273 – The 50–50–90 Rule

i wrote 99% of this last night… on Saturday. I fell as.eep and didn’t get it finished. So this morning, Sunday, i am finishing it…..

i’m sure many of you remember Andy Rooney: journalist, humorist and a mainstay for years on 60 Minutes. He developed the 50-50-90 Rule: “Anytime you have a 50–50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90 percent probability you’ll get it wrong.”

That pretty well sums up my state of affairs this weekend!

It is currently Saturday night and we have been visiting our son this weekend at his college campus. We are in the hotel tonight, will get breakfast with him in the am, and head back home tomorrow. We should be home around 1-2pm’ish.

The visit has gone well overall. We brought my sister and her son, my nephew with us too.


i have still managed to earn myself a spanking. i think. To be delivered upon arriving back home.

i knew the vey second David was mad. i am pretty sure everyone else was aware too. But instead of yelling or getting into a fight, he texted me.

“Be prepared when you get home”

Not even an explanation of what i needed to be prepared for, as it was understood. Ugh. Of course. But seriously, i think it was unfair! Whatever!

Trouble. i feel like it went looking for me and tripped me when i wasn’t even looking!

So let’s back up to yesterday morning…. Friday. Usually that means maintenance.

We were intending to work a half day and then leave town. So when i asked David if he was intending to deliver a maintenance spanking (i needed to know if i was to Assume The Position or was able to get dressed for the day), he got a devious look about him.

He directed me to sit on his lap. (i was naked). As he spread my legs and started to play with a nipple in one hand and my clit in his other, he said, “when we get home, you’ll either get to enjoy the remainder of the afternoon naked, where we will both get you to orgasm as much as you can. Orrrrrrr. You will have a spanking worthy of you calling ‘red.’ The choice is yours, and you’ll earn one or the other based on your behavior this weekend.”

So i have a 50-50 chance, with a 90% probability of getting it wrong!

He finished with, “but make no mistake, we will lock you up for the rest of October as soon as orgasm or spanking is complete.”

With those words complete and his fingers never slowing their assault on my exposed clit, i was begging to orgasm as he got me so worked up so very quickly! His response was a shrug and a “ok…. I guess you can….” followed by a slight laugh.

The water works let open and the orgasm flowed through! And it was amazing too!

That was all yesterday, on Friday. i didn’t do great yesterday, but i wasn’t in trouble either. David said i was “entirely too bossy.” i heard that more than once too.

i didn’t mean to be bossy but no one was making any decisions or even making suggestions. So i did.

i have found that in a group of people, if someone steps up and leads, i am good. And when there’s a lot of people in a group with everyone being noncommittal, then it irritates me and i step up and decide. i mean, when someone asks you an opinion, why don’t you answer?!

For example, “where do you want to eat lunch?” Crickets. No response. Did you hear me? Should i repeat myself? Are you thinking of an answer? Anyone home?!? Helloooooooooooo????

That’s when the options get listed out. You can pick from x, y, or z. Crickets. STILL. Seriously? At least say, “I don’t care.” But NO answer at all is just rude, in my opinion.

Yesterday morning, no one was deciding much of anything. So i got irritated, but that only happened after David started out walking towards an entire street of restaurants. It was not terribly loud outside, but traffic and street noise, combined with being in a (bit) of a spread out line/spacing, made it difficult to talk much at all too. i assumed he had a plan and we were all following, which was fine.

Suddenly he stopped, let us close the gap and said, “where do you want to go?” Seriously?! You are going to ask us now after we are nearly somewhere?! We all assumed you had a plan. And NO ONE responded!

Our son had already previously declared his only need was that he “just wants coffee!” and no one had responded then either for any other thing.

So in my best NON-irritated voice yet rather loudly to speak above the noise of the street and cars, i said, “just make a decision. No one seems to care.”

He took that as me being TOO bossy by telling him what to do, yelling at him as my voice was raised, and the second i said it, i knew. Ughhhhhh. i was honestly trying NOT to be bossy.

But damn it… no one, including David was deciding anything. Why take off walking, in the lead position, with us all following for you to just stop and ask where we want to go!? Don’t you already have a plan?! But even if you don’t, no one else is responding… implying they either don’t care or don’t want to say, either way…. YOU need to just decide already!!!

After i spoke, he cocked his head, folded his arms, raised his eyebrows, and slowly nodded his head. He said nothing out loud. If he had spoken, i suspect his words would have been something like, “Alright. So THAT’s how you want to play this?! And how you want to speak to me?! I don’t have to yell. We have a better solution for this. And you already knew your two options for our arrival home. I guess you made your choice.”

Great. Justttttt great! Whatever. It is what it is. i didn’t think this was fair, but okay, fine.

i tried to take opportunities throughout the rest of the day to talk to David about this, but with others around us all day, it was a challenge. i did get to plead my case and tell him what happened. He never quite conceded but he did say, “I haven’t decided yet (if I agree with you or think your behavior should be excused) if I’ll spank you or not. Ut don’t give me anymore reason either!”

So i have a chance of escaping a “spanking worthy of (me) calling out RED.”

(In case you aren’t already aware, we have safe words where i call ‘yellow’ to say, “please slow down, i can’t take much more.” And red for, “stop right now, i am done.” It is fully understood that i use the safe words quite sparingly and their use will never be abused (by me). i am to accept discipline and never refuse, as this is our lifestyle and agreement, but… on rare occasions, if David doesn’t read my body language well enough to know i am at my very limits, i have safe words. To date, i have called yellow about 2-3 times and never used red.)

At this moment, I think it is 50/50 chance to orgasm or to be spanked. Either way, in about 24-mor hours, we will begin Locktober too. i pray it starts with pleasure and not pain!!

But… the weekend isn’t over and i have a 90% chance of getting it wrong still too!




  1. I like the post. I don’t understand why you were threatened with a red safeword spanking. Maybe that’s one of those “you have to be there ” situations..
    Thanx bunches for the post!!!

    • Paddlefan,
      Ahead of any trouble whatsoever, I think David was saying that I can either be on BEST or WORST behavior for the weekend. I think he just didn’t anticipate or foresee a middle ground.

  2. Just curious is spanking the only form of punishment you receive or do you have less painful things for lesser misbehavior. Usually for me if my girlfriend spoke to me like that I would wash her mouth out with a bar of soap or maybe corner time. I find this keeps her from fretting to much if she just slightly steps out of line

    • Matthew, I wouldn’t say I have too many punishments besides spankings. On occasion David has used others but it’s not frequent. I think he finds the spankings to work best. I’d probably agree. Marie

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