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Tag: married life

256 – Friday – my New (Old) Normal

This week is mostly done. And so far, i have held myself together … mostly. Okay, kinda sorta.

And so far, i have escaped a spanking. Mostly. Unless you count Maintenance Friday, then i definitely did NOT escape a spanking. (It hurt! It needed to. i truly needed it to. i was much happier afterward. Helped to screw my head on straight!)

But before this morning…. My emotions have been ALL over the place. i’ve been extremely happy for our son, extremely sad for me, and incredibly angry and annoyed with David.

But then also incredibly in love and happy with David too.

David has made me very well aware that i am NOT using the word Sir enough. He’s made me aware that i am “only a submissive when (i) want to be!” And he’s allowed me to be emotional. He’s allowed me to be a Mom who is sad and NOT the best submissive wife i desire to be.

But then he reminded me of the commitment I made to be submissive by spanking me today. On this Friday. We resumed Maintenance.

This week, another submissive blogger than i follow (and admire) blogged about respect. It stuck. She wrote some good stuff and it made me start thinking about how DISrespectful i have been this week.

She mentioned that the #1 thing men seek in a wife is one who shows respect to him. And related, the man wants her to show appreciation for him too. i did a google search and found a LOT of support for what she wrote. It may inspire me to write more about respect another day. But for now…. It reminded me today that i need to be more respectful.

i need to adopt and accept my new normal. And that new normal is more respectful, appreciative, and responsive to David! i mean, he is my #1! If it weren’t for him, i wouldn’t have a son at all to be happy or sad about!

In this new normal, i was spanked this Friday morning. Okay, so that’s the old normal too, but it was good to have a reminder that i need to: 1) respect for the way we do things is still the right way, 2) respect for David as the man of my life, and 3) my Son is in his place living his best life.

And that spanking is my grounder. i am spanked because i need it. i am a better woman, wife, and mother after i show respect by saying Sir, loving my husband, and ….

Getting naked in my living room every night now too. Yep, that’s part of my new normal too!

There’s good AND bad when things change. But accepting and even embracing the new normal is the way forward. In the nude. In my living room, with David staring at my boobs, touching my clit, and denying me the orgasm i seek.

i love it! My new and old normal!

Hugs,

Marie

220 – Fifty years and one day later

For my birthday, i received amazing gifts, time with family, great food, and LOTS of candles on my cake too! i am still very happy, very grateful, and very thankful too. i wake up today feeling renewed and refreshed.

As we were lying in bed last night preparing for sleep, David asked me if i had a good birthday and of course, i absolutely did.

Then he reached over, pulled the covers back, and exposed my pussy. Bare. Void of all hair and clothing, as usual. He said, “so should I let you come again?” and he started to play with my clit.

Just the idea of being able to possibly come again amped up my sexual mind (and clit) to the next level. Yes, THAT fast!

i responded with, “that would be the perfect end to the perfect day!”

And he proceeded to get me off with the touch of his hand alone. He didn’t stop with just one… again. He let me orgasm twice more.

He asked, “So was having to wait for an orgasm better than having it anytime, all-of-the-time?”

“Oh yes! For sure!”

Then he said, “I agree. You appreciated this day so much more than I think you would have otherwise. Not to mention, you’ve been a very good girl lately, except of course your miscue earlier today.”

** rewind…. It was almost time to eat (gorge on!) our Thanksgiving meal……

As he was finishing the cooking (i do NOT cook, unless of course we want to be poisoned, which we don’t!), i started to get out the plates and silverware. i set them on the counter, just under the cabinet they are stored in, which is right next to the stove. i wasn’t going to leave them there, but rather used it as an organizing and stacking space to get everything together at one time. He said, “You shouldn’t leave those there. I’m still cooking here.”

i looked at him and in an unintentional, snarky voice, i said, “i wasn’t planning on it!”

As soon as it left my lips, i was regretful and wished it hadn’t come out the way it did. He raised his eyebrows, turned his back where only i could see and hear him, effectively building a shield between us and the rest of family that wasn’t even paying attention anyway. And that’s when he said, “do you think that was the right tone to use?”

i immediately said, “No Sir.”

He said, “Then why did you speak to me that way?”

i said, “i didn’t intend it to come out that way. i am sorry Sir.”

He gave a nod to me then that conveyed the message, “because it’s your birthday AND thanksgiving AND family is around, your apology is accepted. But do NOT allow it to happen again or else you’ll find yourself Assuming The Position to be spanked!“

Y-E-S … i DID get that much out of his look! i know him THAT well.

i didn’t allow it to happen again and kept my actions and words in check the rest of the day.

And clearly, as we were heading to sleep, he hadn’t forgotten my words from earlier.

Even on my birthday… i am still his submissive wife. Always.

*** rewind done…. Back to our bedroom just before sleep……

When he was done playing with my pussy, i asked, “so will we back to no-touch and no-orgasm tomorrow? And if so, for what duration this time?”

His response was a matter of factly stated. He said, “I haven’t decided on either yet, but it’s really not your concern right now. Whatever I decide, I’m sure you will obey, correct?”

As i was put in my place (and i was A-OK with that!), i responded with the words he loves to hear, “Yes Sir.”

Then he asked me if i wanted to play with myself even more. When i said, “yes please,” he smiled, let out a small laugh, and said, “you may play and orgasm all you want… until midnight.”

And with that, i grabbed the vibrating rabbit dildo and got myself off just that quickly! He then said, “Do it again!” And i did. (Had to obey an order, right?? 😉)

With that, he turned out the light, turned over, said, “I’m going to sleep now. You have until midnight. Don’t keep me up or wake me up with noise, otherwise, Happy Birthday my love. My Good Girl!”

i responded with, “Thank You Sir.” And i opened my tablet to my favorite (literature) porn site with my rabbit inside me.

** side note: i prefer to READ porn over watching it. When i read it, it is a bit slower build up to the good parts and i can imagine myself as the submissive with David as the Dom. Not to mention, i think my imagination is far wider than the porn i have watched too! Here is my favorite site… in case you wanted to know: Www.Literotica.com

*** Another side note: at one point, i set up an account as an author and wrote a couple of stories. i submitted them for review (and hopefully to be published), only to find their editors were intense. They gave a lot of feedback, to which I didn’t much care for. Most of it was grammar and spelling, but also a bit more to the content too. Does anyone reading porn really care if you start/stop a paragraph after there is a “quote”? Or if the comma is inside the “quotation,” or not? << see the examples? Well apparently they do! And i guess maybe their readers do too!

So it made me mad and that’s what prompted this site! i wanted to write whatever… whenever… and however….and not have an editor! i am a bit selfish, aren’t i?? 🤣

i only lasted one more orgasm longer. i was so relaxed and contented with the day, i actually ended up falling asleep shortly thereafter.

This morning now i have NO idea if no-touch/ no-orgasm is in effect again, but i would be shocked if it’s not. i have learned a lot these last 17-days (yes, i was counting!), including how to pay more attention to Sir’s words, be a better good girl for him, appreciate orgasms more, sleep in a chastity belt (while being grateful to NOT have easy access to myself), and in the process….. growing deeper in my submissive mind too.

As much as I hate to admit it….. orgasm control/denial is a GOOD thing for me …. and Sir too. And we both know it now too!

**** while it won’t arrive that quickly …for my Christmas present, Sir agreed to let me order a Fancy Steel belt. i know it will be a good thing for both of us! He is going back out of town today (Friday) for 2-days, but this time it is just he who is going. He even commented, “if the FS belt were here already, I’d lock you in it and take the key with me to ensure you remain a good girl this weekend!” And my pussy got wet at the thought! The Chinese belts are ok for up to about 24’ish hours, but then it starts to chafe in odd places. Whereas the FS one shouldn’t do that as it is custom made to fit me with my measurements. So for longer periods of time, like 2-3 days …. Or really as long as we (or should i say HE) might desire…. The Fancy Steel belt will be much better for long-term wear!

Happy Day-After-Thanksgiving and my birthday!

Hugs,

Marie

217 – Fine line between passing and failing!

When we go out of town… i tend to press the envelope of acceptable behavior. i don’t exactly mean to. Most of the time, it just happens.

Our family, all 3 of us, is currently out of town for 3-days. i am making a concerted effort to do better this time. And yet, i’ve already had some (small) slip ups. Hopefully the small doesn’t add up to a lot though too!

And that’s just it…. Small things are usually done and taken all in good fun. It’s when it happens over and over, becomes intentional, or even habit forming that it’s not ok anymore.

We are visiting in town to visit a university that our son is interested in possibly attending, so we came to town on Sunday and will be here until Tuesday.

On Sunday as we were trying to find a place to eat dinner, David made a comment that went like this, “when I was online looking for a restaurant, there were like 10 open places on this Sunday night. Whereas other nights… there would be… like…. Well… a bunch.”

To that, our son repeated, “yeah. A Bunch!” where he said in a mocking but funny tone.

And i laughed.

Mostly at our son being a bit of a smart ass, but in a fun, kidding kind of way. Our son had no malice or ill will intended, so it was funny and we (our son and i) laughed at David’s expense.

To which, David said, “hey! I hear you laughing at me. You will get in trouble if you continue!”

Our son heard that and immediately assumed it was directed at him for his comment, so he said, “ohhh yahhhh I’m so not worried.”

But in reality, while David’s comment may have been directed at him, or may have been all in good fun too, i tend to think it was more of a warning to me. And, all in good fun and the spirit of the moment, i said, “yeah. i’m so NOT worried too!”

My response was said it in the truest smart ass way possible. It was when David looked directly at me and raised his eyebrows that he said, “you should be!” that i knew i was pressing the envelope of acceptability which prompted me to (wisely) close my mouth.

So while it was all in good fun and we laughed, i tend to (ultimately) take it too far and land myself in hot water by the end of every trip. (Aka: fine line… passing and failing!)

i need to be on better behavior (passing grades) now for the next 48-hours or else i may find my ass turned red upon our return home on Tuesday night.

Sooooooo everything you just read was written on Sunday night. Now, Monday morning …. wouldn’t you know……. i wasn’t even able to get this message completed and posted and i got my ass chewed out (verbally) by David in front of our son.

i forgot to bring some medicines (while not life-threatening, fairly important) with us on this trip. As such, now we are having to make some added stops at the pharmacy that were unplanned and out of the way.

Plus of course, it is costing us unnecessary money too because while we have insurance and it should be covered, because we have some in stock at home and it’s “between scrips” While the meds would ultimately get used and the money would ultimately be spent, it wasn’t something that was on our agenda or in the budget for this day either.

When it was discovered, David was extremely irritated and let me know it, in NO uncertain terms too. To which, i stayed silent. In the past, i’d have jabbed back and/or deflected blame, but that ALWAYS gets us into a fight too. So instead, while i did not think i was entirely to blame, i chose to hold my tongue.

Because the forgotten medicine is technically for our son, and he’s 17 and my husband is an adult too, i am not the only one who could’ve or should’ve thought to pack it. Therefore, i am not the only one who forgot it. That said, i am usually the one who takes responsibility and gets it packed, but this time, i did not. And of course, it is needed. And of course, then i was blamed. Ugh!

But rather than fighting about who’s to blame, which won’t change anything anyway (!!) i took the heat in the moment, but i am also now absolutely sure there will be punishment inflicted upon our return home.

Ugh…..

“What will be the punishment?”, you ask….

i have no real idea actually. But…. i am certain it is coming. i will be shocked if it doesn’t happen.

Soooo – now i have 36-hours to try to finish this trip without further issues!

Like i said, it’s all good fun…. Until it’s not.

So cheers to me trying hard to stay good, and yet, not quite making the passing grade! (Get the pun today – as we visit a University, i am thinking about grades and schooling! Apparently i need more schooling in order to have a passing grade!)

Hugs,

Marie

212 – Rules … can be sexy but not always

i often refer to “the rules” that we have in a generic sense. And i guess maybe because we don’t have them written down, our “rules” can maybe be considered fairly generic. i think sometimes generic is better, as it can be applied easily overall. And yet, we do have some rules that are fairly specific too.

Even the Constitution of the USA is fairly generic … or maybe general is a better word. The ability to apply it across the board makes it easier to use, and less likely to have any reason to follow up or amend it later.

So what are my rules? i don’t remember actually ever writing about them, so i will do so now…… and if i did before, we’ll, you’ll have a repeat!

But first, i will say… the rules apply 24/7, 365. There’s NEVER a time when they don’t apply. There may be times where the consequences for breaking them need to be bent a bit, but they ALWAYS apply.

1) i am to use the word Sir. Regularly. Often. With intentional meaning too. It is his preferred term of endearment from me as it shows respect and honor. Generally it is a sign of elevation to the one it is being said to and a lowering of the one saying it, so it’s pretty appropriate too.

2) Speak with respect… i am to show respect at all times. Never to yell or insist i am “right” and he is (therefore by default) “wrong”. i can and do make my wishes or opinions known but i always know to do it with respect in my voice, actions, and thoughts.

3) deferral. At the end of the day, only one of us will win. And it won’t be me. And this is ok by me. Honestly, it is. By “not winning” i don’t mean that then i lose though either. i am allowed to speak my thoughts and opinions and i may well have influenced his ultimate decision, but he does have final authority and decision-making power. Over everything. On occasion, he may tell me to make the decision about something but it was even then that ultimately he decided to give over that decision for me to handle in that specific situation. So at all times, i defer to his authority.

4) dress sexy. This means i am to be clean shaven. ALL over. Especially on my puss. Completely devoid of all hair. At ALL times. It also means rarely a bra, on approved occasion panties, and overall fitted, sexy clothes whenever possible. i do not wear frumpy Grandma clothes hardly ever. i say “hardly” because there are times… when feeling ill, doing yard work, etc. but that often.

And yes, the clean shaven puss is required. i wouldn’t say David “inspects” me, but he wants it the way he wants it and expects to find it that way anytime he touches it too. At first, it made me feel childish. Seeing my pussy without hair the first time made me feel strange, awkward, and honestly embarrassed. i happen to think that was part of his intention.

While no hair is practical in more ways than one, having me see my childhood pussy made me feel smaller again. Smaller than him, allows him to be slightly elevated, which goes to the previous rules… he is in charge, he is to be respected with Sir, to be deferred to, and makes the decisions. This was a physical and visual part of it come to life.

5) always ask to take a soaking, warm, relaxing bath. i told you about this in the last post but i will mention a bit of the particulars once more here too. Because i don’t do well having fully access to my naked body, especially when my mind slows down and my body is still, that i am tempted beyond my abilities. So he requires that i ask permission ahead of doing so, sometimes it is denied but frequently approved. And he checks on me regularly while there to ensure i am being good the entire time.

6) maintenance spanking on Fridays. i have talked a lot about this in separate posts also. But in the interest of keeping all the rules listed in one place, it’s here too.

i won’t talk much here because it is well documented throughout my blog, but I’ve will suffice to say, “practice makes perfect.” This is for both David and i. David has learned perfectly just exactly how to spank. That sounds silly writing it, but it’s true. When we first started doing domestic discipline, he was not good at it. It’s hard to know how much is enough, too much, or too little. When he first started out, he was so afraid of abusing me and going too far, that he absolutely went too little, As well, i also found the point that i know it’s effective but not too much …. Or too little.

Maintenance reinforces what we want. Keeps it in the front of my mind of what could be (even worse yet), if the submissive mindset fails to operate as intended. In other words, if/when these rules are broken, a punishment will ensue.

7) my body belongs to him. i do not touch myself sexually for pleasure without his permission. Well, officially i am allowed to “touch” and even edge myself if i wish to, but i am NEVER to orgasm without express authority AND even the edging is supposed to be with permission or at least me telling him that’s what i am doing. And sometimes he orders edging, which of course, i comply.

i have to ask to orgasm every single time, even at his touch too.

Frequently this last rule is the one i struggle with the most, which is why i write a lot of sex-charged posts from me. Mainly i struggle with it because i have come to realize that giving him authority and power in all things in our house and especially over me is truly a turn on for me.

i find his power is super sexy. i have always been more attracted to confident men, and ones who take charge and get things done especially. But of course, in current times it seems men are taught that a strong confident authoritative man is too much. Men are taught that they are to treat their wife as their equal, so lots of men squash down that part of them that is the confident, decision-making part, for fear of backlash if-when they let that out. But for me, when David is especially in his Dominant space, i go to my sub space too…. In or out of the bedroom. But of course, it gets me ALL wet all the same too!

And in my sub space, i am so turned on and completely intoxicated as he exerts his authority over me that i just want to orgasm right then and there on the spot. And when i need to touch myself (or try too hard to get him to touch me), i usually become focused on achieving that O a little too much, which of course, lands me in trouble where consequences ensue…. Which leads me to post here either about the sexual charge OR the punishment OR both!

My point though is that Domestic Discipline (DD) isn’t especially or necessarily about sex. It’s more about authority and control, but it often has a sexual-component to it too.

And specifically, as of late, i have now completed 4-consecutive nights of sleeping up close and snuggled in with Glory. (i do think that name fits.)

For me, wanting to encourage my Husband to fully take charge AND as i think about dressing sexy for him, i think the repressed inner-sexy-slut girl yearns to be let out. (Yes, women have been taught to be a “good girl” we are to be sexually chaste, but truly, we should be taught to let it out… especially for and with our husbands!).

So when David calls me his Good Girl that inner sexy-self does come out, and it all becomes so much about sex that it seems to be more of my focus.

AND LASTLY…. i’m not entirely sure if i would call this a “rule,” but maybe….

8-maybe-a-rule) if and when the rules are broken, to expect… and accept… the punishment that results. Frequently the punishment is a VERY-hard, make-me-regret-my-actions spanking. But it doesn’t have to be and isn’t always that either as the punishment can and often does reflect the transgression. (So is this a rule, or more of just what to expect when the rules are not followed!?)

i can’t think of any other rules, it if i have an “oh yah, i forgot…” moment, i’ll update this post.

So speaking of inner sexy-slut-GOOD-submissive-wife-girl… i need to go be and do all that now….. be a submissive wife …. While asking for the key to Glory to be removed in order to start my day! (For the record, officially Glory could stay on, as it’s actually able. But i really don’t like going to the bathroom and soiling her or me anymore than necessary either…. Yah, now i’m edging back toward chastity belt discussions… i’ll stop now. But just for now. 😉).

(How’s that for a Non-Glory filled post? Yah, ok… failed. Oh well. At least it wasn’t “just” about her either!)

Hugs,

Marie

203 – It’s officially NO-orgasm-vember!

Sometimes i play mind/DOM games with myself. In times when i am feeling particularly submissive but David is not quite as “DOM” as i particularly feel is needed, i play games with myself.

When i become “needy”…. i NEED a lot more domination and i need to have my full submission required… and tested.

That’s when i start the mind games with myself.

In some ways, and maybe in some people’s minds, this isn’t exactly appropriate to “play with myself.” After all, i should rely on David to know what’s best… for both of us. i admit, that is true. But i am still needy. And when i try to ignore my (extreme) need to be dominated, it tends to cause angst and distress…. Which leads to trouble. So instead of bothering him, i decide to play games with myself. Nothing (usually) that is against the rules, just amping it up a notch is all. (i know…..justification…. But.. still!)

i decided yesterday that i need to be reminded for the rest of the month of NO-vember (or at least until my birthday on the 25th), that my sexual pleasure is not up to me. i sometimes need to be reminded that my sexual neediness is not appropriate as i am supposed to be needy for him and not for me!

So …. i decided to deny myself any (ultimate) sexual pleasure but to tease myself a LOT for the rest of the month! i decided every day i will edge myself first thing in the morning. Then i will wear something to work every day under my clothes – rotating between an Anal plug, chastity belt, and pussy dildo. This would happen every-single-day, as a physical reminder to be submissive ALL day EVERY day. When i have sexual reminders, it carries from my sexual, to the physical, to my mind, where i say (and do) things more respectful, more kind, and less aggressive too.

My ultimate intent is that this will make me more sexually needy for Sir, while denying myself simple (and easy!) pleasures.

What i didn’t count on (or even think about) was that David may want to pleasure me for his pleasure…. Especially so soon.

Wouldn’t you know … 24-hours after i started this….. i had to tell him.

i was standing naked, in our closet after edging myself, deciding what to wear for the day, when he came in. He tweaked my nipple while asking me if i wanted a reward for being a good girl.

Of course i wanted that! But i had JUST edged and told myself to be a good girl and STOP. Literally stop. So i didn’t go over the edge, but also stop being so needy. And to prepare for a plug for the day. i was officially in my own submissive mind!

So while i didn’t intent to… i hesitated in my response. i hesitated too long and he heard the pause. He also saw the conflict in my eyes. And he said, “what?”

So i told him.

i said, “i don’t think i need to orgasm for the rest of NO-vember … or at least until my birthday. i think i have been too needy lately, so i thought i would deny myself that pleasure while not bothering you. But if you want to give it, then i will take it!”

Well …. He smiled and said, “huh. Well. Sounds reasonable. Lay on the bed anyway.”

He put his head between my legs and proceeded to lick his pussy until it was very-very-VERY needy. And then he stopped. He said, “I like your thinking. So in keeping with NO-vember, that’s enough.”

i was begging him for release. i said, “Please don’t stop Sir!” He smiled and said, “well, I have to say NO. After all, it is NO-vember!”

He lifted himself up where we were face to face. He was fully clothed as i was naked, and i tried rubbing against his pants with my needy pussy in hopes i’d be suggesting he should get naked too. Instead, he said, “DO NOT cum!” And lifted himself and then me off the bed, gave my ass a good smack and said, “now go dress for work already.”

So with a plug in my ass, i was off to work. Tomorrow it will be chastity, and the next an inflatable dildo in my needy pussy. Maybe it will stop being needy … but i kinda doubt it!

i suppose my mind games just got real for both of us. And now my birthday should be explosive!

Hugs,

Marie