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164 – Merry RED-ASS Christmas

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i pray you all had an amazing day being surrounded by love one family and our Lord Jesus Christ. Did you receive many great gifts?

i got a new Keurig coffee pot and couldn’t be happier! Tomorrow’s coffee will be super amazing!

What i didn’t do right today though was my attitude. (In my defense, i think it was justified to be upset…. just not to have handled it the way i did!). i got quite upset with Sir earlier this evening and let him know how “rude and inconsiderate” he was.

My family had been over to our house for the day and as she was packing up to leave when David put on his shoes and left for a walk. We NEVER leave our house without telling one another (for any reason), and when he left i had no idea. Add to that, the fact that He/i have been walking together as of late, so W-H-Y he would just go and leave without telling me… or inviting me to go along upset me greatly!

He was either being rude … or inconsiderate… or flat out didn’t even think about me. No matter the case, i had my feelings hurt.

And while he was gone, i texted him and said as much. To which i received a text back that said, “you and I can go walking together when I return from this one.” i felt that was a consolation prize so I texted ONE word…

WHATEVER!

That’s when he texted back. “ASSUME THE POSITION!”

i wrote, “FINE!”

And i went to the bedroom, got naked, and bent over the bed. i typically pray for the Lord to give me strength, to give me the submissive heart He wants me to have, and for the Lord to speak to David’s heart to lead our family too.

But not today. Today i was seething mad. i had half a mind to not even go Assume the Position. i started to just ignore that directive and when he got home, i was going to say, “i was doing the dishes” …. and while it was true, i had been emptying the dishwasher at the time, we both knew it wasn’t what i should have made a priority when i was quite clearly told to Assume The Position.

So i had debated whether or not to even do as told! i was that…. upset….. (hurt really). And i didn’t think i should have to be spanked just because i called him out on what i thought he didn’t do right. (i don’t know if i should literally say he was “wrong,” but i want to.). However, i suppose i didn’t handle my hurt feelings well what so ever either and two wrongs just do not make a right!

But… i am not stupid either. i wasn’t going to give David even more reason to spank me… for disobedience then … so… i did. i assumed the position.

So instead of praying, today i was so mad i just got even more mad and decided i would take whatever he wanted to dish out. Gladly! And never once would i call for yellow (for him to slow down) or red (for him to stop)! i was determined (to be the winner)!

And that’s when he walked in. He picked up the paddle and spanked HARD! Straight out of the gate, from the first swat to the last!

David proceeded to spank my ass H-A-R-D. It was not only hard, but also with intentional intensity. He knew and so did i that while this may be a Friday, this was NOT maintenance. This was a punishment. Unfortunately when i am mad from the start that just spawned me on to dig my heels in deep and become quite stubborn.

He spanked me until i heard myself saying, “i am nearing yellow Sir.”

To which he said, “Are you still mad?”

And i didn’t answer.

He said, “Apparently you are. And until you say ‘Yellow’, i won’t slow down. So, again, I ask, Are you still mad?”

And i squeaked out, “i don’t want to be.”

He said, “Then we need to continue!” And he smacked my ass extra hard three times in the exactly same spot! It hurt SO much!

i offered up, “YES! i am not mad. Will you please stop Sir?”

i was suddenly no longer mad, hurt, or upset. My previous negative emotions had been replaced with just a desire to have this stop. i had suddenly backed down from my stubborn, won’t-give-in thoughts. i no longer wanted to be mad and instead welcomed Sir’s authority and to just have this all end.

But he didn’t stop just then. Instead while continuing to spank me, he asked me again, “Are you mad?”

i said, “No Sir”

While still continuing to spank (quite) hard, he asked, “Are you going to apologize for being rude to me with your tone?”

i said, “Yes Sir. i am sorry Sir.”

And start was when he stopped.

He stood me up, kissed me and said, “I’m sorry, I was not aware your family was leaving and thought I’d give you time to enjoy being with them while I got a quick walk in. We could’ve avoided this disagreement and punishment had you not responded the way you did though too.”

I said, “Thank you Sir for apologizing and explaining. i am sorry too.”

That’s when he said, “Assume the Position again.”

i was confused and asked, “Why??”

He said, “Because is Friday, and we haven’t done maintenance yet.” So i did. i assumed the position for the second time in only a few short minutes!

And he spanked me about 30 or so more times, with less than half the intensity as before, but twice as fast. i more or less screamed right into the pillow nearest me so as to not yell out loud. These particular spanks were not hard really, but on top of an already spanked ass was particularly painful in a hurry!

When completed, he stood me up and kissed me again and said. “How do you feel?”

And i said, “submissive and thankful. Thankful for the leadership that you exert. And most definitely loved too!”

He touched my pussy at that point and said, “what else could make you feel loved?”

i decided to be a bit close to the edge of “acceptable” and i got a devious smile on me face… and without breaking eye contact, i laid down on the bed. Backside to the bed already, i moved backward and laid down and spread my legs wide open.

He laughed and said, “Now don’t be pushy again. While I shouldn’t reward you with this, because it’s Christmas, I’ll give you this gift…..”

And he proceeded to lick me until I orgasmed. At one point, i asked him to stick his fingers inside me and he didn’t. Instead he said, “you never said the magic word.”

i said, “Sir.”

And i felt his finger go straight inside his pussy! i moved my hips so that i was fucking his finger, while feeling his tongue against my clit. i asked if i could cum, and he (thankfully) said yes.

Now i know….. speak better to him, with respect. And use the magic word often…. and i get to cum!

So the day started well, and is ending well. i am SO happy we didn’t get into a fight on Christmas… and i got the gift of love instead.

What could be better?! How was your holiday? Did you get rewarded with a punishment that ended with an orgasm? ❤️

Hugs and Merry Christmas! 🎄🎁

Marie

158 – Wednesday Maintenance

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Unlike the picture… i do not WANT daily maintenance but if it were to be installed, even temporarily, i am sure it would have a big (positive!) impact.

Thankfully though, we don’t typically do maintenance on “random” days. But we did this week… on Wednesday. i am usually spanked, for maintenance, on Friday. Today is Friday. i am unsure if i will be spanked again today for a second maintenance in one week or not. But i am ok if it happens.

As i have written before, maintenance doesn’t “hurt” per se. It stings super bad, and it turns my ass red. i suppose it does hurt my bottom, but it doesn’t hurt my mind. It actually helps my mind. It helps to reinforce the good. It is a reminder of how to slow down, stay in control of myself, be good, and how to submit.

But as i mentioned before, i am now telling David what i think about how to dominate me, at the time i think it. So in some ways, the Wednesday maintenance was of my own doing.

As i was showering this morning, i felt a bit “squirrelly.” i was already thinking about my crazy day ahead, things to do, remember, etc, …and worked myself up into a tizzy in a hurry.

That’s when the “creative self-dominant” side of me said, “if i was your dominant i would make you Assume the Position to be spanked. You need to calm down, be slowed down, and realize you don’t have to work yourself into this craziness all before the 8 o’clock hour!”

So i told David all these same things. And he said, “I agree and think you do need to slow down. Go Assume the Position for a maintenance session and I will be in when I am in.”

i waited in the bedroom for almost 10-full minutes before David came in. He doesn’t typically make me wait more than 1-3 minutes, but Wednesday was longer. He asked me, “Were you wondering when I would come in?”

And of course i had been, so i said, “Yes Sir.”

He said, “I wanted you to have time to sit still, do nothing, and focus on regaining self-composure and self-control.”

And with that, he proceeded by picking up the paddle (from the small of my back) and began to spank me on each butt cheek, alternating with each swat.

He told me, “You need to think about staying in position and not moving all over the place, like you typically do.” Usually i stay in position for about 5-10’ish swats, they life my upper body up to my elbows, then up to a standing position, then start dancing around. The whole time having to force myself back into position between swats. The more intense each swat is, the more i do this. He hates it! And i can see why. When i move around, he doesn’t have the control of when and where to hit the way he does when i am still.

He said, “your sole goal will be to stay in position…..still!”

And i received a very sound spanking. It was still a maintenance session and didn’t hurt me mentally, but my ass was a cherry red when he was done. It was very difficult to be still.

But i did it!!!!!

i have NEVER succeeded with this before. i have asked him many times if i could lay on the bed instead of standing bent over it, or if he could tie me into place. He has said no to both because he wants me to engage my mind and stay in the position he wants, not what i want. But when that swat lands…. it is both a sting and a shock. Oh yes, i know it is coming, but exactly when or exactly how hard. (Intensity level) is still a shock. So i end up moving all around.

But NOT TODAY! i stayed perfectly still!

At the end, David stood me up and kissed me deeply. He said, “you were such a good girl! I am so impressed and you made me very happy!”

“So lay down on the bed on your back and open your legs. I will give you a reward.”

i did as told. But man, laying on my reddened ass did not feel pleasurable! ……..but that was more than offset when his head went down between my legs and his tongue collided with my clit. It felt amazing!

He made me orgasm in just a few short minutes and i couldn’t have been happier! Some would call this a “forced orgasm,” but not me…. i gave it up willingly! Lol.

He then stood me up for the second time and kissed me deeply again. And when he pulled away he asked me, “and how does your cum taste since I just kissed you with it all over my face and tongue?”

And i said, “It felt amazing. It tasted good.”

(He has never made me taste myself, but the way he did that on Wednesday and the look on his face… it may become a more frequent thing…. who knows!)

And then we started our day from there! It is 6:20 am now… on Friday…. i am about to start my day today now too. Will report later if i have a second maintenance for the week. But if it goes like the Wednesday one, i will gladly give up another orgasm in a hurry! 😉)

Happy Friday!

Hugs,

Marie

157 – The Party on Saturday night

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This past Saturday we had my co-workers over to our house for a Christmas party. (Please NO comments about covid, a group gathering, masks, etc… it was my choice to invite them, they all knew the numbers AND the people who were invited AND the risk…. and yet they came anyway. Choices matter.)

Anytime we have hosted any party, ever, i get super stressed beforehand. i tend to worry about getting things made just “perfect”.. having enough food, the lay out of where to set things, enough chairs, the dogs bothering people, people mixing/mingling and having a good time.

i love the idea of hosting a party…. and we do an amazing job of it…. but … i tend to not actually enjoy any of it because i am too busy worrying, stressing, and scurrying around that i (mentally) miss most of it.

And David hates it. Not the party itself, but the way i freak out. Which usually causes us to bicker, snap at one another, or even fight beforehand.

i know i do it and i know he hates it. But i can’t control it either.

Well… i talked to David about it early-early on Saturday morning. And he happened to say, “so what can we do to change that outcome?”

This is the single question that has triggered the idea and ultimate discussion about me opening up my creative mind and telling him, “if i were in charge….”.

So i thought about it, and that’s when he was headed out to play a few holes of golf, and he said to text him my answer.

This is what i texted to him then:

As i think about your question and what we could do about me stressing out today, i hear an entire conversation in my head between us. I’ll share it with you now.

You say to me, “every time we have an event, you tend to get stressed, think you have to take over and be in charge, and you get bossy. You think that you can control the outcome of the party by controlling all aspects of it. I’ve never liked it and this time we are going to do it differently.”

You continued, “Today… we will be doing a lot of maintenance. Every hour, I will set a timer to go off at the top of the hour. When it goes off, you will immediately and without question, go to the bedroom and assume the position.

That’s when I will come in and spank you. You should expect that it WILL hurt! Every time!

I will give you 20-swats at each session. There will be no warm up. And between each one you will count and say ‘One Sir. Thank you Sir.’ And when we get to 20, we will be done until the next hour. Do you understand?”

Me, “yes Sir. How many hours will we do this?”

You, “until I decide you’ve learned how to not be bossy.”

You, “Additionally, please know that you will NOT be sexually touched or get to cum today. This is long overdue maintenance and intended to put myself in charge and you to submit. Not for you to be pleasured.”

“Finally, you will make a butt plug ready for me to insert. I intend to put it in at some point near the end of the maintenance sessions but you may end up being spanked with it in at some point as well. And you will likely wear it through the end of the party as a constant reminder that you are NOT to be bossy at any point!”

Me: Yes Sir. Thank you for your leadership and taking the time to spank me today.

After writing that to him, i waited for a response.

His only words back were, “I like that.”

Now what REALLY happened was…….

When David got home from golf a bit later, i was busy putting out plates, silverware, and the like, when he said, “let’s start that maintenance now. Go Assume the Position and I will be there in a bit.”

Me: Yes Sir. And i did.

That position he always wants me in to be spanked is….

– No clothes (at all), feet on the floor, spread shoulder width apart, bent over onto the bed from the waist up,

– head facing the bed or a pillow, palms facing down onto the bed, and with my arms laying up above my head,

– most importantly – the paddle resting in the small of my back.

As the way our bed sits, my back is then to the door. i hear the door open, but i can not see it or him. But i know he’s there.

His words upon seeing me in position were, “Now that’s my good girl! Exactly the way things are supposed to be.”

Because he is still in control and my Sir, he didn’t spank me the way i described above in the text. Instead, he did some small “love pats,” or warm-up swats. i received around 50 of them. While a few were slightly more powerful, not even one had any real force behind it. That said, the sting was felt and definitely made the impact Sir was seeking for it to do. It achieved the goal in no time at all.

The sting of the paddle hitting the same (general) area 50-times starts to build and it turns my butt very hot and very red. But these types of swats usually do not cause ANY bruising whatsoever, and is very impactful (mentally AND physically!)

While giving me this spanking, he did not make me count. Rather the opposite. He talked to me………

He said, “You don’t need to stress.” (Smack).

“You know it does nothing useful.” (Smack).

“You aren’t in control, I am.” (Smack).

“You need to trust that I am in control too.” (Smack).

“For the rest of the day, if you are stressing out, you need to stop and breathe. And slow yourself down.” (Smack).

“If I see you stressing today, I am going to first give you a warning. I suggest you heed it.” (Smack).

“Because if you start to stress today, or tonight at this party, and you don’t get yourself under control, I will assert my control instead and get you under control myself.” (Smack).

“We both know this is effective. Don’t we??” (Smack)

[i responded. “Yes Sir.]

“I will make you come to the bedroom and we will repeat this as much as is needed.” (Smack).

“Don’t even think of testing me, because I WILL do it all day long and even tonight with guests in our home.” (Smack)

“You wouldn’t want your co-workers to wonder why you’ve disappeared and hear the paddle falling on your ass, would you?” (Smack)

“I will spank you all afternoon and night in order to make you slow down and regain your composure if i need to, but i believe this preemptive discussion will curb most of that behavior.” (Smack, SMACK)

“Don’t you think so too?” (Smack… smack… SMACK!)

Me: Yes Sir. Thank you Sir.

So while turning my ass a bright red, getting very warm to the touch, and talking aloud to me, i heard his message loud and clear.

i didn’t receive another spanking all day… or night! Thank Goodness. Because while he hasn’t actually done anything “Dom-like” in front of others, so i don’t know if he would have spanked DURING the party for all to hear, i feel like testing him on this isn’t a wise-move either!

i did receive a verbal warning at one point in the afternoon though. He said, “I’m detecting stress in your voice. Is that an accurate assessment??”

i hadn’t even noticed it, but his words weren’t lost on me. And he was right! i took a deep breath, exhaled slowly and said, “Yes Sir.”

He said, “Are you able to change that on your own?”

And i said, “i believe so.”

To which he responded, “Good Girl.”

And i did. And we were both pleased!

So while i started out in the morning telling him how i wanted him to dominate me, he did an even better job of taking my ideas and implementing the parts that he felt were needed and tailoring it to him!

This is an example of how i think we will operate in the coming days with me speaking up about how he could or should treat (dominate) me and how i should respond (submit).

By the way… the party was amazing. We had a great time! People were smiling and laughing and ……..happy. Something i haven’t seen a lot of this year.

We all need to find something good in 2020 or at least to be happy about, even if it’s simply that the 2020 year is coming to an end!

And for some of us, finding the happy is a real struggle! i get it. The last 6’ish weeks have been a real struggle and David/i have had more disagreements than we’ve had in several years combined!

But maybe we are turning it around and ending the year on a good and happy note. Scratch the word maybe in that last sentence. We ARE ending the year positively. i hope you can too!

Hugs,

Marie

155 – Reflections. Resetting. And Communication is Key.

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In the last post that i wrote about Winter being Hard, i more or less told you how i don’t deal well with the cold… mentally and how it is soooo hard for me to not just live under a blanket! (Good thing i live in Texas and not North Dakota! Or Canada! Or Russia!)

At the same time, i woke up (yesterday) to find another glitch of this site had caused my original post about Intentional Dependence was back in draft and not actually posted. Well, in order to post it again (and see if it was complete or not), i re-read much of that post prior to re-posting it.

It was interesting to reflect on that post about dependence because i had talked about being dependent upon David to make decisions and lead our family….. compared to as of late, we are in a funk and not quite our normal selves. And i realized how far i have slipped away from being “intentionally dependent” upon him to lead us.

And yes, when i talk about our “normal” selves, i am referring to our Domestic Discipline (DD) way of doing things. i am well aware that most people, including many of you reading my blog, do not do DD or have it as part of your normal life. But we do. And when it is used correctly, it works very well for us.

DD includes me being spanked. For both discipline and maintenance. The maintenance is preemptive, while the discipline is responsive. Both ultimately serve to reinforce and remind me that i am not in control. And my role in our marriage is NOT to be in control, but instead to follow. To submit. i don’t like being spanked. What i do like is the control that i give up and the power i pass over, and how anyone willing to submit to being spanked is humbled and having a real display of submissiveness. THAT is what i like.

But when we drift away from our normal ways, we struggle. And we get into disagreements and sometimes flat out… fights. Yet, when we are in our normal ways and doing what we know works, we don’t fight. Because it is clear who makes decisions and who submits… always.

So when i re-read that post about being Intentionally Dependent, one that i wrote when we were on solid daily DD ground, i saw how far from our DD ways we have gotten. In a very short time too! Drifting away from our normal ways sometimes happens without us quite realizing it. Kind of like when you drift along in the warm waves of the ocean. You look up and realize you’ve moved down the beach 50 yards from where you started. You can still see your staked out spot on the beach, but you’ve moved a long way from it too. You recognize where you should be, but you also see how far from it you suddenly moved.

And just like the beach, i can see where we moved to and yet, know we have to work extra hard to move back against the waves and the natural flow of the water to get back to where we want to be. Which can be exhausting really, but failure is not an option. We have to get back to normal to get our marriage back on solid ground and not drifting any which way the wind and waves take us. (Is it a surprise that i am talking about the beach when it is Winter? If i think warm thoughts, maybe i will become warm too!)

So how exactly do we do that….. how do i have “Intentional Dependence”, how is he responsible for me, and how do we get it back?

Well first is obviously looking up to see we are off course and being committed to getting it back.

But for me, part of what makes our DD ways work is the reinforcement. Having David do his part to enforce the rules, enforce the spankings, as well as praise for doing well.

i said in that post that i am still fully responsible for myself… and i am. But there’s a certain amount of responsibility that David has assumed as Head of our Household (HoH) and like the President, there are no days off. You don’t get to say, “today I’m not going to be President and I’ll pass that off to someone else today”, so is the same in our house. David doesn’t get to NOT lead us. And even more, the President gets re-elected (or not) every 4-years, whereas we aren’t changing this ….ever. More like a King or Monarchy, i suppose, that sill reign until death! (Will Queen Elizabeth ever die? Or if she does, will it be before or after Prince Charles? One does wonder about these things…)

So while it’s true, Winter is Hard, it’s not impossible. But when we just want a break from leading… or submitting… what do we do? How do we get it back? How do we get back up the beach to the spot we know we need to be at?

The short answer is… very carefully!

But you have to be willing to try. And if you fail, you try again. And if you can’t succeed even then, you talk about it. Communication is the key to solving so many problems. But you have to be willing to try to do that also!

Soooooooooo…………..

i have been trying to since mid-Nov to turn things around with me and David. And while it’s slow (patience is needed!), i see progress in the right direction!

What has happened lately? (Yeah… i know i haven’t been here much “lately”…. i honestly HAD to focus on me and David and well…. draw back on something and blogging was “it”).

i’ve focused really hard on trying to be the best submissive wife i can possibly be! And NO, i have NOT always succeeded! And yet, even without complete success, the fights (and even disagreements), have sincerely subsided.

i intend to share some of my particularly recent successes AND failures in the next few posts. But i will give you one example here….

This morning after leaving for work, i texted David. i told him, “i should talk in person, but i just couldn’t bear to see your face when i asked, “Do you like being in control?”

His response, “W-H-Y are you asking this?”

My answer, “Because maybe we have fallen away from our DD ways because maybe you don’t really want to be in control.”

His answer, “you are over analyzing things and you need to stop.”

i said, “could you please humor me and answer my question?”

And he said, “YES I do like being in control. You will never dominate me.”

And i said, “ok, let’s talk more in person about how i feel that lately i top from the bottom.”

And we did. We talked tonight.

But i will tell you that part tomorrow…. along with answering what i left open-ended in the Winter Is Hard ending also.

Hugs,

Marie

153 – Happy Birthday to me

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Today is my birthday.

Here is how i define myself:

– mother – of 1 boy, 16-years old. He’s an amazing son and almost always follows the rules. Just like me!

– Texan – my whole life, through and through.

– overall Conservative beliefs, but truly believe “vote the candidate, not the party”.

– believe everyone should be able to live their life with freedoms to do as they think and believe are best….. but that also means you don’t push those beliefs onto someone else, because they too have the ability to live as they believe best, which possibly (probably!) differs from your beliefs in part of full.

– kindness is the best attribute to have.

– love others as Jesus taught us to love: unconditionally. No matter their color, race, sex, or other trait.

– we should always be learning. Things that others are different from me, physical or mental, are simply opportunities for me to learn.

– handouts shouldn’t be given as freely as they are, i’d prefer to teach you to fish for a lifetime than to give you a fish for today’s meal. Again, opportunity to learn.

– but if someone is in truly need, the handout should be available and given freely.

– but assess whether you truly need it, or just want it, being honest with yourself and others.

– i am 49-years old. About to live the last 365-days in the 40’s decade of my life. And i am ok with that!

– i feel “old” some days and “quite young” others.

– age isn’t just a state of mind, because my body has regular aches and pains telling me it is starting to feel the decades roll past. (But key word is “starting”, so i’m not “old” yet either).

– friend to many, but especially to my husband and my sister. My sister has been with me from the start of life and my husband has been with me for half of my life.

– married. In January Sir and i will have been married for 20-years, dated for 5-before that.

– submissive wife. i try my best to be as submissive as possible, but recognizing i am not a slave either. i am his wife, who follows his lead and directive.

– get spanked for discipline and punishment when submissiveness fails, or it’s just a Friday for maintenance.

– recognize that i am not in control of much of anything. God is is in control of everything though.

– and that God gave men the directive to lead and love his wife.

– and God also said the wife is to follow, submit and obey, her husband. So i do.

– Christian. As you can tell from above. i believe that Jesus is my Lord and Savior, and will one day come back to save us all from this failing world.

– a failing world in 2020 is where we are. But i know this is not my (ultimate) home.

– and i have come full circle in that while i want you to believe in Christ also, i won’t force it on you. But should you want to know or learn more, consider emailing me. i try to answer all emails, but sometimes i do miss some.

have a great and amazing day! This is the best Hump day in a long time!

Now go have my cake and eat it too!

Hugs,

Marie