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47 – Submission is easy… until it’s not

Written by Marie on . Posted in Chastity Belt, Domestic Discipline, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Denial, Punishment, Spanking, Submission, Submissive Wife, Wife Spanking. No Comments on 47 – Submission is easy… until it’s not

Most days, submission is easy. Some days…. not so.

SUBMISSION – it isn’t a difficult concept really.

RULES = FOLLOWED = REWARDS

RULES = NOT FOLLOWED = PUNISHMENTS

And the rules i have, just really aren’t a big deal. i mean, David is fair and reasonable. And he doesn’t demand much. In fact, if i were in charge, i’d have more rules and require more compliance… but that would lead to bigger rewards and especially more punishment too!

But i think, in some sense anyway, because David is sooooo very reasonable, i probably use that to my advantage. i don’t exactly think this through mind you. It’s not like, i’m over here going, “Hey, let me take advantage of Sir to my benefit and get what i want under the guise of submission.” i’m NOT thinking that what-so-ever! But maybe, on some level, that may be kinda-sorta-what’s happening – i dunno?!?!?!

So what am i specifically rambling about?!? Okay – here’s the message of the day….

David had to go out of the country for work for almost a week. And where we was at, is/ was 7 hours ahead of me. i tend to get sexually wound-up in the evenings, which was in the middle of the night where he was. i have a “RULE OF SUBMISSION” to ask permission to masturbate and orgasm. But HOW can i do that when he’s sleeping?!

Okay, you probably know what happened…..

Y-E-S – okay, i did it! Without permission. Twice. Okay, so maybe once was a ‘oops, i should have asked’ but the second time…. no excuse, right? well…… i happen to agree. But i felt like i ‘needed‘ it. There are times when i feel like i just HAVE to cum….RIGHT….NOW. And i don’t know how to control that. And when i couldn’t ask… well… i just let things happen. uncontrollable.

And the day before David came home, i confessed. He said very little. When i asked about what he was thinking or why he hadn’t said anything, his response was, “There’s nothing I can do from here. And when I get home, I will deal with this. Until then, we will not discuss it.”

Yikes.

Okay, i deserve it.

When he got home… my ass was turned VERY RED. i got a spanking that hurt-like-hell. We do have yellow (slow down) and red (STOP) emergency words, but i have NEVER used either one and i have ZERO plans to EVER do so. i figure if i ever get close to that trouble, i will use it, but honestly, i deserve the punishment at the time i get it. Because, again, i don’t really get into trouble much and when i do get in trouble, David is very reasonable. And again, i’d be much more harsh than he is if i were in control.

He made me stand in the corner. Naked. And wait.

And wait.

And when he came to the bedroom, he said, “Assume the position”. Which means i stand with feet on the floor, hands on the bed, and ready to be spanked. i did.

He got the paddle out. i could hear it. i cringed. But he couldn’t see my face because he’s behind me. And yet, i’m accepting. i know this is going to hurt.

And he hits my ass about 10 x’s all over. Warm up. Already it hurts and this is JUST a warm up.

And then he pulls back and paused. i cringed more as i knew it was about to start.

S-M-A-C-K. WOW. It came hard.

Again, and again and again. And it happened so many times i lost count. He doesn’t make me count. But i do. Somewhere around 25 i lost complete count and had to focus on not saying yellow. i didn’t want to say that at all. i knew it was earned fair-and-square.

And finally, when tears were in my eyes, he stopped.

When he asked me if i was regretting my actions, i had to stop and think. i knew the right answer was ‘yes’ and in THIs moment i was…..but frankly, when i get horny and feel like i’m not in control of my emotions, i would do it again. And again. Without asking. So i told him that i want to be regretful, but i don’t know that i am.

David decided that if i can’t help myself, maybe i need to be helped.

There’s preventative and detective type of punishment. Detective is after the fact getting punished. And then there’s preventative, as in, can’t get in trouble if you aren’t in that position in the first place.

So …. David told me i need preventative help…..

And now we are investigating and looking into locking female chastity belts. i am equally excited and fearful of this.

But so far – the ones we’ve found are SO DAMN EXPENSIVE! (HOLY CRAP!!!).

Anyone use or wear or buy these? Any you’d recommend? That are effective AND price-conscious?!

40 – Golf… Topless

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Okay, not R-E-A-L-L-Y topless… but it definitely WAS braless. While Sir didn’t say i HAD to be braless…. i decided to try it. Of my own accord.

David and i play golf together. He taught me how to play when we were dating, almost 20 years ago now. And while i love it, i don’t have much time for it. In fact, for the last several years, i have a multitude of reasons (excuses) not to play. But today, Sir said, “You WILL go play with me and some of my friends.”

He told his friends that he “told” me i was playing.. and frankly, he did. And they laughed and said, “yeah, and she probably likes getting spanked too!”.

How ironic … and little do they know!!! Ha! Maybe Sir told them. i dunno. It’s quite alright if he did. They probably think it’s just a kink. And of course, it is that… but it’s MORE than that. It’s our lifestyle! i somehow think every man dreams of a submissive wife that they can spank, make suck their cock, and get to walk around naked whenever they want….. okay, maybe that’s another post. Back to this one now…..

So the rule in fact for me is officially “no bra unless mon-fri, 8-5” (Work). But a week ago, i wasn’t good and didn’t adhere to that rule and got my bras taken away from me. i couldv’e gotten them back as of yesterday, but i didn’t ask and Sir didn’t offer. So i let it go.

And today, i wanted to ‘see’ what it would look and feel like. So i went braless. (my previous post tells you that if i were in charge, i would have MADE me go braless… check it out!)

Now maybe my boobs are just extra firm or extra in shape or not sensitive – but – it didn’t really seem that much different! Truthfully, i was a bit disappointed! If i’d had on pasties – you’d NEVER have known! (Of course, Sir’s friends probably loved seeing the nipples show through and having NO pasties in place- and i kinda think David did too, which made me love it too!!).

And you may be thinking, “Oh her boobs must be small.” NOPE. 38D is my size. So i’m NOT small. Not ginormous, but definitely NOT small.

So as of yesterday i’ve been without a bra for 7-consecutive days and today makes Day 8.

i’m beginning to think this is going to be my ‘new normal’. And i think that makes Sir happy. i haven’t asked for them back. Not even sure i want them back. Going out of the house braless isn’t even something i really think about now. i ….. “just do it”. (am i supposed to get Nike’s approval to say that? Well… you aren’t paying me, so i’m rolling with it! LOL).

Maybe i DO like braless-ness in the end. i did, then i didn’t, and now i do again. i think the bra is a security blanket of sorts for me. It allowed my breasts (specifically NIPPLES) to hide!

i’m officially braless 24/7 now and frankly, it feels liberating, freeing, and good! i may just adopt this permanently. Maybe there IS something to the “braless movement” afterall. And i wouldn’t have EVER given it a second thought if Sir hadn’t made me.

See – submission really IS a good thing!

(and on another note…. Sir and his friends are rather sassy on the golf course to one another. And since i was with them… i was too . i mean really, ‘when in Rome….’. But Sir noticed and wasn’t entirely impressed. Kept telling me to “Stop with the sass!” So now i’m waiting to see how serious – or remembering/ forgetful – he was! We shall see!).

Hugs ~

Marie

39 – Domestic Discipline- in life

Written by Marie on . Posted in Deep Thoughts, Marriage, Submission. No Comments on 39 – Domestic Discipline- in life

For all you sex and spanking fans, this will be boring.

For all you Domestic Discipline fans, this might be insightful.

i know i mostly talk all about how our lifestyle revolves around “sex” and sex- related stuff. But it really isn’t just about that. It’s how our lifestyle is.

But i have come to realize that if i were in charge, things would be much stricter than they are. i’m not sure if Sir is just being a “good southern gentleman” or if he’s “shy” to take control or if he just doesn’t want to take control or maybe he just doesn’t think like me.

i asked him about this today and he said, “I don’t think you know what you are asking for.” But i think i do! i’m asking him to lead our marriage, to be the lead of our house, and ultimately me. In exchange, i respect, obey, and submit. In ALL things… sex and otherwise. Seems simple enough to me.

So here’s two examples of what happened just today …. i will tell you what happened AND what would have happened, had our roles been reversed.

Real life Example 1 – what did happen:

We like to play golf. Tomorrow we are going to play together. As of today, i have been braless for exactly one whole week. (Because i got my bras taken away last week when i didn’t have it off at 5:22 pm after work). And i TOLD David “i can’t play golf without a bra. It will hurt too much”

His response was, “hmm”.

Real life example 1 – what would’ve happened if our roles were reversed:

His response would’ve gone like this…. “excuse me? You have a rule that states ‘no bra when not mon-fri, 8-5, and tomorrow is a Saturday! So you have another thing coming if you think you can TELL me you are wearing one tomorrow! So you screwed up twice now… one by wanting to break a rule and two by telling me. Had you asked, I’d probably have understood your request and conceded. But now, you will absolutely NOT be wearing a bra! And maybe next time, you’ll think of how to word that to me in a way that is a respectful tone and in the form of a question with a ‘please Sir’ at the end. Do you understand me?”

And of course, i would be saying, “yes Sir, i am sorry Sir. i was clearly out of line Sir.”

And he would then respond with, “I’m not at all surprised to hear you apologize, but you will now be punished for your indiscretions. Get naked and assume the position.” (And prepare to be spanked, and to be followed up with standing in the corner for an indeterminable amount of time, until I decide otherwise!)

Real life example 2 – what did happen:

At 4:50, i got a text, “when home?” (And just to let YOU know …. today is a Friday and i NEVER work late on Friday’s. i truly believe i “have” to leave on time on Friday’s. i don’t know why, but i definitely have this “thing” about leaving on time on Friday’s).

So my response was, “10-minutes”.

Sir said, “ok, great. Can you stop and buy mozzarella cheese?”

Now the next thing you should know is that David cooks, and i clean. He was home cooking dinner when he sent those texts.

Real life example 2 – what would’ve happened if i were in charge:

“Because you WILL be leaving in 10-minutes, you need to stop to buy mozzarella cheese on the way home. Don’t forget.”

Now i don’t know about you, but the first example seems a bit more extreme to me than the second. But in both cases, i feel that i was disrespectful to Sir and he allowed it. i didn’t mean to be disrespectful, but like anyone, if allowed to do things inappropriate…. we do.

But just like a child, they need to be trained in the ways you want them to be. And if you allow them to treat you with dishonor, disrespect, and no submission at all…. well…. they won’t. And quite often, it becomes “who they are” and the way they do the things they do. And it becomes “normal.”

To a large degree, that’s how i am. We’ve been together for over 20-years (most of it married, but not all), and now, after finding DD only a year ago… my ways are dying hard. And David thinks i “don’t know what i’m really asking for”.

But i disagree with Sir. i think i know exactly what i am asking for and what i truly want. And i told him so too.

He responded with, “I’ll think about it. But you are not in control in the end!”

So we shall see.

Are you submissive? Have you asked for MORE? Did you regret it?

Hugs,

Marie

36 – Moment of truth – part 2

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So i left you hanging a bit in the last post and i thank YOU for commenting. i was impressed/surprised at how male or female D or s, the consensus was all the same: tell the truth and do it now, on my own, without being prompted.

i was surprised because i expected someone to say the opposite or at least a “maybe I wouldn’t tell” kind of response. But 100% said “The Truth Will Set You Free.”

And that’s what i did too.

i told the truth.

What were my motives? Well, i’m a terrible liar. Always have been. Even my Mom immediately knew i was lying as a kid. So there’s no point really!

But mainly, i did it because my conscience was holding me accountable. i mean, really, i agreed to submit and obey. That doesn’t mean “sometimes” or “when it fits my agenda”, but always. And part of submission is for him being able to trust me. And me putting all my trust in him, that even when i screw up, i know it will be ok in the end…. even if it means punishment to get to “the end” of the situation.

But remember, i was at work and he was at home. And we were texting. So i told him via text.

His response?

“Hmm”

Yikes! This won’t be good. i can’t wait to get home… or maybe i can!

Then… a few hours later, just before noon, he texts and says he is going out of town today (instead of tomorrow, which was the original planned flight and i already knew about). He will be gone for the next 4-days. And because he has to leave for the airport before i will be home from work, he will stop by the office on his way to the airport.

Now he didn’t say “why” he’d be by my office, but i knew he wouldn’t do any discipline there either. So i didn’t quite know what would happen now with respect to this transgression.

He came by and greeted everyone (my office has 15 people), kissed me, and whispered in my ear, “be good while I’m gone. You did good to tell the truth, but that doesn’t erase the transgression. But being good in these days ahead just might save your ass when I get back too.”

And off he went.

Now you would think i would’ve been on best behavior… nope, i wasn’t as good as i should’ve been.

Let me tell you what i first did. He has set a “no bra” rule (except mon-fri, 8-5) for me (read prior posts for details). And the next day was Friday. So i had on a bra to go to work. Then i needed to return a dress at the mall and went straight there after work.

At 5:22, i got a text from David that simply read, “Proof”.

i KNEW that meant i had to send a pic of myself right then showing no bra on. Not necessarily a topless pic, if whatever shirt i was wearing would reveal nipples enough to show no bra is on.

But i was at the mall. So i told him the truth. (It will set me free… right!?) i told him that i didn’t take it off when leaving work and so i couldn’t provide proof. (At this point, i’m thinking, “what kind of dumb ass am i? Am i wanting to be spanked?” Because it really seems like it!)

He again texted, “hmm”.

Well among a few smaller things, these were now the things that were landing my ass in hot water.

And he came home tonight. And what happened next was NOT what i thought would happen. At all.

i’ll leave you there for now. i’ll tell you about it in the next post.😋

Hugs,

Marie

24 – Playing without permission

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Speaking of playing without permission, i decided to do just that yesterday.  i was in my own mind, having a fantastic fantasy, and decided to “play it out” in real life.  Problem was:  it was NOT with permission.

Here’s what happened ….David was tired, on a Saturday, and decided to take an afternoon nap. i was not tired.  And my mind wandered.  And i got horny.

i imagined my Sir saying, “while I am napping, I want you to lay on the bed next to me. Do NOT wake me up.  But DO play with yourself.  Get yourself wet.  VERY wet.  But do NOT cum.  You are NOT allowed to cum!  Do you understand me?”

Me: “Yes Sir.  But Sir, i don’t know how long you will sleep.  That could be hours!?”

David says, “I’m glad you understand.  But do you really think I care that you don’t know how long it will be?  I gave a directive and I expect you to follow it!  Any reason why you can’t??”

Me:  “No Sir”.

Sir: “Good!  Now be a good girl and help me have some good dreams and wake up to an amazing reality.  You are allowed to use any toys you like.  You are simply NOT to cum or wake me.  Now do you understand?”

Me: “Yes Sir”.

So i got out my inflatable dildo.  And i inserted it.  And i pumped it up.  And pulled it in and out.  And inflated it more and more.  i counted how many ‘pumps’ i did.  i got to 10 before it felt tight.  So then i did 5 more!  It stretched my pussy so much it hurt.  i made myself hold that pain and stretch for a count of 60-seconds. i wasn’t sure the tears wouldn’t fall, but i held them back. 

And i released all the air. It deflated.  That’s when i touched my clit with one hand and pulled the dildo in and out with the other.  i was getting seriously aroused and very wet indeed!  

That’s when i repeated the inflation.  And again, i counted how many pumps of the dildo that i did.  Since i did 15 before, i did 15 again. It was SO completely large and tight. i had to use one hand to hold the dildo in while holding the pump with the other.  And i pumped it 2 more times.  And held it.

ALRIGHT – TIME OUT – insert sound effects — screeeeeetch … roll back tape.  SO what exactly is reality and what is fantasy?!

WELL – all of the above actually happened… the EXCEPTION being for the actual conversation with and direction from Sir.  THAT part was in my head.  The rest – the dildo, the pumping, the holding, the stretching, the touching my clit – THAT part – that all happened in real life.

And THAT was when Sir woke up!  OH NO.  WHAT WILL BE THE CONSEQUENCES?!? (insert sound effects:  Dun, dun, Dun….)

So i’ll say – What did NOT happen was Sir waking up at that moment and in that position and saying, “Oh my Good Girl!  How fantastic! You know I’ve been stretching you in anticipation of getting my entire hand in that pussy of mine!  I am SO pleased you used this time to make that pussy of mine so ready for me!”

NOPE.  Instead, what i heard was, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?  DID YOU HAVE PERMISSION FOR THAT???”

Me:  “Sir, can i explain?”

Sir:  “What’s to explain? It looks pretty obvious to me!”

Me: “Well, i had a fantasy….” (and i told him everything i told you above).

That’s when i heard him say, “Hold that pose.  Do NOT move”. 

That’s when he got off the bed (in real life) and disappeared into the bathroom.  When he came back, he took the dildo out. 

i was fully anticipating getting my ass beat raw.  But that was NOT what happened either!  Instead, he had lube in one hand, rubbing it onto his other. 

He said, “For this to work, you have to be VERY still and VERY relaxed.  Do NOT clinch your muscles or move your legs or ass one bit!”

Me:  “Yes Sir”.  (What?  i’m going to get my fantasy to become reality?!? And NOT get in trouble?!?!)

And he roughly and quickly pushed 2-fingers into my pussy.  i flinched.  And my muscles tightened.  That’s when the look on his face grimaced.  And i heard him say, “What part of ‘relax’ didn’t make sense?  relax.  NOW!”

Me:  “Yes Sir”. And i did. 

And all 4-of his fingers inserted into my cunt.  i focused on staying very relaxed and very calm.  i focused on my breathing.  

i heard Sir say, “Oh what a tight feeling.  Good Girl for not flinching that time.  Now just my thumb remains!”  And i felt it touch my clit for a second before it also went in.

WOW – that was SO tight. My back arched.  And that caused my pussy to also move positions.  And Sir took his free hand and slapped my tits. Followed by a hard squeeze of the nipples.  

i let out a yelp.  He said, “you deserved that!  Your movement caused my hand to hurt.  Do NOT move again or you will feel the same pain I feel!  Am I clear?!?!”

Me: “Yes Sir”.  And i kept repeating the words in my head “relax, relax, relax.  loose.  loose.  loose.  Wet.  wet. wet.”

And his hand pushed harder and further inside me. He was able to get about 3/4ths of it in.  And he wiggled his fingers.  THAT was such a turn on.  i was about to cum.  i could feel it.  i was already so wet and so turned on and now being in this position with David stretching inside me it was all too much.

i asked “Sir, may i cum now please?”

“No”

“PLEASE?”

“NO!”

And that was the very second he pulled it out and said, “You didn’t have permission to play with my pussy.  And now you are not allowed permission to cum either!”

Then David said, “Put the dildo back in.  Inflate it again. And turn over”

i did as i was told while he disappeared to the bathroom again.  i heard running water.  He’s cleaning up.  i heard a drawer.  i knew that was the paddle coming out.  

He said, “since you are so determined to have that cunt so stretched, I’m going to spank you hard now and you are NOT to allow that dildo to come out!  Do whatever you have to do, but it will NOT come out or we will start again!”

“Yes Sir”

He spanked me senseless and without mercy.  i deserved it.  i’d be lying if i didn’t admit too that i am glad i did it.  That fantasy come true was SO worth it.

But now today my ass is still sore as i type this.  But i’d do it again for THAT result!  🙂