Orgasm Control Archives - Page 2 of 2 - Loving My Disciplined Life -

47 – Submission is easy… until it’s not

Written by Marie on February 1, 2020. Posted in Chastity Belt, Domestic Discipline, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Denial, Punishment, Spanking, Submission, Submissive Wife, Wife Spanking. No Comments on 47 – Submission is easy… until it’s not

Most days, submission is easy. Some days…. not so.

SUBMISSION – it isn’t a difficult concept really.

RULES = FOLLOWED = REWARDS

RULES = NOT FOLLOWED = PUNISHMENTS

And the rules i have, just really aren’t a big deal. i mean, David is fair and reasonable. And he doesn’t demand much. In fact, if i were in charge, i’d have more rules and require more compliance… but that would lead to bigger rewards and especially more punishment too!

But i think, in some sense anyway, because David is sooooo very reasonable, i probably use that to my advantage. i don’t exactly think this through mind you. It’s not like, i’m over here going, “Hey, let me take advantage of Sir to my benefit and get what i want under the guise of submission.” i’m NOT thinking that what-so-ever! But maybe, on some level, that may be kinda-sorta-what’s happening – i dunno?!?!?!

So what am i specifically rambling about?!? Okay – here’s the message of the day….

David had to go out of the country for work for almost a week. And where we was at, is/ was 7 hours ahead of me. i tend to get sexually wound-up in the evenings, which was in the middle of the night where he was. i have a “RULE OF SUBMISSION” to ask permission to masturbate and orgasm. But HOW can i do that when he’s sleeping?!

Okay, you probably know what happened…..

Y-E-S – okay, i did it! Without permission. Twice. Okay, so maybe once was a ‘oops, i should have asked’ but the second time…. no excuse, right? well…… i happen to agree. But i felt like i ‘needed‘ it. There are times when i feel like i just HAVE to cum….RIGHT….NOW. And i don’t know how to control that. And when i couldn’t ask… well… i just let things happen. uncontrollable.

And the day before David came home, i confessed. He said very little. When i asked about what he was thinking or why he hadn’t said anything, his response was, “There’s nothing I can do from here. And when I get home, I will deal with this. Until then, we will not discuss it.”

Yikes.

Okay, i deserve it.

When he got home… my ass was turned VERY RED. i got a spanking that hurt-like-hell. We do have yellow (slow down) and red (STOP) emergency words, but i have NEVER used either one and i have ZERO plans to EVER do so. i figure if i ever get close to that trouble, i will use it, but honestly, i deserve the punishment at the time i get it. Because, again, i don’t really get into trouble much and when i do get in trouble, David is very reasonable. And again, i’d be much more harsh than he is if i were in control.

He made me stand in the corner. Naked. And wait.

And wait.

And when he came to the bedroom, he said, “Assume the position”. Which means i stand with feet on the floor, hands on the bed, and ready to be spanked. i did.

He got the paddle out. i could hear it. i cringed. But he couldn’t see my face because he’s behind me. And yet, i’m accepting. i know this is going to hurt.

And he hits my ass about 10 x’s all over. Warm up. Already it hurts and this is JUST a warm up.

And then he pulls back and paused. i cringed more as i knew it was about to start.

S-M-A-C-K. WOW. It came hard.

Again, and again and again. And it happened so many times i lost count. He doesn’t make me count. But i do. Somewhere around 25 i lost complete count and had to focus on not saying yellow. i didn’t want to say that at all. i knew it was earned fair-and-square.

And finally, when tears were in my eyes, he stopped.

When he asked me if i was regretting my actions, i had to stop and think. i knew the right answer was ‘yes’ and in THIs moment i was…..but frankly, when i get horny and feel like i’m not in control of my emotions, i would do it again. And again. Without asking. So i told him that i want to be regretful, but i don’t know that i am.

David decided that if i can’t help myself, maybe i need to be helped.

There’s preventative and detective type of punishment. Detective is after the fact getting punished. And then there’s preventative, as in, can’t get in trouble if you aren’t in that position in the first place.

So …. David told me i need preventative help…..

And now we are investigating and looking into locking female chastity belts. i am equally excited and fearful of this.

But so far – the ones we’ve found are SO DAMN EXPENSIVE! (HOLY CRAP!!!).

Anyone use or wear or buy these? Any you’d recommend? That are effective AND price-conscious?!

38 – Orgasm control sucks

Written by Marie on August 7, 2019. Posted in Domestic Discipline, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Denial, Punishment, Submission. No Comments on 38 – Orgasm control sucks

So ever since i asked for a spanking, David has become ever the leader in our house. We had gotten away from DD … not from an intentional discussion or decision, but really just from “life” getting in the way.

And i realized how much i needed it, and i missed it, and i wanted it back. So i asked to be spanked. And i asked to go back to DD and him being the leader of our house. And ever since that day a month’ish ago…..

Now ….. he’s R-E-AL-L-Y in control.

And i didn’t appreciate how much control i had.

Specifically over my ability to pleasure myself and to orgasm.

But he wants control over my mind AND body. And in my head, i’m like, “YES! i want you in control.” But in my nether parts, i’m thinking more like, “he’s a man. He likes to be pleasured and i can get what i want by giving him what he wants”.

i tried hard to seduce Sir tonight. i was horny and wanted to have him. So i started by flirting. i did ask if i could kiss him. (He said yes). So i started out correctly. Then i sat beside him, took my top down, and started rubbing on him. Starting at his chest and working down.

And he grabbed my hand and said, “stop being so aggressive.”

i smiled and said, “i’d like to make you happy.”

He responded with, “NO, you want to make YOU happy.”

He knows me too well.

So he told me to stop or else i’d regret it. i didn’t. i kept on.

And he stood up and went and got the paddle.

He laid back down on the couch and looked me square in the eye with the paddle in hand and said, “are you sure you want to continue? You will regret it!”

So i stopped. And pouted. He told me to stop being a brat or else i’d regret that too.

Great. i’m turned on and can’t get him turned on. In all fairness, he WAS watching a tv show when i “got aggressive.”

So i sat on the floor next to him and waited. Topless of course.

When the second commercial came on, he said, “stand up.” So i did. And he said “because you made better choices in the end, i’m going to reward you. Show me that pussy.” So i lifted the nightgown i had on (a sexy one, not your grandma’s!) and because that was the only thing i had on, his tongue connected with my parts.

And oh-my…. i was in heaven and my eyes rolled back in my head. And when i asked if i could cum, he pulled away and said, “no.” And he was DONE.

What?? You are done?? You can’ttttttt be! NO… don’t stop…..

He said, “discipline. We need to work on it. With orgasms AND you’re ability to follow instructions the first time. Now go sit down and let me watch my show.”

So while i respect him, i don’t always listen to him. At least not the first time anyway. Ugh.

And he’s probably right about me needing to learn to listen the FIRST time, to follow directions, and understand great things come to those who wait. (Ok, fine…not “probably right”…. he IS right. Happy? i admitted it even to you!)

Additionally, there’s more than one way to get a point across. He didn’t have to use the paddle, just the sight of it and the orgasm control was all it took to have it’s full effect.

But now i reallyyyyyyyyyy want to cum.

When i told him that, he said, “maybe tomorrow.”

i’m going to struggle to wait til tomorrow. And i can only hope that tomorrow will be the day.

So that’s that. i officially don’t like orgasm control. But i do like David being in control…. i really do. i love him and our marriage…. leadership, denial, and punishments too. Really…. i mean it….punishments too – because while it hurts, it makes me show respect and submission and that is the biggest turn on of all!

Hugs,

Marie

23 – Cum on command AND only with permission

Written by Marie on November 18, 2018. Posted in Forced Orgasm, Uncategorized. No Comments on 23 – Cum on command AND only with permission

Can you cum on command? i’m not allowed to touch myself without permission, and neither am I allowed to cum without permission. In fact, i’m officially in ‘orgasm training’. For anyone not familiar with that, it means i ask permission to cum and i can only do so when Sir says “yes, you may cum now.”

The idea is something like Pavlov’s dogs and i’ve even read stories about women who can ‘cum on command’. They hear the words “yes, you may cum now” and even if they are in the grocery store, not being aroused or touched, cum on command.

i’m not entirely sure how i feel about that. i want to be submissive, but cumming in the grocery store on command? hmmm.

On the one hand, that’s hot. That’s erotic. And that is submission at its finest! i mean, even your BODY submits. Not JUST your mind.

On the other hand, i’m not a dog. Literally speaking here. i’m NOT a “Pavlovian dog”.

For what’s its worth, i’d say i cum MORE now than i did before. Maybe it’s because David knows i’m not doing it on my own and maybe giving him that control is even more of a turn on?! i dunno, but this is one happy sub.. until i cum in the grocery store without being touched!

You? Anyone want to cum on command? Hot and sexy or dog-like?

Hugs,

Marie

14 – Pleasure to pain.. in the same day.

Written by Marie on September 26, 2018. Posted in Domestic Discipline, Forced Orgasm, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Denial, Spanking, Submissive Wife, Uncategorized, Wife Spanking. 1 Comment on 14 – Pleasure to pain.. in the same day.

So i’ve had an interesting submissive day today … pain to pleasure…. in a mere 12 hours time too!

Let me tell you about my day….

i typically work from home on Wednesdays. i am never able to get done what i need to at the office so i work from home every Wed to try to make up for it. And the place won’t fall apart without me for ONE day. But today i had to go in for a meeting at 10:00. So i drug my feet and went there “late” (at 9:00).

Orgasm Control Training

But before i went, David took our son to school. And we recently – like this week – jointly decided we want to start doing (my ) orgasm control at his discretion.

Since the DD decision, i’ve had to ask to masturbate but he hasn’t told me when i can or can not cum. Until now.

i’ve read a lot of blogs now about it and there are people who can “cum on command“. The blog post said, “Right there in the middle of the bread aisle”. Interesting. i’m not sure i want to cum in the bread aisle, but i thought it was an awesome display of submissiveness, so i wanted it. YES, i asked for it!

Just a sidebar – i don’t know WHAT i was thinking when i agreed to this. In fact, it was MY IDEA! Sir said, “Careful what you wish for….” and i was like, “NO, i really want to do this for you, for us, and as a show of my submissiveness”. WELL, in my HEAD that sounded awesome, and frankly, coming out of my mouth it did too. And i was PROUD of my decision.

For about a whole minute.

That “Minute” was THE MINUTE i wanted to orgasm and Sir said no. (WHAT?! NO?!? You are kidding me, right?!?!).

But i digress… because THAT MINUTE was a few days ago…. so let me get back to this morning…..

So David took our son to school. He told me to “Lay on the bed, with the rabbit toy, and watch porn. Bring yourself to the EDGE and stop. DO NOT CUM. And do this the entire time i’m gone and i’ll tell you when to stop”.

Our son’s school is 20-minutes away – one way. So for 40-minutes i had to watch porn, and use the vibrator on myself but DO NOT CUM.

(REALLY, what was i thinking?!? Is it too late to retract my request to submit to Sir THIS MUCH? Maybe i could just submit with my clothes ON!?!?! YES?!?!?! LOL. Okayyyyyy…. fine… doing this thing).

When David got back, i was so insanely turned on. i could only hope that he’d allow me to cum … soon… like NOW.

My fear was that he’d not let me cum at all and i’d have to ‘get dressed and go to work now.’. But, he did not disappoint. He entered the bedroom and asked me if i had came while he was gone. i was like, “NO, i promise i haven’t, but Pleaseeeeeee Sir, may i cum now?”

NO.

ME: WHAT?!?! PLEASE!?!?

And he touched my clit. it was SO enlarged and swollen i almost jumped off the bed with the slightest touch. Then he took the porn away. Then he took the vibrator away. And he played with me himself. And he said, “CUM NOW”. And i did.

And then i went to work.

The next thing i know, i go from pleasure to pain…. in the same day.

THEN THE PADDLE

To tell you WHY i got paddled first…..

Sir and i have the same profession. He works for a firm and i work for myself. And from time to time, he helps me get through busy times at work by doing some review work for me. (He volunteers and i always take him up on it. He knows i need the help and he has the time and the skill set, so it is a win-win. And i love him for it!). So today was one of those days.

He reviewed two projects that were substantially the same, and when i got home, he was talking to me about the results. Well, i got confused about which project he was talking about because – it seemed to me anyway – that he was talking back and forth about both of them and i couldn’t keep up with the conversation.

Now, you’d think HE would be frustrated with me… like a “Keep up!” kind of comment. But i was frustrated with him! i had to say, “Are you talking about X or Y? i have no idea what you are talking about!”. And then he started talking. And i said with a very annoyed tone, “WHAT are you talking about?! i’m not listening until you clarify because i’m confused!”

So – WHAT i said was probably not allllll that bad — but the WAY i said it was so completely off base it wasn’t even funny. As soon as it came out of my mouth, and i felt the annoyance in my body language and realized how it sounded, i knew it was wrong.

But Sir didn’t say anything, so i acted like nothing happened.

We finished our convo and i was about to head outside to play ball/ fetch with the dog.

And that’s when he stopped me and said, “Do you think you were annoyed with me?”

Me: “Uhmmm…. yes Sir”.

Him: “Go to the bedroom”.

Oh geez – here we go….

i dropped my pants and put my hands on the bed, head down, feet on the floor, spread shoulder-width apart.

And i heard the bedside stand dresser draw open and close. The Paddle. Here it comes.

SMACK.

Me: (OUCH) —- “Please Sir, i’m sorry. i spoke to you poorly and let my frustration get the best of me. i will not let….

SMACK.

ME: “that happen again.”

SMACK.

Him: “WHY are you lying to me?”

SMACK.

Me: “What do you mean? Please Sir…. i promise”

SMACK.

Him: “I seriously doubt that you will ‘not let it happen again’”

ME: “Sir, i will do my best to….”

SMACK

ME: “… not let it happen again.”

SMACK.

ME: (Tears in my eyes, squirming….), “Thank you Sir”

Him: “That’s what I was waiting for.”

And he put the paddle away and held me in his arms and told me i was a Good Girl.

Back to Orgasm Control

With that, standing naked in the bedroom and in his arms, he reached down between my legs and put a finger inside me.

And said, “CUM NOW”.

And he pushed two fingers in and out and i grabbed his arm and held on to not fall.

And i came. Twice. THAT fast.

In “THAT MINUTE”… or “THIS MINUTE” … or “NOW”.

Conclusion:

NO matter what, through pleasure AND pain, and back again, i am his and he is mine. i will always submit to him and he will always control me.

And i welcome tomorrow….

With a sore, red ass.

Hugs and Kisses ~

Marie