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68 – Happy Birthday to Sir

Tomorrow is David’s birthday. And he’s asked me for about 5-years to get my nipples pierced.

And until this year… i have always said “NO!” (Capitalized! As in, No way, not happening, quit asking!)

And yet…. he hasn’t quit asking.

This is not one of those things that he has “control” over me. He has merely asked. Not demanded, commanded, or required. He has literally just asked. Continually. And without ceasing. He has never forced this on me as in a D/s way, because he didn’t want to make me do something i just wasn’t ok with!

But i’ve thought about it … a lot.

And i researched it….a lot.

And i almost did it just before covid hit. And then everything shut down. So i’ve had 2-more months to think about it……

So now after more than 6-months of giving it a LOT of thought……

i surprised him (and being perfectly honest…probably myself too !!) and said, “if you want this to happen, i am ready”

And he said, “HELL yes! Happy Birthday to me!”

And so….. here i am.

Waiting in the virtual (COVID – wait in your car) line. To get them pierced.

i have been here … waiting… for an hour…. truly thinking i want to chicken out and go home. And yet, i don’t.

Yikes. We shall see!

Hugs,

Marie

UPDATE: after 2 1/2 hours waiting…. they are both pierced! And truthfully it didn’t even hurt nearly like i expected or anticipated. A little sore right now, but i’m SO happy i did it!!!!

And David is BEYOND happy about it! Which makes it even better still!! ❤️

67 – Silence is Golden

When i got home from work, i did as i was told. i greeted everyone, including my in-laws (who are VERY conservative people, and to whom we would NEVER talk intimate details with!)…. and excused myself to go to our bedroom.

As i did so, i heard David say to me, “is your headache feeling better? Maybe you should take something and stay in our room for a few minutes.”

i knew that was a reminder and an “out”. He was giving me reason to stay in our room for awhile and to assume the position without my in laws or our son wondering what was taking me so long to simply change out of work clothes. So i smiled at him and said, “that sounds like a good idea.”

i won’t deny… i was nervous. i had no idea what he had planned, but i knew he wouldn’t embarrass either of us in front of his parents and after the morning exchange about trust, i decided to …well…just …trust him.

So i closed our door, got completely naked, bent over the bed, feet on the floor and placed the paddle in the small of my back and waited for Sir to come in.

He didn’t make me wait long. As usual, i couldn’t see him but i could hear him. The first thing he said was, “good girl. Do you know why we are here?”

Me: Yes Sir.

Him: Hmmm. I really doubt you do. I told you to shut our bedroom door before you left for work. You know the little dog has been urinating on our bedroom carpet. Did you remember to shut our door today?”

Me: (in my head), “ahh crap! Now i know why he told me i was in trouble. i did forget!

Me: (outloud): no Sir, i did not remember.

Him: So you will agree that punishment is in order for not following orders… but also about questioning my judgment and seeming to not trust me this morning when I told you to come straight here (to the bedroom) after work?!?”

Me: Yes Sir.

That’s when he lifted the paddle from my back and i braced myself, praying no one would hear from the living room. But the swats didn’t come.

Instead, i felt something start to rub against my butt cheeks.

And he said, “we haven’t ever done a silent spanking before, but today you are receiving your first. This is capsaicin and soon it will start to burn. You will be able to feel this for a good long time tonight.”

And when he was done with that, he said, “now go get the largest butt plug you own and some lube. Bring it back. And re-assume the position”

Oh geez. We aren’t done? My butt is already starting to heat up as it is!

Me: Yes Sir.

When i came back he said, “now the silent spanking is to atone for the bedroom door not being closed like I asked you to do. This plug will be put in place to remind you to trust me.

I will put it in and it will stay in from now until bedtime. You are to stay here for a bit, then dress and rejoin us. If at any point between now and bedtime it seems you are not acting completely normal, it will stay in overnight. Do you understand?”

Me: not like could say much other than: Yes Sir.

And with that, he pushed it in. It hurt a little going in, but he did show kindness and mercy… and i knew it was deserved. Now my job was to “act normal”.

Just before bed……..

Him: you did not act completely normal after dinner. I saw you squirming. I saw you trying to adjust the plug. I’m sure it was getting uncomfortable but that was the whole point… to have you learn how to submit even in the face of adversity and in times that maybe you don’t ‘feel’ like it.”

Me: Yes Sir. You are correct. i tried to be normal as much as possible, but i knew i wasn’t.

Him: go get my favorite purple plug and bring it to me. And once again, assume the position.

Me: geez. What has caused him to be so strict all of a sudden? i guess this IS what i have wanted… but… won’t deny it sounded better in my head than in reality! At least so it seems right now anyway!

But…. i did as i was told.

Naked again. Bent over the side of the bed. He pulled the large plug out… And said, “I told you that you’d have to wear that plug to bed. And you know I’ve been wanting to make you do this for some time. But since we’ve never done this before, I’m feeling kind. I’m going to put this purple plug in since it is smaller. You are to sleep with it in, all night long. I will take it out in the morning. And if I wake up to go pee in the night, rest assured I will check to see if you are still compliant.”

And that’s how i slept. Not good sleep. Long after he turned out the light saying good night and that he loved me… (not surprisingly) it took a long time to fall asleep.

But… it was deserved. And i knew it. And i am finally starting to see his dominant side truly be dominant. And in time, i suspect this too shall ease. But this is what i’ve wanted….For him to dominate and me to submit.

Every time i found myself awake, i thanked God for David and his leadership and his love…. i’m glad God gave him to me.

After almost 20-years of marriage, we have finally found our stride… And i am glad in it.

Hugs,

Marie

66 – So maybe my trust is lacking….

i have noticed that, if i were to be completely honest with myself, i do hesitate. i really don’t mean to. But when Sir says do something, i question him….

Like when he said “assume the position” (see previous post) his exact words were “I think you should probably go assume the position”

And i hesitated. When he asked me why. i said, “you think… probably…. so is that an order? Or just some thoughts you had out loud? And did you mean NOW?”

He rolled his eyes and said, “the word ‘probably’ is more than 50% so you should assume I meant to do it. And I wouldn’t say it now if I didn’t want you to do it now”

And I said, “yes sir” and THEN did as i was told.

And then yesterday i also hesitated when he said to take my top off.

And now today…… when we left for work, he texted saying that when i get home, i am to go straight to the bedroom and “assume the position” (again).

Well…. his parents are in town and in our home…. and they will HEAR a spanking happening. So i said, “But Sir….” and he stopped me right there and said “as I already said and now completely believe to be fact, you clearly do NOT trust me enough. Do as I say and quit questioning me!”

Yes sir!

And so i will wait time see what tonight holds.

i clearly need to do better.

Hugs,

Marie

Day 9: My Submissiveness

DAY 9 : LISTEN…Post a kink related song or music video you enjoy. Describe why it works for you.

“Love in an Elevator, Loving it up as it’s going down…..”. Aerosmith

This song has always had such a catchy-tune and when i was young, i didn’t appreciate the sexual content.

But now that i am old(er) 😉, i hear it and think about all the possibilities.

i mean, seriously…. did he slam her against the side of the elevator, hike up her dress, pumping inside of her, to the point that her feet are off the ground… all the way down? And did the elevator not stop on any other floor? Or did it stop and other people got on/off… and they just didn’t care??!!? “They” being the ones having sex OR the ones that got on/off.

Or maybe the other people who got on the elevator did care…. and joined in! Maybe it was a “touch my girl and she will touch you back!” kind of thing. And maybe it turned into a gang bang right there with her on full display, her feet not touching the floor, and her legs spread wide open!

All of which ends just wayyyyy too soon…. with a “ding” at the first floor and the doors opening. That’s when they all just walk away …to see each other (and maybe repeat) the next day when they leave work at the end of the day together again! ☺️

Hugs,

Marie

65 – Topless

Sir is determined to teach me to trust him. He says i don’t. And while i would love to argue with him, it’s a matter of opinion… and ultimately if that’s how he feels, well, it isn’t wrong. And i have no right to argue.

Today our microwave blew up. (Almost quite literally had a fire in our house, but it was contained inside the microwave. So all good! Oh and no, there was no aluminum inside. It happened while making popcorn.). But that’s when he said “we are going to buy a new one. Let’s go.”

And the two of us got in the car. Just us. No child. And within 1-mile of our house, he said… “take your top off”.

i am not allowed to wear a bra in his presence and only when “absolutely necessary” at all other times too. So he knew i had nothing on under my top.

i hesitated. He looked straight at me, raised his eyebrows and said, “did i stutter?”

i said, “No Sir,” and proceeded to remove my top. Quite slowly, but still making forward motion.

Broad daylight. Mid afternoon.

It made me nervous. i was antsy and shifting and he saw it. He said, “put your hands under your ass. Sit on them. And sit up tall. Proudly display yourself! Show me my boobs!”

i said, “yes Sir” and did so.

And that was when he rolled down the windows. For anyone & everyone to see who drove past. And he said, “Chin up. Smile. Look confident my sweetheart. I am, and you should be too!”

When we got to the store, i started to put my top back on. He said, “No. Leave it off. You can stay in the car while I get the microwave. I’ll return shortly.” And he left me in the parking lot, topless, wishing like hell i had another option – and knowing i didn’t!

And of course, a few people saw me. Thankfully no one i knew saw me! (He had parked near the edge of the lot where just a few cars were at, and had also rolled back up the windows, so not that many saw!)

Then on the way home, he told me to pinch my nipples and do not stop without permission, to which i had to beg for release. And in no time at all i was begging! After making me wait until he felt it was indeed time for a release, he allowed it. It was repeated periodically all the way home.

When we got home, he asked me if i felt sore. Of course, i did. He told me that was to be a reminder to trust him (more) in the future. i shouldn’t hesitate, question, or wonder if he was in charge.

That’s when he also continued saying i did good today, but trust has to be built more. That his role as HoH should be respected and … well… trusted. Then he ended with “be assured this would be the first test of more to come that would build the trust that he deserves. And the tests will continue until it seems the hesitation stops.”

i simply responded with “Yes Sir. Thank you Sir.”

i know he deserves my unwavering respect. i know we have agreed he is in control and my only job is to submit. i can do this! Even if my body parts end up sore in the process!

(and in case you are truly wondering, NO that pic above is NOT me.)

Hugs,

Marie