28 – Day dreaming
I daydream… a lot. Especially about DD or maybe it’s D/s. I dunno. What I know is that I daydream way more about things that Sir could do and he doesn’t.
I debate if/when i should tell him about these daydreams. Because I think about things he could do to assert husband dominance over me. But if I tell him, wouldn’t that be “topping from the bottom”?! Wouldn’t it be me telling him how to do his job?
Let me be clear…..I’m NOT saying what he does is bad, it’s just not to the extreme levels that if i were in charge that i’d do to him. So I day dream about things he might could/ would do to me!
Give you an example? okay…..
So he cooks, i clean. That’s been our ‘thing’ since … well…forever. So as he’s cooking, i get to do “whatever” i want. And typically that’s watch t.v. Because i can. i wouldn’t allow it if things were reversed.
i day dreamed tonight about him saying, “While i cook, you need to ……… “…. what would you say? What would the BLANK be? FILL IN THE BLANK FOR ME!?!?!
And then i dreamed about how when he was eating, that i shouldn’t be. That he should have made me wait. And…… well….. the last one, i asked you what you’d suggest, this one i’ll tell you what i was thinking.
We have a teen son. So i can’t be naked, kneeling, etc. But there can be things done right under his nose… like he could have applied nipple clamps and made me “act normal” over dinner. And when i wasn’t able to maintain composure for the duration, tell our son “your mom is acting weird. Why is that Mom?” and i’d (of course) have to lie… which would earn me a spanking of monumental proportions after the fact.
And when it was time to spank, it would DEFINITELY make me cry. i’d be like, “we do NOT lie in this house!” SMACK!
And speaking of spanking… or discipline…. i’d be like… SMACK…. SMACK… SMACK. And when that ass was BRIGHT RED…. i’d make me stand… naked… in the corner. Hands behind the head. And nose touching the wall. And ass sticking out. And i’d make me stand there for 10-minutes.
At the end of 10, i’d make me get back on the bed with the ass in the air. And ready for “round 2”. And repeat it ALL-OVER-AGAIN.
And i’d force it to happen over and over again … until finally the tears fall … heavily! And until i was begging to please stop. And then beg some more.
As i type all this, i feel wet at these thoughts. i wonder if i should tell Sir this is what he can (and should) do… but again… wouldn’t that be ME being in charge of ME?!? Maybe Sir will read this and take my lead…. but isn’t that being passive-aggressive now?!?
Hmmm…. no idea how to proceed. i guess i’ll just keep telling you all my thoughts. And one day i’ll figure it alllllllll out. 🙂
~ Marie