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Author: Marie

237 – Pretty in Pink.

i told you about how David approved a new chastity belt to be bought. Well, i was planning to buy a $$$$ value, custom-built chastity belt but when it came to pressing the button to “submit” the order, i chickened out. (Catch the play on words… i submit to David, but not submit the order online?! Lol)

i started thinking about allllll the what-IF’s. What if it doesn’t fit right, what if this is a “phase,” what if i am allergic to the metal it’s made with, what if someone discovers my belt … how do i explain this…. Why am i crazy to want this..…. What if…. WHAT IF….. Anddddd what IF…..

And after the what-ifs became so many, i decided to instead order a cheaper $$$, but new, Chinese version. i told David i wanted to try to wear it more frequently and not just as a cute, sexy play toy or as a punishment. But rather, a regular occurrence with the purpose of limiting my own access to my own pussy to keep me more ready for him and to ensure i don’t have orgasms without permission.

While David doesn’t think a belt should be necessary and he thinks the chastity belt looks “really uncomfortable,” he does agree that i have zero self control.

Ever since ordering it (the cheaper version belt), i have been daydreaming nonstop about having it on. i have thought, “i wonder what it will be like i do this (whatever “this” is!) while belted.” And, “i wonder if David will want to be my key holder. i hope he takes the keys and does not give me the opportunity to just get out of it just anytime i want.”

And in the midst of all my thoughts…. it arrived.

The Chinese versions come disassembled and are quite adjustable. (i am not sure how the $$$$ custom-fit ones would arrive.). It’s great, as i don’t need to worry about whether i measured and ordered the exact-right-size. Giving me yet another opportunity to determine what the true, correct measurements for the really nice, $$$$ quite pricey, and quite-specifically-fitted belt should be.

It has taken me two days to get it set to where i think it’s the right fit. It was no easy feat! i wonder how many people would just give up!

But today…. It went on.

It is 8:40 pm as i write this. Been locked up for 30-minutes. i have no idea how long it will stay on.

It fits so snug. i can’t really reach my clit at all. Yes, i already tried. i had to know. But that’s the point, right?!?

i walked out of the bedroom with it on. Nothing else.

David was like, “oh wow! My wife is all locked up and looking so sexy!”

And he held his hand out. i was like, “what?”

He looked at me like i was the dumbest thing on the planet, rolls his eyes, and says, “keys??”

“Oh. Yeah. That.”

He smiled and said, “uh… yes. That. They belong to me.”

So i went and got them. Dropped them in his hand. And he smiled.

(That answered one question about whether he would be the key holder!).

He asked, “comfortable?”

i answered honestly with, “so far. But it’s only been a few minutes.”

He said, “we will see if you think it’s still comfortable next week.”

i admit… i am not entirely sure if he is thinking i will not come out of the chastity belt for an entire week or maybe i will be wearing it a lot, but not non-stop, and maybe by next week the shiny new toy isn’t so shiny then. i hope it is the latter. In fact, i am quite sure i won’t be able to put it on, and never have it come off (for a week straight), that quickly or easily.

My ultimate goal is to be locked up as long as David wants, without reason to take it off. To be more specific, i hope we get to the place where i am locked up anytime i am away from David (like work, grocery store, girl’s night out, etc – so neither i nor anyone else being able to touch me) and when David goes to sleep (to keep me from playing with myself at night).

So i wonder if the belt will come off tonight yet…. Small trial. Or will it stay on overnight… longer trial.

The belt is comfortable, fits quote snuggly, but does not hurt one bit. At least right now anyway. While it may start hurting at some point, its not supposed to hurt, if it’s fitted correctly anyway. Its supposed to fit tight enough to stop sex and/or masturbation. In my case, perhaps both but especially masturbation. So having a longer trial already so soon is really A-OK by me.

As we start to get ready for bed now, he announced he has hidden the keys. He continued by saying if i want them back or to have the lock opened, i have to ask nicely.

So i asked if i can have the keys to take it off for the night, and he smiled and said, “nope! You can sleep in it tonight.”

And now we are talking about ordinary things like whether the doors are locked, how our day went, what book we are each reading, about him having sinus congestion and that he has taken Tylenol PM… and will be asleep soon.

i will admit… i should’ve asked for an orgasm before getting locked in. As that’s now all that i have thought about for many minutes here tonight too!

i won’t lie though … i am happy. i wanted this. And i think it will be good for me. i know this will save me for David. It will make me be quite patient, submissive and receptive to David’s mood and needs. That’s the part i most look forward to.

And if this trial with the cheap $$$ belt goes well, i will indeed order the permanent $$$$ belt with glee.

We shall see if i agree with all these same sentiments by this time next week! Of course, all it takes is a little discipline…and my ability to O-B-E-Y!!

Hugs,

Marie

236 – The drought has ended…maybe. Hopefully!

i would certainly not say the flood gates have sprung wide open but beings as i was caned this afternoon, the weather forecast seems to have changed too.

My in laws are in town and I have been flirting with David the entire week they have been here. I’ve done it in a nonchalant way that could have gone unnoticed by most, including my in laws, but not by David.

Yesterday i inserted an anal plug in my ass, and texted David a picture. His response was a “hmm.” i admit, that response fully annoyed me. i wanted (needed!) more. A L-O-T more!

i left the plug in all afternoon. When we went swimming, i made a point to tell David it was still inside and swimming with us.

i have tried before to train my ass to accept a plug for a full 24-consecutive hours and to date have not succeeded, i do hope to get there one day.

i haven’t a clue why this is such a recurring goal for me…… Except i suppose i do know why after thinking about it a bit. It feels like an achievable goal to be able to manage and control my own body by pushing it past a limit that my body seems to want to maintain. i won’t do anything so extreme to cause myself to have medical issues, but i know i can master it. It is a power of mind over body that i want to gain. And as such, it is a great turn on for me.

That was probably a squirrel trail though, as it wasn’t too relevant to today’s topic of … weather. Which has shifted a bit. For the better. Even though it seems to be rainy.

While in our backyard pool, with our son and his parents inside, i tried to get David to sexually touch me and get me to orgasm. He got annoyed. He didn’t get completely angry, but definitely not happy either. The clouds were setting in.

And i did not get the O that i was seeking.

When we got out of the pool, and we’re in our room drying off, he said, “Take off your swimsuit. Get on the bed. On all fours, where your ass will face me so I can see the plug.”

i smiled and eagerly complied. i was happy to do as told, as i didn’t think this was leading to anything bad or negative. Why would i have assumed that? We have been in a severe drought mode lately! i assumed i was about to get my wish for him to have sex with me, in some form or fashion, and i’d get that orgasm after all.

But you know what happens when you assume, right?

He got the cane out. Ut oh.

i get asked frequently about whether being spanked with the cane or spanked with the paddle is better or worse. And which one of the two that i like (or hate) most. i would say that neither is better or worse, they are just quite different from one another. The cane has a very different, dialed-in, specific sting when it makes contact with my butt, compared to the paddle that is a very broad, all-over smack. They both hurt, but in very different ways.

The cane is very silent. It’s quiet effective for times when there are other people in the house. He told me to accept this caning with the same volume from my lips as the cane, which meant he expects to hear nothing. That is always a challenge.

As he delivered the swats he told me how i have been a bad girl flirting in front of his parents, in such overt ways that likely made them uncomfortable. When i started to squirm, i grabbed a pillow and buried my head in it to keep from making audible noises.

And that’s when i felt his touch. The caning continued with one hand, while his other hand explored my sex. He made a comment about how wet i was and that clearly i am turned on.

Pleasure and pain. i felt them both. And it was indeed a turn on.

i was physically turned on by his hand, but i was also mentally turned on with the idea that of his dominance had possibly (finally) come back to me. i enjoy submitting to my husband, and i know he enjoys having it. But words without actions frequently are moot, or maybe even mute. So the idea of being caned was quite a turn on for what it may now mean might be returning to our marriage. (The actual caning hurt like crazy!)

He urged me to give him that orgasm that i so wanted to have. And so i did. It flowed hard and fast from my body, all the while i bit down on the pillow to keep from making any noise at all. The orgasm flowed, while my butt was turned a bright red from the cane.

So the rain came down and i enjoyed it. i let the lovely wet feeling completely encompass my body, mentally and physically.

i continue to pray his dominance will return in full. While i am unclear yet if the drought has officially ended, i do know there was wet rain falling today! And it felt good!

Hugs,

Marie

235 – Daddy’s Girl plays with her baby doll – Fiction

She started the day out rather quickly by saying, “Today you’ll wear an anal plug,”

It wasn’t a “good morning” or “how’d you sleep” or even a kiss and a smile. I could tell today might not be a good day for me, but then again, depending on my attitude and perspective, maybe it would!

I was surprised because the mistress had never said anything like this before, nor had she ever been so direct with me so quickly, but nevertheless I responded appropriately with a simple, “yes ma’am.”

My husband, my Sir, has a girlfriend. She is also my Mistress, and she had stayed the night at our house last night. While he rose early to start his day but she was not so eager to get out of bed. It is a well known rule in our house that I am to stay in bed until the last member of the house is out. That’s because my services or my body may be needed and should be at their disposal to either of them whenever they choose. And apparently the mistress chose today.

Then she continued, “we have to get you ready. You need to shower and shave now. Be sure to shave close enough that no hair is found on your pussy.”

Well this bossiness was certainly new, but I was wet at her direction too. I conveyed my understanding and got immediately into the shower. After washing and shaving thoroughly, I exited the shower.

I wasn’t far into drying off when the Mistress appeared and she yanked the towel away from me. She said, “stand still. At attention. Don’t move while I finish drying you off.”

“Yes ma’am.” That’s when I did move into the attention-position she was expecting, with my legs a bit more than shoulder width apart, interlocked my fingers with hands behind my head, and stared straight forward.

She started to wipe my body dry starting at my top and going down to my feet. She seemed to slow at my breasts, and yet I must have imagined it as then she simply continued south.

I felt the towel go between my legs and her hand bring it to my pussy as she wiped it dry. That’s when I felt her mouth wrap around my breast nipple, while she dropped the towel but kept her hand in place, cupped around my sex. I clearly did not imagine her slowing at my boobs after all! As quickly as I felt her hand on my pussy, I also felt two fingers pressure their way past my previously closed lips to go straight up inside me. I gasped. But I didn’t dare look down or otherwise move. Of course, while I had hoped the gasp would go unnoticed, it wasn’t missed at all.

Mistress immediately bit down with her teeth on my nipple just enough to create a clamp like feeling and the pressure be known. Through her clamped teeth, I heard her say, “stop reacting! Stand perfectly still and at attention as I told you to!”

As quickly as it started, Mistress pulled her fingers out and released the clamp on my nipples, at which time she dried the remainder of my legs. That was a teaser with what I could assume would be more to come.

“Now get a cotton ball from the cabinet. Rub it throughly across your entire pussy. Then show it to me to prove that you’ve shaved as thoroughly as I instructed you to.”

I did as she asked, and she was indeed pleased. I had successfully shaved all hair from my pussy. It was bald as a baby.

She said, “very well done. Now on the bed, on all fours.”

“Yes ma’am.”

I moved to the bed and climbed on. I positioned myself perpendicular to the length of the bed, so that my feet were hanging off the side and my sex was facing her with ease. I spread my legs leaving everything easily available to the Mistress.

It was then that I heard her come behind me. She was between my legs and standing on the side of the bed as I waited to see what was to come next. That’s when I felt the tip of the plug start to my anal hole. I breathed in deep and prepared myself for the impending intrusion. I spoke to Mistress, “Ma’am, please go slow until it passes my sphincter muscle and I can adjust. That is always the hardest part.”

She didn’t respond with words, but I did hear a smooth groan sound too, seemingly one to imply she accepted my request.

I felt it slide slowly inside my ass. As it moved further and further in, I became more relieved – and thankful – my mistress was moving slowly. As she inched it further and further inside me, I finally felt my sphincter muscle relax and allow the dildo to pass. I let out a sigh of relief and thanked her profusely.

That’s when I felt her arms come over my shoulders and each hand grabbed at a breast. She squeezed each one tightly, and whispered in my ear, “ready for me to continue to fuck your ass?”

“Im sorry, I don’t understand Ma’am.”

She said, “I decided to not put a simple plug in your ass. Instead, I have a strap on cock that is currently fully seated deep in your ass now. I intend to fuck your ass until you reach orgasm.”

She continued, “Now, lay flat as I ride your ass and fuck you hard! Focus on getting to your orgasm as it will be the last one you receive for awhile!”

That’s when she pressed my back down hard onto the bed, causing me to be flat on my stomach, never allowing her cock to move from its deep seat inside my ass. I felt her legs straddle me and her hands press down on my back. She had effectively pinned me to the bed. That’s when she spoke again, saying, “I’m going to fuck your ass now. Making you know who is the boss and who is not. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

And with that, she moved her strapped-on cock in and out of my ass, slowly at first, but gaining speed quickly all the same. She pressed deeply each time. I think she intended to go so deep as to make a lasting impression on my physical and mental body both!

She asked me, “if I go faster, will you orgasm my baby doll?”

I was getting so near it already with my Mistress going so deep, the idea of her going even faster would likely set me over the edge. I used to think my pussy could not orgasm without it being touched, let alone not being penetrated. But I learned a long time ago now too, quite well actually, that I can indeed orgasm with any hole being fucked!

While I think she already knew the answer anyway, I told the truth and said, “yes Ma’am, I know I will!”

She said, “you must ask permission before you will actually be allowed to cum. If you fail to ask, or fail to get my approval before hand, you will regret it!”

And she pressed deep, and pulled out, and pressed again, and pulled out. She began to go faster. Just when I thought I was about to ask if I could cum, she suddenly stopped, while her cock was nearing the edge of completely vacating my ass. That’s when she asked me, “ready now?”

“Oh yes! Please Ma’am, I am so very in need of your love. Please allow me to orgasm!”

And with that, she pressed her cock all the way in and back out with vigor and intensity. She went fully in and came fully out. She was pressing down on my back as she used me as leverage, she said, “hold your ass open for me now! I want to go deeper yet!”

So I reached back with both hands, and pulled each cheek aside. She squealed with excitement and she did just as promised, by pressing deeper still.

In spite of the fact I did not think it was even possible, I moaned as I felt myself impaled even further! At that moment, I cried out, “Ma’am, please… can I cum?”

What I heard back surprised me. She slapped down on my ass hard and said, “No! I am not ready for you to orgasm. Be a good baby doll and listen now because I don’t want to have to spank you. NO!”

And with that she kept pounding at my ass even more. I screamed out, “Please… allow me to orgasm now Ma’am!”

Surprisingly, she told me no again. She continued, “I know you can beg harder than that! Give it to me… make me believe you have to orgasm!”

As she forced herself and her strapped-on cock to bury as deep as she could possibly go into my ass, I began to wonder if my ass would ever recover from this pounding! Although before I worried about that, I needed to orgasm first! I just simply had to orgasm! N-O-W!

“Pleaseeeee….. Ma’am. I need your approval. Please allow me to orgasm! My pussy is aching to let go. I need to feel my pussy pulse down hard at your cock’s pleasure. I want to orgasm so badly!”

She pressed her cock in deep, while laying herself down flat on top of me. While her boobs pressed against my back, I felt her hand slide down between the bed and up against my pussy. She stuck her fingers inside my needy cunt and said, “Yes! My baby slut girl, orgasm for me now! Let me feel it all over my fingers. N-O-W!”

And that’s all I needed. My needy cunt let go of all the pent up excitement and relaxed fully into her command, and drenched her fingers with my juices.

As the tension in my body left me fully and my pussy began to slow in the contractions from my massive orgasm, I closed my eyes and whispered thanks to my Ma’am for allowing me to orgasm.

She had been kissing at my neck as I was climaxing and cooing in my ear urging me to give it all to her, but now she lifted herself off of my back and after pulling out of my ass she said quite sternly, “do not move.” As if I had any energy or desire to move! Because I absolutely did not, I did exactly as instructed.

Mistress left from the bed to return just a minute later. She said, “flip over to your back now baby girl.” And of course, I did.

It was then that I saw she was holding my chastity belt. She said, “guess what else today holds for you my dear little one?!”

She continued, “now be a good girl and lift your bottom so I can put your steel panties on you now.” She also had wet wipes in her hand and said, “of course baby girl, we have to get you cleaned up from the naughty little mess you made first.”

I let Ma’am have her way with me because, well… I wouldn’t really have had a choice anyway. But in this case, I was actually quite grateful for all her loving care as my ass and pussy were both still throbbing from the pounding she delivered, as well as the orgasm too.

As I had already lifted my ass in the air, she placed the chastity belt down underneath me. The steel felt cold and stiff, as it always did. It was my fitted belt that I’ve gotten well accustomed to its feeling with as much as I’ve worn it over the last many months. After it was properly laid beneath me, I lowered my bottom back down to the bed.

She gingerly wiped at my pussy with the wet wipe. Then she had powder and sprinkled it on too saying, “oh little one, we have to keep you clean and dry now. Don’t want you to develop any rash down there, now do we?” I didn’t respond. I could tell it was a rhetorical question.

She fastenedthe belt straps in the front and as she started to put the lock on, she said, “And just like that, we get you all snuggled and settled in properly!”

And just like that, I heard the lock snap shut. That familiar sound was both relaxing and dreadful. I never knew just how long this stint in the chastity belt would last but I fully trust my Mistress and know she knows what’s best for me too.

She pulled me up into a seated position and smiled at me. She spoke, “Doesn’t my baby doll look magnificent now?! I just love you so!” And she put her arms around me into the biggest hug ever. I know she loves me as much as both myself and my Sir also love her!

That’s when I heard the familiar voice say, “Hey, I’m home. Where is everyone?” My husband had arrived back home.

Mistress called out, “I am in the bedroom. Come see me Daddy.”

When he came to the room, he smiled at her and engulfed her in his arms in as big of a hug as she had just given me. He said, “Baby girl, how’s your day been going so far?”

She said in the best big girl voice you’ve ever heard, “Look Daddy, I’ve been playing with my doll. Doesn’t she look so great in her steel panties? I love to dress her up Daddy. I got her into her panties all by myself, and I even remembered to wipe her bottom too. Thank you for getting her for me.”

He pulled back from his embrace and while looking at me he smiled and said to her, “oh baby girl, you’ve done so good with your dolly. I bet she loves it when you are so nice and play with her. Should I be nice and play with you now too?”

She said in the best little girl voice you’ve ever heard, “oh yes Daddy, I love it when we play together. Can I have my dolly girl stay on the bed so she can see what a good little girl I am for you?”

My Sir looked at me and smiled again. He said, “I’m sure your dolly would love to watch how well we play together, my love. I’m sure you are right in that she will see what a good girl you are indeed.”

With that I watched as my Sir, my Mistress’ Daddy, undressed her slowly and made love to her. I heard my Mistress giggle a few times and laugh while saying things like, “oh Daddy, that tickles,” and “Daddy, look at your stick-thing grow so long and hard” and “You make me feel all tingly inside Daddy.”

They were clearly having fun and making love to one another with such passion. It made my heart swell to see them in love. I love them both so much and it makes me happy to be loved by both of them too.

The entire time they “played” together, I was seated on the bed in nothing except my belt. Mistress made sure I was positioned so as to see everything that they did quite clearly, while being ever-so-silent as that’s what Baby Dolls do. They are silent, eyes open, taking it all in, without the ability to say or change a thing.

Honestly, there isn’t a single thing I’d want to change either… except maybe the ability to allow my pussy to orgasm just one more time! Of course, my pussy was locked in steel panties and that was not soon changing!

The end

Hugs,

Marie

234 – Long term Chastity

i have written before about chastity belts. i own a (cheap Chinese) chastity belt, but as it is cheap, it has quickly deteriorated and seen better days. The old adage of “you get what you pay for” is oh-so applicable here.

i have eyed the more expensive, more permanent, ones for a long while.

My opinion of why i want one has not changed. i wrote about it before, where my primary thought about it’s best use and reason to wear it is to protect or lock up what’s valuable. i have not wavered in this thought.

As i mentioned before, but feel it worthy of repeating….. you lock up things that matter. Things that are important. That you don’t want to be lost, stolen, or taken.

My submissive pussy is important and worthy of physically being locked up to be used by only my Sir at his leisure and no one else’s… including and maybe especially my own lust and desire!

The good chastity belts are NOT cheap at all. In part because they are custom made to fit, as a result no two are exactly alike, causing the price to match the workmanship.

i asked Sir if i could purchase one almost a year ago. i think he underestimated my desire to have it. That was when we got a cheap Chinese one instead. That was a good compromise because the cost was “just enough” for the cheap one that if i decided i did not like it, it wasn’t a huge investment. On the other hand, if i decided i did like it, i would truly know what i was spending (a lot of) money on before getting that deep into it. And either way, what was spent on the cheap one was a good investment to learn from.

Recently i asked him again if i could buy the expensive, custom fit one. At the time i asked him, his response was nonchalant and was a “I’ll think about it.”

Well…. today he said Y-E-S!

On some sane (or maybe insane?) level, i think i should rather NOT want one of these belts. While i definitely believe what i said before about locking up valuables, it seems a bit insane to volunteer (let alone ASK!!) to have my most private parts be locked under a key that only David holds.

i may be insane. i don’t know. Or maybe i do know, but don’t want to admit it.

What i do know and am willing to admit is that my sex is so turned on most of the time. And as such, i am tempted to play with myself a lot. while i wish i could tell you it was “just” a temptation, frequently, it is not. Frequently i find pleasure in touching myself to the point of orgasm. And sometimes more than once a day!

In my previous experiences with the cheap Chinese belt, the desire to be touched to the point of orgasm, was exponentially heightened when locked up. i was sexually frustrated virtually 24/7, to the point of mental craziness quite frequently. It was ok though as it led to two things: 1) a tangible reminder that it isn’t mine to play with, 2) even more desire to please and to have sex with David. Both great side effects of the situation!

None of the personal touching was supposed to be happening anyway but it did. And a chastity belt is a sure fire way to take that option away!

i love the way it hugs my body and gives that secure feeling! i love the idea of having all control of my own body taken away from me and given to the one who holds the key!

The biggest problem i experienced before was hygiene and keeping clean. i learned a lot of ways to keep clean before, but now i have found a lot more online (with a whole lot of deeeeppppp searching!) that i am anxious to try out in efforts to do better here too.

The most interesting thing i found is that the best way to stay clean is to take showers or baths while being sure to clean/rinse as throughly as possible. While the lock itself is not that water proof and needs to be cared for, that’s the only part that can’t get (fully) wet in the shower.

Further, i found some sites where women (and/or men) are locked up for long periods of time. One lady’s site i found, she was locked for a full year. And her husband took her out, made love to her, she cleaned up, and was relocked. i have to believe she was able to take it off for a thorough cleaning at least (say) once a week, but she did not mention that specifically either.

i think i would like to ultimately be locked during the week; from Mon-Fri. And be unlocked on Sat-Sun.

We have traditionally not had time for sexual activities during the week, but can make up for it on the weekend. Additionally, weekdays are when i am away from David the most. It will take time to build up to this level of chastity, but this is what would like to see. We shall wait to see what actually happens though too!

After a lot of searching for the right one… i have made a decision. And it is going to be on order soon. It will likely take 6-12 weeks to arrive, but it will be worth the wait!

i am super excited while at the exact same time feeling super insane… or maybe it’s the most sane thing i have done in awhile… giving myself to David completely is what i have always desired. This seems like the best way to do just that! But again, that may be the insanity side talking!

Which belt you ask? Well… i will tell you when it comes in. Or better yet, i will show you… with a pic of it. But… you’ll have to wait. Just like me. 😉

Hugs,

Marie

233 – i prayed for patience

Quite a long time ago….. like nearly 20-years ago now, i prayed to God to teach me patience. After about a year of enduring situations that demanded patience, i heard myself begging God to let me take back that same prayer… “Yeah, God… uhm… can we forget we had this little talk, shall we?”

i hated it! The only way to learn patience is to experience it….. to be patient. And wait.

To this day, i do not think God forgot. i think He merely laughed. And He put me into other various situations to continue to test my endurance… and patience.

Patience often means self control, which also means self discipline. i don’t mean self discipline as in self inflicted spankings, but rather more like controlling myself to avoid getting into a situation needing physical discipline at all.

Self discipline and self control are very much related and/or the same thing, but so is patience really. We all must learn these virtues throughout life. It’s what keeps us out of trouble.

So all of this can be hard under normal circumstances but add to it a D/s dynamic and it [being patience!] becomes very nearly required and yet… sometimes impossible.

i find myself having to exert a LOT of patience these days as i wait on David to decide if/when he wants to be in an (active) D/s relationship…. And let me tell you, it is pure torture.

But today i see it is already starting to payoff. i know what you are thinking…. “It’s just been a few days!”

But that’s because i only just told you about it. i just didn’t have the courage to tell you. Or maybe it was more like, i didn’t want to admit it… even to myself!

We started not (actively) living this lifestyle just after Christmas. It wasn’t a particular day or time that we decided to stop but rather the D/s activities just started to fade away over time.

So i have been praying and waiting and enduring …. And practiced building PATIENCE…

Today, i saw a small change. But it felt huge!

David & i were at an event with several friends. David made a comment to one of the friends where he spoke about something and i was quick to correct him. i didn’t mean to snap, but i had information that he didn’t and i blurted it out, effectively making him look (and probably feel) inadequate.

He looked sternly at me where in a hushed voice which was clearly audible for only my ears, he said, “you don’t need to be so snarky!”

i just responded with, “Yes. i agree.”

And i stopped.

Later in the day, hours after the event concluded, out of the blue he texted, “I noticed you listened.”

i knew what he was referring to immediately and i smiled. He noticed! i texted back, “as i mentioned, i intent to be the best submissive wife i can be. If you choose to enforce it, i would love that. But i know it needs to be your decision too.”

A minute later, i saw the tell tale blinking …. The Dots….. he was texting back….

And i waited more…. Exercising more patience!

That’s when his message came through and it said, “I likely will.”

And i feel confident, he will. Just can’t wait til he does…..

Ok.

i know.

i have to.

Wait.

BE PATIENT!

Hugs,

Marie