Tag: d/s marriage

d/s marriage

Location, Location, Location

Written by Marie on October 2, 2025. Posted in DD, Deep Thoughts, Domestic Discipline, Dominance, Marriage, My Dominant Sir, my submissiveness, Submission, Submissive Wife. 2 Comments on Location, Location, Location

So much of D/s, specifically TPE, is about an emotional response to an activity. A dominant wants control over a situation and a submissive’s actions, as well as their feelings about what is happening to them. Location plays a big part of this. Doing a scene in a child’s bedroom can bring about different emotional responses from different subs. Some may take on a child-like persona; some may just be distracted by how uncomfortable they are around a bunch of toys (Can you guess which one I’d be?). Clean freak subs could be completely thrown from the dirty floor they are kneeling on. If that’s the response that the Dom wants, then great. If not, then it could ruin the scene.

We do not have a set dungeon space in our house. As much as Sir wants to have one eventually in a new place, I’m not holding my breath. So, when we play, we are not always in the same area, or even the same floor. And, I have found, that the various locations around our home bring out a strata of emotions, no matter what we are doing. Whatever the emotion, however, Sir has control over the space and what he wants me to feel throughout our play.

Bedroom

Because, obvious. I couldn’t really talk about BDSM scene locations without mentioning the bedroom. It is my favorite place to play. Most often the only place we have sex (unless the kids are not home or passed out). I just feel the most comfortable there. I find myself more willing to do anything and try anything because of how comfortable and safe I feel. Our room brings out my submissive pet nature and often my most sexual side. I have my little bed on the floor that I can see during our scenes.

I am always pulled into my submissive headspace when I am in the bedroom. Even if he is at work and I am just going in there to get laundry. I feel a wave of comfort and safety. It’s a gooey slavey place for me.

Sitting Room (First floor)

I generalized this as the first floor as we usually start in the sitting room, but I often end up crawling the entire space. Most of our scenes are played by the couch and coffee table.

This is a very high protocol space for me. I am often leashed when we play and there is more of a focus on service. I serve Sir drinks, often on trays. Sir wants me to be on my toes so that I can respond to his whims. And I feel that. I am comfortable, but always aware. I am rarely blindfolded, but often gagged, so that I can see his reactions and signals and react wordlessly.

This is a surprisingly comfortable space for me. I feel safe the strictness of it all. It’s not completely routine, but I am used to not being allowed to cum when we play in the sitting room. I don’t expect it anymore. I can focus on cock worship and general service. If I do get to cum, Sir usually takes me upstairs to the bedroom first (see why I like the bedroom).

Bathroom

This is a much more confusing area for me. I find I am able to transition my feelings when I am in the bathroom when he is not there with me (which is good). But I am very apprehensive in the bathroom with him.

Last night I had to squat next to him while he peed. Then he had me ‘clean off’ his penis with my tongue. It was hot. But there is always a sense of wondering what he is going to do. Was that it? Was there more?

This space holds a lot of dichotomy. Showering together (though we rarely get the chance), is a very sensual and calming experience. But when he uses me as a urinal I feel humiliated. Both can be positive, given the right context, but it is a little unnerving to not know which I will leave the bathroom feeling when he follows me in.

Basement

I hate our basement. I’m not sure I can clarify that enough for you. I hate it. It’s dirty, full of boxes, and we have to take a baby monitor down with us as it’s so far away from the sleeping kids.

I also hate it because Sir’s sadistic side comes out in the basement. He can string me up down there. He makes me walk along ropes with knots hitting my clit while hitting me with a crop. It sounds hot. In fact, I’m not sure I would have such a negative response if he did the same thing in our bedroom. But in this case, it is very much the location that brings about a specific feeling. Unease and dread.

The basement is cold. I’m naked, often gagged, and with way too much time to look at all the dirt on the floor and places where I need to organize. There is something about the space that puts me in a submissive, but almost kidnapped headspace. And I’m sure that is where Sir wants me to be. I am my most vulnerable down there. I’m uncomfortable and I will do anything to get out of there. Including take as much pain as humanly possible. Thankfully, he doesn’t take me down there often as he knows what an emotional drain it is.

As much as I would love to have a dungeon play space in our next home, I enjoy moving around our house when we play. The variety of emotions is helpful to me, and I think also to Sir, to enjoy our TPE in new ways. So check out all the rooms in your home to find the fun (and frightening) you can have.

*This is a look at how I feel in different spaces during specific play. Your results WILL vary. Play safe.*

Sexing Me into Submission

Written by Marie on October 1, 2025. Posted in Marriage, My Dominant Sir, my submissiveness, Submission, Submissive Wife. 3 Comments on Sexing Me into Submission

As part of our rework this weekend, Sir and I talked about how we have been having some issues with communication. Sir doesn’t feel that I have been open enough about my struggles with submitting to him during the work day and when I am alone with the boys. I think that I fight the urge to burden him with my stress while he is at work. But, by not being open with my horniness, stress, and desire to submit, he feels directionless in dominating me. And I have been getting more and more bitter on nights when I go to bed horny and frustrated. With the stress of the children and, recently, this job search, it just doesn’t work. I just get upset and mad at him, and everyone else; my fuse is millimeters long. Not good for a mom with young children. Not to mentioned depressed, stressed, and sleep-deprived.

So, in his infinite wisdom, Sir has decided on a different approach. Rather than sex as a reward he is going to use chastity as punishment. I know that that sounds like the same thing, but it is actually very different. Before, my orgasms were a reward for extremely good behavior. These were often given at the end of a scene or play, after he had cum. So, if for whatever reason, our time was cut short (remember, young children) my orgasm would be forfeit. I found it hard to stay motivated and often found myself getting snippy and bratty because of this. I felt unappreciated and that my service, both domestic and sexual, was being ignored.

And I hated feeling like that. I really approach my submission with a ‘whatever he says goes’ and ‘suck it up, buttercup’ attitude. So why couldn’t I accept his decision about my orgasms? Truthfully, I don’t think I know how to completely deal with my raised sex drive. Basically, since I got pregnant with our second child and I started researching BDSM my horniness has really come out. I thought it may go down after I gave birth, but it didn’t. And now that I have my depression under control, I don’t have anything else to ‘blame’. BDSM has given me the ability and the platform to be the, apparently previously hidden, sexual person I really am. And as much as I love that realization, I’ve not actually had to time to process it’s ramifications completely. Even after we got married, I would go weeks without an orgasm and be fine. I survived my first pregnancy and recovery without issue. This moody response that triggers after hardly 48 hours has been as hard for me to deal with as it has been for Sir. It’s not acceptable, but I haven’t found anything to fix it. So instead, Sir and I need to adapt.

Now my orgasms are not wishful thinking. His are.

If I preform tasks, like Sunday’s cleaning, I get a massive orgasm; or possibly many. Even if I don’t impress him, my orgasm isn’t necessarily taken off the table. But it will be quick. No time will be taken; no after cuddles provided. More importantly, now, are his orgasms. If I succeed in my ordered endeavors, I will get the chance to give him an amazing orgasm. On Sunday, if I had not followed his direction, he said that he would just jerk off in a towel. At first I was startled that he would be ok masturbating rather than using my body. But then I realized how upset I was at the thought that my behavior would cause him to have to do that. Immediately I wanted to do everything I could to avoid him having to use a towel. My orgasm wasn’t important, I just didn’t want him to not be given the relaxing orgasm that he deserves; that my body could give him. Like it was some sort of horror. It didn’t used to be. I remember, before BDSM, I would go to sleep and he would be horny and just jerk off so he could fall asleep. It never really bothered me then. But I remember this feeling of panic when he told me as he put my gag on Sunday night.

I never would have thought that ‘switching’ the orgasm focus could be so effective. And so immediate. And so lasting. Sir didn’t have a great Monday and turned in soon after the boys went to bed. So I came downstairs to write and finish up a few work bits and bobs. I felt good. Not bitter, and certainly not moody at the idea that he needed some rest. I was calm. Calm and happy.

Sex leads to submission, submission leads to sex. I think this new approach will be a win/win for both of us. Because I will do whatever I can to keep him away from that towel and reaching for me instead.

A Domestic Discipline Contract Is A Godsend

Written by Marie on February 27, 2024. Posted in Domestic Discipline, Marriage, Spanking, Wife Spanking. 5 Comments on A Domestic Discipline Contract Is A Godsend

i was lucky: the domestic discipline contract David and I established in the beginning was relatively easy for both of us. i consider myself fortunate enough to marry a man who was willing to explore his dominant role hand-in-hand with me, i never had to go through the dilemma that most women find themselves in.

In most households, it’s the women who start this conversation. i know that there are men seeking DD relationships also, but for now let’s look at the woman’s perspective. i think because it’s the interest in spanking that all of us share which starts the ball rolling, it’s some time before women realize that it isn’t just spanking but something deeper they want – a real disciplinary framework backed up by consequences. For most women, they want those consequences to be spanking; there’s just something cathartic about it that is unlike having privileges taken away.

Because of that, many people seeking advice in the past on domestic discipline have been told to provoke or ask for spanking, which is really bad advice. Unfortunately, because so there’s so much out there for people wondering “am I kinky?”, or who get turned on by the thought of being a spanked wife, but not so much for people focused more on how to start domestic discipline. For me, approaching David and asking him for what i felt i needed – specifically my need for structure through discipline in addition to the arousal, pleasure, and release i get from his spankings – was crucial to our setting off on the right path.

i’ve gotten comments from people who for one reason or another have gone halfway on this first step finding themselves unsure how to correct the feeling that they’ve somehow gotten off course. “I got up the courage to tell my husband that I want to be spanked and now he thinks I’m kinky. He just doesn’t understand. It’s not just about that!”

For men, who often take things at face value if his woman tells him that she wants to be spanked then that is just what that means to him and he’ll either think it a nice new “spice” in the bedroom or will simply tell her he’s not interested in playing those kind of sexual games.

While domestic discipline often incorporates spanking, spanking isn’t all what it’s all about. Domestic discipline is about a loving disciplinary framework worked out and agreed upon by both partners. In this relationship, rules are laid out that both can live with from a compliance and an enforcement standpoint. She has to feel comfortable obeying them; he has to feel they are important enough to enforce. He has to agree to follow through. She has to agree not to abuse her need to feel boundaries by breaking them intentionally just to get punished. This relationship shouldn’t feel like a parent/child setting but a system between two equals.

Domestic discipline is a contract between you and your husband, with rules that must be followed in order for it to work. For a contract to work, it has to be understood by both parties, who have to agree to it. If a contract is going to be sustainable, it has to benefit both parties.

It helps to have already established a relationship with your husband where you can tell him your feelings and insecurities without the fear of reproach or ridicule. It really helps if you’re in a relationship with a husand with whom you can communicate and whom you respect. If the relationship is already rocky, the last thing you want to do is implement a system where there is a power imbalance. If your marriage isn’t strong, shelve DD awhile and work on the relationship. You can always try to implement it later.

If you can talk to him, tell him that you have a deep, unmet need for limits and guidelines. Tell him that you feel secure living under the rules of loving authority. Reassure him that you aren’t looking for a daddy but more of a mentor figure who will shepherd you within a loving framework.

Give him time to absorb this. Remember that in our politically correct culture, a male-dominated home may seem almost like an alien concept. In the initial conversation you may not even want to bring up the subject of rules or consequences. Just let him know about your needs. Answer any questions he has as honestly as you can.

If he does understand and – best case scenario – this appeals to him then you will want to start brainstorming together about a possible rules and consequences. At this point you could bring up spanking. He may embrace the idea or he may really shy away from it because men are told they shouldn’t hit women. It’s a good idea at this point to let him in on what you already know, which is that quite a few principled men and women are living in arrangements where spanking and other consequences are used quite effectively. Again, give him time to absorb what you have said. If he’s so inclined he can solicit advice from some men who are already established as dominant partners in their relationship.

If he is open to the idea of a domestic discipline contract, shower him with love and appreciation. If he is reluctant, be understanding and patient. If he flat out refuses – worst case scenario – respect his feelings and try to imagine how you would feel if he were trying to convince you to discipline him. Some men are not interested in having a submissive wife, or in being a dominant husband and as much as it hurts, if you are in a relationship to stay then you must not push something on him that will bring him unhappiness.

Building a domestic discipline relationship is like building a house. It requires a good foundation of respect, understanding and patience. That foundation is your domestic discipline contract. If approached in a prudent manner dividends will pay off in the long run and you will both have a household that is the richer for it.

294 – Punished. Once, Twice, basically Three times.

Written by Marie on December 19, 2022. Posted in Uncategorized. 5 Comments on 294 – Punished. Once, Twice, basically Three times.

i received a pretty large discipline spanking yesterday. As with ALL my discipline, it is consensual. And i accept it with as much grace as i can muster in the moment.

That said…. It takes some kind of rare talent for what i managed to do.

While being spanked, i managed to get myself into trouble again. And if you want to be technical about it, the spanking in progress at the time was for a double error, making this one be the third! Three issues in one day!

So David kept right on spanking to fix all these errors at the same time. He used his new favorite tool… the riding crop. And from the first swat to the last, they were delivered with intention and strength that resulted in my attitude radically changing rather rapidly and swiftly too!

Who does that?! How does that even happen?!

HOW exactly does a submissive wife get herself in trouble a second time while in the midst of being spanked for the first bit of trouble she already brought on herself?!

Yah, well, like i said… i managed to do all this with some sort of special ability that i didn’t even realize i had! Just call me a regular super hero!

i didn’t do ANY of this on purpose. In fact, it was quite the opposite actually. After receiving the maintenance on Friday, i was none-to-eager to have a repeat or better performance from David with my butt as the target!

But. As i sit here writing, my rear end is still red and quite sore. i expect it to bruise by tomorrow and hurt for several days. i won’t lie though, i love David even more for having administered this discipline spanking with the swift action and exactness it called for. i need his leadership and with it sometimes the discipline too. Today, i got both!

What exactly even happened?

Earlier today, our son and i set out of the house doing errands and other related activities. At one point, David texted me and asked if i was near Sam’s wholesale club. “Yes Sir.

Then he texted, “Then can you stop and get paper towels, dog treats, and 409 cleaning liquid?” And despite the wording as a question, it really wasn’t a question at all. So my response was the same…. “Yes Sir.”

And we did. Only, as i walked around the store, i thought about the 409 and said to our son, “We don’t need to get that. When Dad & i were cleaning out the garage a few weeks ago, i saw we have about 2-3 large bottles of it.” So i didn’t get the 409.

THAT WAS MISTAKE #1. Do you know exactly what it was? i didn’t. But i was absolutely informed about it while being spanked!

Upon arriving home, i told David straight away that i did not purchase the 409. He said, “we do NOT have any. What we have 2-3 bottles of is Windex window cleaner.”

To which my heart sank.

i realized he was right.

It wasn’t 409 cleaning solution, but rather Windex window solution that we discovered how much we truly had when cleaning up the garage.

And THAT WAS MISTAKE #2. To which i was also told more about as i was being spanked too.

David was angry. He said, “I needed the 409 to clean my grill thoroughly. I told you I needed it and you said you’d buy it.”

“i am sorry Sir.”

“I think you know what you need to do now, don’t you?”

“Yes Sir. i’ll go Assume The Position now.”

As i (fully) undressed in our bedroom, it occurred to me that i was not *truly* naked as i was still in my chastity belt. i debated whether to take it off to be compliant with my directive to be naked when i am spanked. But then, i didn’t have permission to take it off either. Then i debated going back out to the living room to ask, so i would have a clear directive. i ultimately decided to leave it on, in its place, and climb on the bed to be in position before David came in. THAT CHOICE WAS NOT A MISTAKE….. THANK GOD I MADE ONE GOOD DECISION TODAY!

When Sir came in, i was laying in position…. Face down, pillow under my hips to offer up my ass to Sir and to make the spanking easier for him, with the choice of implements (crop, cane, paddle) all at the base of the bed at the ready.

He picked one up, and laid it gently on my rear. i could tell from the way he placed it there, he was being intentional about it. He wanted me to know and think about what exactly was about to happen.

And i could also tell from the way it felt that it was the riding crop. Then he started to speak to me. He said, “I have no idea why you didn’t buy the 409, as I told you to. Care to tell me why?”

“Because i was certain we had it already.”

And the riding crop was pulled back from my bottom, giving me another 2-seconds notice of what i was about to feel. i heard the crop whip through the air and the crack it made as it collided with my ass.

i was immediately brought into the here-and-now, where i was abundantly aware of how much the crop bites into my rear end. From that very first swat, all the way to the last, it HURT… a LOT!

That’s when Sir laid it back on my bottom and spoke again, “wouldn’t it have been better to ask me before taking it upon yourself to just not do as I asked of you?”

“Well…. yes Sir, i probably should have.”

And the crop came away and SMACKED right down again. This second swat landing in the exact same spot as the first, causing it to hurt that much more!

“But you didn’t.”

Smack a third time in the exact same spot again.

“Would it have been so difficult for you to have just bought it anyway? What ‘if’ we did have some at home already, what would be the big deal to have had more? What would have been the trouble to have more?”

“No trouble at all Sir.”

“And yet. You didn’t do as you were told. Instead, you decided to not do as you were told. Since when are YOU in charge and allowed to disobey me so blatantly and obviously like that? It was a rather simple request, to which you said yes to. Correct”

MISTAKE #1 was simply failing to submit. All i had to do was follow the directive. Regardless of what i thought of it or what we had at home already, it wasn’t my place to “just decide” to NOT follow his orders.

MISTAKE #2 was the fact we actually didn’t have any. And i was dead wrong about not needing to buy the 409.

He was right to ask for me to buy it, i was already at the store, even “if” we had some at home it’s not expensive and wouldn’t have mattered to have more. i should’ve just done as told, or asked for more clarity, but Just deciding to do as i pleased was NOT the right answer at all.

Sir said, “because you chose to deny my orders intentionally, you earned yourself a spanking regardless if we had it or not. You were not acting in a submissive way at all. You thought you knew better. But the fact that we didn’t have any at home has caused this spanking to be worse than it had to be because you were wrong in your decision to not buy it.”

His riding crop continued to rain down swats to my ass as i contemplated all that he said. Every time i felt it pull away from my bottom i cringed and held my breath waiting for it to find its next resting place. Some of the time it was in the exact same location and sometimes it moved, to a new one. Some of the time the swats landed swiftly and succinctly and sometimes he paused and drew it out. But every-single-one was delivered with intention to make its point…. And that it did indeed!

Smack. After Smack. After Smack.

i felt the anxiousness and anticipation of each swat about to land cause my body to start to sweat. That happens nearly every time. i think that’s part of why i don’t cry really. Because my mind and body is in a different place, trying to get through each moment of the here-and-now, rather than allowing myself to relax and just let out the emotions.

THIS IS WHERE I PILED IT ON…

THIS is where i managed to get into even more trouble in the midst of being corrected for the previous trouble!

“What will you do next time?” Sir asked me.

i spewed out words as fast as i could and said, “i will listen.”

MISTAKE #3… causing me to have an even longer and more prolonged spanking. Do you know what i did? Or rather what i did NOT do? (i did not know or realize in that moment.)

SMACK!

“What will you do?”

“i will do as you ask.”

SMACK – this one felt a bit harder, if that was even possible.

“What did you say?”

“i promise i will listen.”

S-M-A-C-K.

“Want to try again?”

And i practically yelled out, “i will do as i am told. … …. … … SIR”

There it was. The lightbulb went off. i failed to show him the respect he deserves and has reminded me over and over again. i failed to say SIR.

SMACK SMACK SMACK (yet even MORE intensity).

He then held the crop still against my bottom again and he spoke quite calmly saying, “I don’t know why using the word Sir is so difficult for you! I expect to hear it, and you know it. So NOW this spanking has to be even longer than it already was.”

And he continued to reign down swats with the riding crop onto my sore rear end for a bit longer.

Now i started to feel the same heat rising from my bottom, all the way to my face. (Sir has NEVER spanked me anywhere except my ass, so the heat was not from his hand or the riding crop. It was all within me.). i know this is the first thing that happens when tears are nearing the surface.

i was finally starting to relax into the spanking and to accept it. The anxiousness of feeling each swat was starting to fade. i heard my mind telling myself, “Just allow it to happen. Just relax into the knowledge… and pain from the crop… that Sir is in charge. He loves you enough to teach you a lesson. Allow the tears to form!”

He asked me several times to repeat the word “Sir,” as he continued to smack my ass. i did so. He told me i would do well to comment the word to memory.

It was just a bit more and David stopped. He told me we were done and he waited for me to rise up onto my knees and face him, he always does that. i think i he wants to ensure i am ok, but also for me to see his face and trust that this is now forgiven too.

It’s also where i look into his eyes and with a humble heart, i express my thanks to him. He has never required that i do so, but i do. i want to be sure to let him know i did indeed accept his discipline. i never want him to think he has forced this on me or that this may be somehow misconstrued into an abusive situation. It is not. i am always accepting and thankful for his leadership and guidance… and the discipline too.

That’s when he kissed my lips and expressed his love. Then he left the room and i took a few more minutes to collect myself and re-dress.

As i did so, i decided i needed to go to the store and buy the 409 as he had previously asked. Not only did indeed to have a sore bottom and a regretful disposition, but i needed to make it right by doing the actions requested of me too.

And i did just that. After coming out with my shoes on, i said to David “i will go to the store and buy the 409 you requested now.”

He smiled and then said, “Good idea…. Of course… it would’ve been a lot easier to have gotten it the first time you were there… would it?!”

“Yes SIR.” << i am going to be using that word a lot more now!

i never did cry during the spanking. Frequently i cry AFTERWARD when i stop and think about it all, as that’s when everything relaxes and the tears start to flow freely. i’m not entirely sure if David even knows that happens or not. It’s ok either way.

But as i drove to the store… listening to nothing but my own thoughts…. the tears slowly dripped down my cheeks. i wasn’t crying from the pain of the spanking, although the heat between my butt and the car seat was real (!), but rather the fact i wasn’t the submissive wife i wanted to be. i know all is forgiven now, but i was thinking about all that transpired and the remorse was real.

David was right. If I had just done as instructed, all of this could’ve been avoided.

i will learn from this and do better.

PS.. The chastity belt…

Oh… and in case you are wondering…. The Chastity Belt stayed on throughout. It wasn’t even a second thought for David or me in the midst of the spanking.

Afterward, i told him about my quandary of whether to take it off, or ask, or to just leave it on. His words were, “you made at least one good choice today. If I want it off, you will hear me tell you so.”

After i was home from the store and after dinner, i asked if I could take the belt off and take a soaking/warm bath. Sir said yes. And when it was done, i inquired if it needed to go back on. He said, “while you have been disciplined today and all is forgiven, you have NOT earned the right to play or be played with.”

He continued, “If you think you don’t have the willpower to abstain, then yes, put the belt back on. But I think you’ve learned your lesson today and don’t wish another immediate spanking on top of the first, ….. because if you disobey me and play with yourself anyway, I will spank you again. So the choice is yours….”

i chose to leave it off. But in the middle of the night, as i turned over in my groggy sleep, i felt the covers cross slightly over my clit bringing hyper awareness to my mind and turning me on. i wanted to rub my clit SO badly. i debated whether i should have put on the belt already or even getting up to do it at that moment, but decided to try to ignore it. It took awhile to go back to sleep, but i did abstain. (Phew!)

Now i am off to find some cotton pants to wear to work today…….

Hugs,

Marie

290 – Absent in spirit

Written by Marie on December 12, 2022. Posted in My Dominant Sir. No Comments on 290 – Absent in spirit

We have been busy.

With Life.

After the Kentucky trip, we have had….

A family wedding in Nashville (that was outdoors in 30 degree weather. Oh my!),
Thanksgiving (which was lovely and low key),
My 51st birthday (i’m not ashamed or embarrassed about admittedly my age),
Trip to see our son in college (nice weekend with him),
My firm’s Christmas party (at our house with 22-people here, David cooked amazing food for it too. i didn’t make him, he wanted to. It was his gift to us and vice versa.)

All that in the course of 4 1/2 weeks.

All that on top of getting ready for Christmas with decorating, buying and wrapping presents, and of course…. Work.

It’s been unseasonably warm in our area. It’s normally 40’s lows to maybe 60’s highs. We’ve been having 60’s for lows and 80’s for highs.

While i love the hot weather, not everyone does. It’s sooooo much easier to be sexy in warm weather clothes than cold weather clothes.

Think about it… in the cold north, a conversation probably goes like this….

Him: I want to fuck you.

Her: oh yeah Sir?! I want that too.

Her again: just give me 10-minutes.

Him (annoyed): uhm. No. Don’t tell me I have to wait! NOW!

Her: well Sir, since it’s so cold out, I have 16-layers of clothes on and have to take them all off. That’s going to take awhile.

Lol. Yeah. So. NOT sexy.

So warm weather allows me to wear tank tops or a low-cut shirt, no bra, no panties… and be undressed in no time flat.

i can also sleep naked, or be in the house naked, much easier in warm weather.

Generally speaking, i feel way more more sexy in warm weather than in cold weather.

But i would say that David has been absent in spirit lately. With so many “life things” happening, he hasn’t had the least bit of focus on me, regardless of what i have on or do not… or whether the temp is cold or warm! (Yes, i am fully aware of how selfish that sounds!)

Now that’s not to say he’s not talked to me, done (vanilla) things with me, nor has he been entirely or literally gone.

He’s just not held me accountable or maintained our Domestic Discipline dynamic. At all.

i have been trying to NOT get anxious, upset, or angry about the (perceived) neglect. i know i am loved. i know i am not ignored, forgotten, or neglected. But it feels like it to me. And sometimes what we perceive becomes our truth.

i just wish he’d hold me accountable. i just wish he’d stay the course of our dynamic. i just wish he would bent me over his knee already.

i know i need to tell him. But HOW to tell him has been problematic.

If i……

Brat…

….. Which is where i become cranky, disobedient, disrespectful, and …. Challenging, that is unbecoming. It also, usually, just makes David annoyed and/or angry.

i don’t chose to be a brat quite as literally as it may seem. It’s somewhat like having a bad day. You don’t start out saying, “hey, I want to have a bad day today.” And yet, sometimes it just happens anyway.

And to take that even further, when a bad day does happen, sometimes you think, “I am NOT going to let this continue.” And yet it just does.

So being “bad” and throwing a temper tantrum isn’t the right answer, but admittedly, i have done a bit of this. Yet David has let it go and not held me accountable.

What exactly have i done? Well…. i decided he hasn’t paid ANY attention to my puss. He doesn’t seem to care if i touch it or not. i decided to NOT shave it until he pays attention to it.

On Saturday, he decided to lay me on the bed, spread my legs, and lick me to orgasm. (Yah, i know this is paying attention to me, which is exactly what i am complaining about. But. This is the one and only sexual type interaction we’ve had in nearly 6-weeks.).

He didn’t even comment about the hair. i dared him to. He didn’t. He should have. It was annoying that he didn’t.

Top from the Bottom…

…. i’d just tell him what to do, or maybe tell him “what you should do in this situation is….”

Turn me over and spank me, like the spoiled brat that i am acting like.

Or stand me in the corner until further notice.

Or (fill in the blank)…..

But i don’t want to tell him what to do. i want him to enforce the rules, do maintenance spankings, tell me to wear the Chastity Belt, or WHATEVER…. because he wants to do it and NOT just because i am telling him to do those things.

Try talking to him…

Yes, i know. THIS is the most logical. But i am already thinking he’s just going to hear my words as Topping because i think i hear it that way already too.

i can hear the conversation now….

Me: “you aren’t holding me accountable.”

Him: “ok. We’ve been busy.”

Me: “yes, but you should….”

Okay… right there…. i am Topping from the Bottom. Telling him what he’s NOT doing and how to DO something (anything) better

Send him a link of this post…

But that’s likely just another version of Topping from The Bottom.

SUMMARY…..

i am getting increasingly annoyed and unhappy…. Which is making me cranky. Which is probably going to lead to me being a Brat… even more. Just to get his attention.

See a pattern here? See the circular reference?

Ugh.

Suggestions?

Until then… no matter hot weather or not, i will wear what i want, when i want!

Hugs,

Marie