgasm, so i wouldn’t (probably) be locked in for extended periods. But now, i will be.

While i was processing this, i went to work. i decided to text David, “so do you think i can go the duration without begging to be out of the belt?”

“Nope!”

“Will you give me the key then?”

“Maybe. Depends on what you say is the reason for needing it.”

i continued to ask questions. “What if it’s just because i am cranky and want out, so i want the key?”

“Really?”

“Okay, so i should assume that would be a no?”

“Correct.”

And i continued further…. “What if i get so cranky that i just start to bug the crap out of you to give me the key?”

“Then you’ll regret pissing me off like that.”

Okay, so i should have stopped but i didn’t. “What if i just don’t fully lock the lock? You never check. You just believe me that i did it.”

“Sounds like you are testing me. If I have to lock the lock myself before I leave, I will. But do I have reason to believe you’ll lie to me?!”

“No Sir. i haven’t lied. But i could…. OR …. Instead of being deceitful, i could just refuse to be in the belt and locked up altogether.”

“You could. But you won’t.”

“What makes you so sure i won’t refuse??”

“Because the alternatives to NOT being locked up while I’m gone are probably worse than being locked up.”

“You wouldn’t be that mean to me, Sir. Would you??”

“Wanna try me?”

“Hmm. No Sir. Probably not a wise move on my part.”

“First smart thing you’ve said in most of this conversation. Either way, tomorrow morning, you have a choice to make now… get locked in by me where I’ll check the lock myself, or face the alternative consequences.”

Locktober may not be a constant and consecutive 31-days, but one thing is for sure, i have to learn to cope without having the key or control better! And be prepared for 4-consecutive days about to commence in chastity.

Off to enjoy my last free night for awhile.

Hugs,

Marie