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166 – Giving

Written by Marie on . Posted in My Dominant Sir. No Comments on 166 – Giving

i follow many other bloggers and read their posts (just about) daily. One such blogger is SubMissy. She has an amazing site and she writes so very well, which is very inspiring. She also does blog post prompts to which i am going to now participate in….

CURRENT PROMPT IS……

This month is all about giving. All good relationships are based on give and take, so how does giving work in your dynamic? Or why not focus on what you have done this season to make giving a priority? How does giving work with your headspace and where does giving and receiving fit for you?

So here’s my post about GIVING.

We have all heard ……IT IS BETTER TO GIVE THAN TO RECEIVE …. and i wholeheartedly disagree.

Yep, i am writing about GIVING and yet, i disagree with one of the most well-known phrases about it. The reason why i disagree is, in my opinion, really rather basic.

IF WE ALL BUSY GIVING, THEN WHO IS RECEIVING? In order to allow someone to give, someone else has to (graciously and kindly) receive it.

i would prefer the phrase to instead to be something like, “GIVING AND RECEIVING IS PERFECTLY DONE WHEN IT IS A PERFECTLY COMPLETE CIRCLE.”

All to often, when we give to people, you hear the other one saying things back to you that sound like:

1) “oh thank you, but I can’t possibly accept this.” or

2) “You shouldn’t have” or

3) “But I didn’t get you anything” or

4) “I feel like your charity case”

i could go on, but i think these are prime examples of things that i have heard and probably even said at some point in my lifetime.

The trouble with all these is that if i want to give you something…. i needyou to accept it. With grace and thankfulness, not some awkward and strange reluctance or even flat out refusal (#1 above).

i love to give. But it takes an open and accepting and gracious person to receive those gifts in return to have us both feel good about it.

i give to people out of love. i often think, “i have more than i need, and their need is greater than mine at this time, so i want to give this to them.”

And frequently i have heard, “I’m not a charity case.” (#4 above) said back to me. It becomes awkward then. i typically say something like, “i didn’t mean to insult you” or “it’s just my way of helping.” And once i even said, “it’s better to give than to receive.” She said, “oh so now you are giving to me so you can feel better about yourself?” Uhmmmmmm. No.

Now neither the giver nor the receiver is feeling good about it, and honestly, quite the opposite has occurred! The negativity has now overtaken the entire situation. What started as something good, has turned sour in a hurry. All because there was a receiving heart to accept the gift that was freely given.

In my marriage though, we have a healthy give-receive relationship. i think most people think that a D/s relationship is all about the submissive giving of herself physically, mentally, financially, and the Dominant would be receiving of it all. While that’s substantially true, it works in reverse too. Sometimes i think most people wouldn’t really think about our Dominant as the giver also, but they are. And for him to give to me, i have to receive it with grace and thanks in order to complete the circle.

So i kind of want to turn this prompt inside out and talk about how my Sir gives to me and my responses to him. At least that’s where i start, but i end up with me giving too! You’ll see. 😉

PHYSICAL GIVING

My husband cooks and i clean. i NEVER COOK. And we are both quite happy with this arrangement. Neither of us really ever expects the other to do what we aren’t good at and we are grateful for the skills and gifts we have to offer the other.

But cooking isn’t the only gift he regularly gives me. Yes, he gives me spankings. Regularly. If you read my blog, it is chopped full of stories of punishment spankings and maintenance spankings in order to maintain our dynamic. Domestic Discipline (DD) is alive and well in our relationship. By intention design.

In other posts, i have also said numerous times, “i do not like to be spanked.” And it is true. But i accept it, in part because i see it as a gift from David.

He has taken his time and physical energy, to spank me. It is (one of) his gifts of love to me, along with his amazing chef-like skills too. He does it (a spanking) with love in his heart and the ultimate goal of guiding me in the way we want our marriage to go. To keep us on track and to keep doing good.

He cares about our marriage and me enough to give me spankings.

But how can he give me spankings if i don’t accept it with grace and thankfulness? It wouldn’t work at all. Can you imagine me saying, “oh you really shouldn’t have. I can’t accept this.” Or better, “But I didn’t get you one.” ??

Giving simply doesn’t work without someone else receiving. And preferably receiving with a grateful and thankful heart. So i receive with a thankful heart.

When we are done with the spanking, every time he stands me upright and hugs and kisses on me. And he tells me how much he loves me. He gives me hugs and kisses at the end of giving me a spanking.

He has never made me thank him, but i typically do. i want him to know that while this was a physical gift that i may not have wanted, i know he does it because he does indeed love me. And i agreed long ago to accept it openly and lovingly. So i thank him in order to give him reassurance that this gift he’s given is accepted with a loving heart in return.

*** Did you see what i just did there? i said, “i thank him in order to GIVE Him reassurance” about his gift to me. So in the mere act of receiving, the giving has now been turned back inside-right by me giving him something too.

He doesn’t seek my thanks, but he receives it with grace and pride too. It creates in him a feeling of pride and appreciation when i give him reassurances of my willingness to accept the gift he’s given me.

So ultimately a grateful receiving heart ends up turning into a gracious giving heart, creating a full and complete and perfect circle of giving!

Okay, yes, he also gives me physical/tangible/ real gifts. And i do my very best to thank him for all of them, as he does in reverse. And of course, this works in the perfect circle too.

One of the gifts i gave him for Christmas was a set of canes. We have never owned any canes so this will be a new experience for us both. We have talked about it, but neither of us has gifted the other with a cane, until now.

He finds these gifts oddly strange of me to give. He asks me, “Why would you give me a gift of something that will bring about the very thing (a spanking) that you tell me you don’t want to have?”

My answer is simple, “Because you love me enough to guide me and i accept these spankings as a reminder of who we are together. We grow together in our DD relationship with reinforcement of what we know works.”

And it’s true.

That’s when he gave me a devilish looking grin and said, “I can’t wait for Friday’s Maintenance now!”

MENTAL GIVING

While he is physically giving me a spanking, i am mentally giving him my submissive heart, mind, and soul.

A spanking with a paddle stings. It is maybe best described like a bee sting or a needle prick. It hurts, but on,y for a split second and it leaves behind a heat that is felt for awhile thereafter. And that’s just one swat, which a spanking never is. As the swats continue, the sting builds as well as the heat it generates to.

From the very start, i have to tell myself to relax and accept this gift he is giving. i mentally pray before we start as i wait for him to come into the room and that prayer typically shows something like, “Lord help me to accept this spanking with grace and understanding that it ultimately comes from his guidance of me, through your guidance of him. Please Lord give him the confidence and strength to lead our family and me especially in the ways you want us to go.”

At some point during a spanking endorphins release and i actually do start to accept with a thankful heart each swat he delivers. It starts to feel good. My mind relaxes and it brings me into the best receiving heart and mind possible. My thoughts move from, “But i didn’t get you anything” to “Please never stopgivingme your all!”

GIVING AND RECEIVING IS PERFECT ONLY WHEN IT IS A PERFECTLY COMPLETE CIRCLE

So maybe you can see that while maybe the giving part is the start of the circle, it also requires a receiving part. And by receding the gift, you are simultaneously giving your thanks. And that original giving person is also receiving your praise and graciousness. The circle is complete.

No one is ever JUST giving or receiving. It has to be a complete and perfect circle for it all to work. You have to give AND receive… always.

If you are guilty of saying these things that I mentioned above…. STOP. Instead, say something like:

1) “oh wow, I’m so grateful for your kindness.” or

2) “This is so amazing.” or just a simple…

3) “THANK YOU!” Is always perfect too.

And genuinely mean it, from a truly receiving heart!

(Oh and final thoughts on this day…… as we say goodbye to 2020, this year was a gift….. yes, this year has been incredibly hard but it is a gift to be alive, to have friends to miss, to be thankful for the times we can and eventually will be back together, and an opportunity to have a receiving heart for better times ahead with enormous thankfulness!)

Hugs,

Marie

163 – It’s a dildo day

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In my last post i mentioned wearing a dildo to work.

i will tell you all about what happened….. and in the end, ask you again, “Am i a sex slave and submissive wife? Or just slave? Or just a submissive!” Where the line from sub ends and slave begins is my unanswered question at the moment.

But maybe it’s not really important what title i (or you) put on it. It just might be more important that i was following a directive from my Sir. And i was submitting…….

He said, “Bring me the inflatable dildo.”

Yes Sir. And i did.

He said, “Spread your legs.”

And i did.

And he pushed it up inside me. (i wear no panties, per his instruction from long ago. In fact, he took them away and i haven’t seen them since. i can’t wear them if i wanted to.)

He said, “Set an alarm for 60-minutes. Every hour, you will pump the bulb twice. And then report that to me in person or text.”

“Don’t miss or forget to do it, every hour. Both the pumping and the reporting.”

And he grabbed the pump bulb and squeezed it 5-times to give a start.

And off to work i went. The entire dildo fits right up inside me, but after it is squeezed many times and it inflates it becomes difficult to keep it inside. When i mentioned that to Sir, he said, “squeeze your legs tight to keep it inside.”

And that’s basically what i did. i had to or else it would have fallen out … into my pants and would’ve slid down my leg until it came out. NOT happening to me while at work!

Every hour. All day. The alarm went off, i gave two good pumps, and texted, “Another hour. 2-more pumps.”

By the day’s end, i had received 25-total pumps. The dildo was quite large. It felt fine while inside. But when i had to take it out for a restroom break, pushing it back inside was a major effort for sure! It i wasn’t going to disappoint my Sir, and i followed his instructions to the T.

And mid-way through the morning, in addition to the dildo, i received a text. It said, “Time to edge.”

i stared at it for a minute and texted back, “at work? Now?”

And he texted back, “Yes. That’s what i said.”

Thankfully i have my own office and have a birds eye view of anyone approaching, so i pushed my hand down in my pants and found my clit. i rubbed it until i almost exploded. i was at “the edge” of orgasm. And i wanted it. i wanted that orgasm.

It took everything in me to stop. But i did.

Why did i stop? Because i am a submissive (or a slave?) and i was told to edge. i was not told to orgasm. Orgasms from my body do not belong to me. i agreed long ago to never orgasm without permission. And i haven’t been given permission on this day to do anything other than go to the edge of orgasm.

i texted and said, “i have done it. But i really want to cum.”

He texted back, “Good girl. No. Do it again. Now.”

Holy crap. i did it again. It took about ONE minute and i nearly went over the edge. In fact, for a split second i actually thought i had gone over the edge (and orgasmed).

i felt panic rise in me. You see, because i am submissive, i want to please him. And had i gone over the edge, i would’ve felt badly. You’d think i would enjoy an orgasm and relish in the moment. But no, i would have no pleasure in an orgasm that is not allowed. And i wouldn’t want to see Sir’s face when i had to tell him i orgasmed without permission.

i was relieved when i knew that i had … quite literally…. gone to THE EDGE but had NOT gone over.

i told Sir all these things and he was quite pleased with me.

He said, “You will receive your reward when you are home. Now two more pumps and don’t forget to continue.”

By the end of the day, my puss was sore and stretched. But i was happy!

Upon getting home, Sir said to lay on the bed and wait for him. When he came in, he played a bit with the dildo pushing it further in and back out again. When he pulled it out fully, he commented on just how inflated it was and was impressed.

Then he put all five fingers inside me and pushed all the way to his knuckles. And pushed in and out. Then while in, he moved his fingers rapidly.

i begged him to allow me to cum. When he said no, i responded with, “Please Sir… either stop or allow me to cum… otherwise i will go over the edge without permission and i do not want to.”

He smiled and said, “Orgasm all you want.” And his fingers moved easily inside me and he felt me squeeze and release all over them! He kept going and i felt the ripple of more orgasms flow from me freely.

When he pulled out, i was exhausted.

We were both disappointed that he couldn’t get his hand all the way inside me, but we have determined his hand is simply too large. He said he will find a female suitable to do it for us, and when he does, he will take pictures. i will be ready!

i followed orders and was rewarded with multiple orgasms at my Sir’s hand… quite literally. i pleased him and he pleased me!

That all happened yesterday. Today, my puss is sore and thankfully allowed to rest. Will wait to see what tomorrow holds.

So what do you think…. submissive? Slave? Some combination of both? Or does it even matter….. i do as i am told, and i am rewarded. And when i don’t, i am punished. i happily accept both!

Hugs,

Marie

156 – The Big NO-NO!

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In DD or D/s relationships, there aren’t many “official” rules…. it’s what you make it. But just like a traditional relationship, there are a few unwritten rules that are generally followed by most people in the practice too.

And if or when you break a Cardinal Rule, and you blog about it, you should fully expect to be called out on it too. (Ok, so maybe the blogging and being called out part is just applicable to me….. and i am A-ok with that!)

What is this big No-No i am speaking specifically about?

TOPPING FROM THE BOTTOM. Or said more plainly, telling your Dominant how to be Dominant. Or even just telling your Dom what to do at all.

Submissives are expected to…. well….. submit. We are NOT in charge. So telling my Sir how or when or what to do is…. a BIG NO-NO!

That is THE Cardinal Rule that David & i talked about yesterday. But we decided to change the rules. We have agreed to intentionally break this rule.

i have permission to TOP FROM THE BOTTOM. For awhile. Temporarily. And just exactly how long? i don’t really know. At this point, i am assuming it will be, “Until told otherwise.”

So we have changed our DD or D/s relationship dynamic to refresh, renew, and update it. For awhile anyway.

There are so many questions running through my head, and maybe yours too… like: why, how will that work, are you still the submissive or are you switching, what is the goal, and and and……. ok, slow down. Let’s take these one at a time……

W-H-Y?

Primarily because we have been in a funk. Our DD just hasn’t been working as intended. It needs a tune-up. Just like anything in life, it works …. until it doesn’t. Take your car for example. It runs well when you keep it well oiled, lubed, maintained. (So talking about oiled and lubed gets me all wet down there.. but i digress!). But the minute you don’t do those things, it falls apart and requires a major overhaul.

That’s about where we’ve been, in need of a major overhaul. And this is our immediate solution.

Additionally, David has known for a very long time that my mind is more creative than his. He is a very straightforward and “what you see is what you get” kinda person. NO, he is NOT dumb or a robot or anything that bad …. he does have a brain and he knows how to use it. But he is a very firm and solid Type A person. Whereas i am a mostly Type A, but also have some Type B creativity also.

So because of my creative mind, over the couple of years of doing DD, i have made many suggestions of things we should do or could implement into our dynamic. (i was the one to ask for this dynamic and to be spanked from the start.). And as such, some have told me, that i TOP FROM THE BOTTOM… and frankly, to an extent, i would agree. But now, i have permission to do it intentionally too!

H-O-W WILL THAT WORK?

So i talked to David about this. i told him i struggle with this. That i struggle in my ability to not tell him how to do his job. And sometimes i feel like i fail (to keep my mouth shut) and/or he fails (to Dominate me effectively)…. which then makes me feel like i fail all over again (to submit to his leadership.. even if i think it’s not quite 100%). Ultimately… it mostly leads to me feeling a lot of failure. And i don’t like that feeling.

i have SO many thoughts in my head about how he can be a better Dom, enforce our Dynamic more, and it would keep us from sliding so far away from how we want to be. And if he did these things, i would submit even more and even better… and we would not have failure or backsliding or fights. Or at least not as much.

i literally said, “But i know i am the submissive and telling my Dom what to do is…. A BIG NO-NO.”

He said, “well, I can see why you feel this way, but remember that ultimately I make the rules and I am now telling you that I want to know more of what is in your head … at least for awhile. I want you to tell me, out loud (not in text), at the moment it applies, how you think I should respond to a situation. I may not do exactly what you say or want me too, because I am ultimately in charge.”

He continued, “But never forget that I am ultimately still your Dom and you will always be my submissive. You are not dominating me, and as such you don’t ever get to discipline me. I am still in control. You can tell me what’s in your head about how you think I should treat or say or discipline you. And I want you to tell me what you think at the time you think it… uncensored. I may just implement your words or thoughts, but I may not. You need to respect that.”

Me: Yes Sir.

W-H-O is the DOM now??

He went on a bit further to say, “I expect your thoughts mostly call for me to be stricter with you. So you should prepare yourself for that inevitable end. I fully expect I will likely implement your ideas at that very moment. And you may not like it.”

Me: “It sounds like i will be switching from submissive to dominant… on myself. I will be co-dominating me with you for a bit.”

(Does this make me the little i or now the Big I? Nah… i will always be the little i…. i know i am a submissive at heart. Just helping my Dom know my limits, know how strict is too strict, how strict isn’t enough? But i won’t be the Big I at all.)

Him: “in a sense that is exactly what will happen. But remember that in the end, I am still your ultimate dominant and your ideas – or switching from sub to Dom – is just that…. an idea. Unless I decide it is something to implement now.”

He then said, “but it will help me to better know what you think would be a good solution to a problem or what your limits truly are.“

W-H-A-T is the ultimate goal?

In essence, we will have a lot better communication. If i am more or less required to tell him how i think, at the time i think it, we will have a lot more communication. David will have a much better understanding of what i think is a successful Dom, and what i will respond to best.

If David knows what i respond to best, he will be a better Dom and i would also be a better submissive.

i am a bit worried though…. will i be creating and molding him into what I want or what he wants? Will my switching lead to me being an island of one? Will I just have a split personality and start submitting to myself? Will he become that robot that i push the buttons and he does as i say?

i don’t think so.

i think we will be better than ever… and always together. But time will tell.

Now i am off to find some sexy Non-blanket-Winter covering to wear to bed! (i have Dom ideas of what he should say to me about this too…. next post!)

Hugs,

Marie

155 – Reflections. Resetting. And Communication is Key.

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In the last post that i wrote about Winter being Hard, i more or less told you how i don’t deal well with the cold… mentally and how it is soooo hard for me to not just live under a blanket! (Good thing i live in Texas and not North Dakota! Or Canada! Or Russia!)

At the same time, i woke up (yesterday) to find another glitch of this site had caused my original post about Intentional Dependence was back in draft and not actually posted. Well, in order to post it again (and see if it was complete or not), i re-read much of that post prior to re-posting it.

It was interesting to reflect on that post about dependence because i had talked about being dependent upon David to make decisions and lead our family….. compared to as of late, we are in a funk and not quite our normal selves. And i realized how far i have slipped away from being “intentionally dependent” upon him to lead us.

And yes, when i talk about our “normal” selves, i am referring to our Domestic Discipline (DD) way of doing things. i am well aware that most people, including many of you reading my blog, do not do DD or have it as part of your normal life. But we do. And when it is used correctly, it works very well for us.

DD includes me being spanked. For both discipline and maintenance. The maintenance is preemptive, while the discipline is responsive. Both ultimately serve to reinforce and remind me that i am not in control. And my role in our marriage is NOT to be in control, but instead to follow. To submit. i don’t like being spanked. What i do like is the control that i give up and the power i pass over, and how anyone willing to submit to being spanked is humbled and having a real display of submissiveness. THAT is what i like.

But when we drift away from our normal ways, we struggle. And we get into disagreements and sometimes flat out… fights. Yet, when we are in our normal ways and doing what we know works, we don’t fight. Because it is clear who makes decisions and who submits… always.

So when i re-read that post about being Intentionally Dependent, one that i wrote when we were on solid daily DD ground, i saw how far from our DD ways we have gotten. In a very short time too! Drifting away from our normal ways sometimes happens without us quite realizing it. Kind of like when you drift along in the warm waves of the ocean. You look up and realize you’ve moved down the beach 50 yards from where you started. You can still see your staked out spot on the beach, but you’ve moved a long way from it too. You recognize where you should be, but you also see how far from it you suddenly moved.

And just like the beach, i can see where we moved to and yet, know we have to work extra hard to move back against the waves and the natural flow of the water to get back to where we want to be. Which can be exhausting really, but failure is not an option. We have to get back to normal to get our marriage back on solid ground and not drifting any which way the wind and waves take us. (Is it a surprise that i am talking about the beach when it is Winter? If i think warm thoughts, maybe i will become warm too!)

So how exactly do we do that….. how do i have “Intentional Dependence”, how is he responsible for me, and how do we get it back?

Well first is obviously looking up to see we are off course and being committed to getting it back.

But for me, part of what makes our DD ways work is the reinforcement. Having David do his part to enforce the rules, enforce the spankings, as well as praise for doing well.

i said in that post that i am still fully responsible for myself… and i am. But there’s a certain amount of responsibility that David has assumed as Head of our Household (HoH) and like the President, there are no days off. You don’t get to say, “today I’m not going to be President and I’ll pass that off to someone else today”, so is the same in our house. David doesn’t get to NOT lead us. And even more, the President gets re-elected (or not) every 4-years, whereas we aren’t changing this ….ever. More like a King or Monarchy, i suppose, that sill reign until death! (Will Queen Elizabeth ever die? Or if she does, will it be before or after Prince Charles? One does wonder about these things…)

So while it’s true, Winter is Hard, it’s not impossible. But when we just want a break from leading… or submitting… what do we do? How do we get it back? How do we get back up the beach to the spot we know we need to be at?

The short answer is… very carefully!

But you have to be willing to try. And if you fail, you try again. And if you can’t succeed even then, you talk about it. Communication is the key to solving so many problems. But you have to be willing to try to do that also!

Soooooooooo…………..

i have been trying to since mid-Nov to turn things around with me and David. And while it’s slow (patience is needed!), i see progress in the right direction!

What has happened lately? (Yeah… i know i haven’t been here much “lately”…. i honestly HAD to focus on me and David and well…. draw back on something and blogging was “it”).

i’ve focused really hard on trying to be the best submissive wife i can possibly be! And NO, i have NOT always succeeded! And yet, even without complete success, the fights (and even disagreements), have sincerely subsided.

i intend to share some of my particularly recent successes AND failures in the next few posts. But i will give you one example here….

This morning after leaving for work, i texted David. i told him, “i should talk in person, but i just couldn’t bear to see your face when i asked, “Do you like being in control?”

His response, “W-H-Y are you asking this?”

My answer, “Because maybe we have fallen away from our DD ways because maybe you don’t really want to be in control.”

His answer, “you are over analyzing things and you need to stop.”

i said, “could you please humor me and answer my question?”

And he said, “YES I do like being in control. You will never dominate me.”

And i said, “ok, let’s talk more in person about how i feel that lately i top from the bottom.”

And we did. We talked tonight.

But i will tell you that part tomorrow…. along with answering what i left open-ended in the Winter Is Hard ending also.

Hugs,

Marie

149 – When Tone matters… or not!

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Sometimes David says things to me in the form of a question, but it’s not at all intended that way. And sometimes he says things that sound like i actually have a say -so, but we both know it isn’t. And sometimes i call him out on it… in a Passive-Aggressive way.

Why do i call him out?…………..Because sometimes i can’t help but think, “Just say it. Just direct me. Quit giving me directives disguised as options.”

And today was one of those days. That he gave a question-directive and i called him out on it.

i told you about me texting him, requesting he be more dominant. He hasn’t done “much,” until this morning. So it probably wasn’t in my best interest to act this way today. But… alas, i did!

i was drinking coffee and playing on my phone when David said, “is it time to go edge?”

(Now he hasn’t asked/told me i had to edge in a long time now. So i was a bit taken back when he said this. And i was focused on coffee and still waking up…… so i said…… )

“No, i don’t think so.” And i kept drinking my coffee.

(Here’s the passive-aggressive part)

He said, “I think it IS time.”

i don’t think he saw, but i rolled my eyes at that moment. i did set my phone and coffee down and walked towards the bedroom. But i was annoyed for sure.

And i went to undress and lay on the bed, when he said, “You knew I was telling you to go do this.”

i said, “i suppose i did, but you did ask a question. It wasn’t a command, or said with much authority.”

(Okay, this wasn’t really passive-aggressive so much as just aggressive.)

He said, “My tone shouldn’t factor into your decision to listen to what I say. Correct?”

And i paused. (Yeah, probably shouldn’t have paused, but i was back to passive-aggressive).

When i spoke, i said one word, “Correct.”

That’s when he took action and said, “Assume the Position.” And he followed me to the bed, got out the paddle and it collided with my rear immediately. Multiple times and without warm up. As it did, i heard, “your tone needs to change. The sass needs to end. I’m really tired of it!”

(i did have sassiness. We both knew it. i was calling him out on his passive-aggressive ways with my passive AND aggressive ways.)

“Should my tone matter?”

No Sir.

“Will you follow my directive more quickly next time?”

Yes Sir.

And with several more BIG SWATS….. my ass was stinging!

Then i heard, “are you going to do better?”

Yes Sir.

And then he said, “Now turn over… and start to edge. Like i told you to do the first time.”

And i did. My rear was stinging so much it hurt to lay on it, but i wasn’t about to argue at ALL.

And i put the vibrator to my clit. It was a bit hard to be “in the mood,” when i had no interest in doing this. But i did it.

David proceeded to get dressed, including shoes and socks on, while watching – but ignoring – me. That’s when he leaned in and out two fingers in the front and two fingers in the back. It felt A-M-A-Z-I-N-G… especially after i had been edging for a good 10-minutes at that point. Because try as i had been, anytime you put a vibe on a clit for any length of time, and it WILL respond.

That’s when he moved his fingers in and out and said, “DO NOT even THINK about cumming!”

He did this for several more minutes and i was truly begging him to pleaseeeeeee let me cummmmmm.

And finally…. he did! i exploded all over his fingers in a magnificent way.

That’s when he said, “this will be the last time you get to cum when you haven’t listened and responded properly to my directive… whatever tone I use. Do you understand?”

Yes Sir, i do indeed understand.

[Careful what you wish – and ask – for!]

My Sir has truly shown me who is in control….. just like i knew i needed. i just hope i don’t have to endure much more of the spankings like this morning…. next time, i’ll try to keep my big ,outhitting shut!

That said though, while my rear end was tender for a bit today… every time i sat down, it ultimately made me happy.

Hugs,

Marie