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Tag: punishment

36 – Moment of truth – part 2

So i left you hanging a bit in the last post and i thank YOU for commenting. i was impressed/surprised at how male or female D or s, the consensus was all the same: tell the truth and do it now, on my own, without being prompted.

i was surprised because i expected someone to say the opposite or at least a “maybe I wouldn’t tell” kind of response. But 100% said “The Truth Will Set You Free.”

And that’s what i did too.

i told the truth.

What were my motives? Well, i’m a terrible liar. Always have been. Even my Mom immediately knew i was lying as a kid. So there’s no point really!

But mainly, i did it because my conscience was holding me accountable. i mean, really, i agreed to submit and obey. That doesn’t mean “sometimes” or “when it fits my agenda”, but always. And part of submission is for him being able to trust me. And me putting all my trust in him, that even when i screw up, i know it will be ok in the end…. even if it means punishment to get to “the end” of the situation.

But remember, i was at work and he was at home. And we were texting. So i told him via text.

His response?

“Hmm”

Yikes! This won’t be good. i can’t wait to get home… or maybe i can!

Then… a few hours later, just before noon, he texts and says he is going out of town today (instead of tomorrow, which was the original planned flight and i already knew about). He will be gone for the next 4-days. And because he has to leave for the airport before i will be home from work, he will stop by the office on his way to the airport.

Now he didn’t say “why” he’d be by my office, but i knew he wouldn’t do any discipline there either. So i didn’t quite know what would happen now with respect to this transgression.

He came by and greeted everyone (my office has 15 people), kissed me, and whispered in my ear, “be good while I’m gone. You did good to tell the truth, but that doesn’t erase the transgression. But being good in these days ahead just might save your ass when I get back too.”

And off he went.

Now you would think i would’ve been on best behavior… nope, i wasn’t as good as i should’ve been.

Let me tell you what i first did. He has set a “no bra” rule (except mon-fri, 8-5) for me (read prior posts for details). And the next day was Friday. So i had on a bra to go to work. Then i needed to return a dress at the mall and went straight there after work.

At 5:22, i got a text from David that simply read, “Proof”.

i KNEW that meant i had to send a pic of myself right then showing no bra on. Not necessarily a topless pic, if whatever shirt i was wearing would reveal nipples enough to show no bra is on.

But i was at the mall. So i told him the truth. (It will set me free… right!?) i told him that i didn’t take it off when leaving work and so i couldn’t provide proof. (At this point, i’m thinking, “what kind of dumb ass am i? Am i wanting to be spanked?” Because it really seems like it!)

He again texted, “hmm”.

Well among a few smaller things, these were now the things that were landing my ass in hot water.

And he came home tonight. And what happened next was NOT what i thought would happen. At all.

i’ll leave you there for now. i’ll tell you about it in the next post.😋

Hugs,

Marie

22 – WHY did i do it?

David and i don’t have many official “rules” to our DD.  But, like any good marriage, we do have some.

WHY do we have rules? 

Well, EVERY marriage has rules… who’s responsible for laundry, dishes, cooking, kids, paying bills, etc.  Maybe they are literally spelled out but they are inherent. It keeps things flowing in the right direction.  Right?

So our DD relationship also has rules.  Some anyway.  Again, we don’t have many, but the ones we have are there for a reason.

What rule am i talking about?

i like to take warm, soaking baths.  When we started this DD relationship, David made it clear to me he wanted me to ASK PERMISSION to take a bath.  Every time.  And i have done that.  Until today.

i just ‘decided’ to take a bath.  Without asking.  Without permission.   And i didn’t really care.  i knew the rule.  i knew i was supposed to ask.  And i just didn’t care.

After math…

So after i got out of the tub, i decided to rat myself out.  i texted Sir (he wasn’t home when i did the deed.)… and the text simply read, “i took a bath.”

And a few minutes later i get a text back that read, “did you enjoy it?”

“Yep”

“But you didn’t ask.”

“I know.  That’s why I’m telling you now.”

“But you knew I’d say yes.”

“True”

What made me do it?

i’m not entirely sure, but after i’ve thought about it NOW,  i can tell you what i think….

  • i was feeling self-indulgent.  i wanted to do something ‘for me’.
  • i was completely certain he’d say yes to it (even he said so – see text above), so why even have this rule?  What does it matter?  Just do it and maybe this dumb rule can be eliminated altogether.  Maybe even he will see that it is dumb.
  • what if today is “the” day he says no?  i didn’t want to chance Sir saying NO, so i decided to do it.  (Better to ask forgiveness than permission?!?!)

Let’s break this down…..

  • i was feeling self-indulgent.  i wanted to do something ‘for me’. 

Well of course i was.  i was “entitled” to something for me.  Right?  WRONG!  i acted like a spoiled little brat.  And while i didn’t think of it this way when i did it, i certainly now think it probably was a bratty thing to do.  (i never thought i was a ‘brat’ until maybe today.)

  • i was completely certain he’d say yes to it (even he said so – see text above), so why even have this rule?  What does it matter?  Just do it and maybe this dumb rule can be eliminated altogether.  Maybe even he will see that it is dumb.

So frankly there’s a lot in this thought.

First:  “He’s going to say yes”.  Okay, so what?  That tells me merely that Sir is trustworthy and consistent.  That shouldn’t be taken for granted.  AND the decision to say yes/ no wasn’t mine to make, it was his.  i’ve previously given him that decision-making-power, and today, i chose to take it back.  It wasn’t mine to take back.

Second:  “Dumb rule”.  Okay, so what.. again?  Even if i think it’s dumb, there’s some reason Sir put it out there from the start, made me think i needed to rat myself out, and David called me out on it today.  Not every rule in life makes sense to me, but like some of those others, maybe they are there for “my own good”.  And maybe i just need to follow the rules and not question them so much.  And i’m certainly not in a position of authority to be able to change them.

So accept them, follow them, and no one gets hurt!

And speaking of “HURT”……

Well, David is still not home yet.  In fact, i don’t expect him home for several more hours.  But my butt is already raw.. not literally , yet anyway.  But i’m WELL aware that it will be.  Just sitting here typing i can already appreciate how sore my butt will be the next time i sit down to do anything.

WHY DID I DO THIS?

i’m not entirely sure, because if i’d thought through everything i just did here BEFORE i’d broken the rule, i’d not be contemplating the soon-to-be-inflicted pain.

Hugs and Kisses ~

Marie

18 – Red Beans and Rice.

LONG post – sorry, but hopefully you will understand…. and read through anyway.  🙂

So today was NOT my best day.  And Sir is requiring a blog posting about it “now”.  So here i am, being vulnerable, and telling you how my day has gone.

USEFUL STORY FACTS.

Let me tell you about how my day started…

#1 – our son had a failed attempt to spend the night with a friend last night.  A friend was having a sleep over and at 3:00 am this morning son texted me asking to go get him and bring him home.  The (teen) boys had had a fight and he just wanted to leave.  So i was up earlyyyyy.  And i (basically) didn’t go back to sleep after getting him home and listening to him tell me the “whole story”.

#2 – a friend who lives out of State, who i haven’t seen in 10- years was in town for just the weekend and (after getting Sir’s approval) we agreed to get together this morning.   And i was super excited to get to see her today.

#3 – David was going to church early due to being on technical team and the original plan was that i would drop our son at church, and then go see said friend from there. (i was allowed to miss to go see my friend).


So with that.  i texted David at 8:00am to report the events with our son and to confirm it was okay for our son to skip church also.  Well, like all texting convos, while i was telling him about our son, he was asking me to do some tasks before i left.

He asked that i would rinse the RED BEANS and put them in water to soak.  And if i did that, the beans would then be ready to go when he was home from church, so he would set them to cooking to be ready for tonight’s dinner.

He proceeded to give me explicit directions on EXACTLY what to do to get the beans soaking in the way he wanted them.  This was all via text and between me saying, “yes Sir” i would also write more about our son’s mishaps that occurred overnight and got permission to allow our son to sleep in and also miss church.

So with that,  i went to the shower, dressed, and left the house.  Went to meet my friend.  Off and on texting with Sir about having fun, etc.

And a bit later,  i received a text from Sir that said, “Forget something??” after he had gotten home from church.

Oh crap.  i forgot the beans.  How to respond?  NO WAY i can deny that i didn’t know how to do it.  He texted EVERY step.  

i responded, “Yes Sir.  i did.  i forgot the beans.  i’m so very sorry”.

To which i received a text saying “What ELSE?

What else?!  Uhmm.  NO idea…. Yikes.

i responded, “i’m not sure i know of anything else Sir.”

To which i received a text saying, “Your Collar?!”

(i have a collar that while it’s not been exactly or explicitly made clear when it is expected to be on or off, i basically “just know”.  And it is basically, “All the time, but especially when leaving the house”.  So i knew this was a time i should have worn it!)

Oh double crap.  i clearly wasn’t thinking about anything Sir wanted or expected when i was dressing and leaving to meet with my friend!

i responded, “yes Sir.  i have failed to wear it today.  i’m sorry.”

To which i received a “Hmm” text back.  Oh triple crap.  NOT good!

Well, he didn’t text again.  And the entire thing weighed heavy on my mind the rest of my friend meeting.  And i texted, “i’m heading home now” at the conclusion of our meeting.

And i got a text back that said, “You need to stop and buy a bag of Red beans.”

“Yes Sir”.

i did.

And with that, Sir greets me and says, “I’m going to take a nap.  We will deal with you after that!”

The waiting continues.  The weight on my mind is NOT alleviated at ALL yet.

After Sir gets up, he says, “Go to the bedroom, take off all your clothes, put ON YOUR COLLAR and wait for me on the bed.  I’m going to order pizza so we have SOMETHING to eat for dinner!”

Five very long minutes later…..

He comes in, with the bag of red beans that i had bought, and says, “You’ve had trouble listening and follow through with tasks today. When I tell you to do something, I expect it to be done.  Now you have to learn a lesson.”

And he proceeded to pour the beans onto the floor, near the wall.   He points to it.  He says “Kneel.  Now.  Put your nose to the wall.  You will be here until the pizza is delivered.”

And he left.

WELL – the first thoughts i had was, “This isn’t as bad as i feared.  In fact, i’m not sure this will be any consequence or punishment at all!”  But that feeling did NOT last long!

The minutes ticked away.  My knees started to feel it.  i shifted my weight from left to right.  i thought, “Wow, that hurt!” but i also felt the beans “move”.  Well, i wasn’t too sure how Sir would respond if he came back and found that the beans were basically NOT under my knees.  So i leaned back, pushed them together in a cohesive pile, and went back to position.

OH MY GOSH.  MISTAKE.  THAT HURT!

And i waited.  My back was starting to hurt from leaning into the wall for my nose to touch.  So now my knees AND my back hurt.

And he came back.  He asked, “How are we doing??”  i had NO real idea how to respond.  i worried that saying i was in pain would seem like a complaint, but to NOT say that would be a lie.  So i opted for the truth to which he responded with, “GOOD!”

That’s when he slipped his fingers between my legs and i squirmed.  OUCH.  That squirm made the beans shift and sent pain through my knees.  He saw the movement and said, “DO NOT MOVE! And don’t even think of Coming!”.  He rubbed my clit and it was wet in an instant.  i always get wet when he touches me.  And then he pushed a finger in my ass.  In. Out.  In. Out.  Deeper in.  All the way out.  Faster in.  Faster out.

My head leaned back.  i could feel the orgasm building.  And he said, “Nose on the wall!  I said do NOT move!” and he pulled fingers out and slapped my ass.  Over and over.  And while it didn’t hurt, it did a nice warm-up too!  And i did not and was not allowed to cum.

And he left.

And i waited.  And the beans shifted.  So i shuffled them back together.  Again.  And IT HURT!  You’d think i’d have learned the first time!  But no, i didn’t.  This time, tears came to my eyes when i made myself get back in place.

45-long-minutes-later, i heard the door bell ring.  i was never so happy to hear that bell!

And just a couple of minutes after that, Sir came in and asked, “Have you learned that you need to remember to do as i ask?”

“Oh yes, Sir, i have!”

“Do your knees hurt?”

“Oh yes, Sir, they do!”

“Good!” (then he told me to stand, gave me forgiveness kisses and hugs) and he also said, “Now get dressed, get a Ziploc and clean up the beans.  Do not throw them away.  Keep them.  i may need to repeat this at some point!  Then take a picture of your knees.  Keep it as a reminder.  And let’s go eat dinner… albeit PIZZA and NOT red beans and rice!”

“Yes Sir”

And we ate Pizza.   Afterward he said, “Now go blog about this.  I want you to remember this! and post the Picture with it”

In case you are wondering, YES, those are my knees in this picture above.  (Sexy, right?! LOL).  And 2-hours later, they are still indented, although not as bad.  And they still sting too!

Red beans will be tomorrow’s meal.  And i hope to NEVER have this repeated.

Hugs and Kisses ~

Marie