265 – just call me Little Miss Stubborn!

i am acting out today. i don’t entirely know why i am acting this way, but i am. And David is unimpressed.

So far i have escaped punishment, but i think if i continue to carry on this way it will not end well for me.

So i told you in my last post that at the end of our Maintenance Friday session, Sir told me to put on the chastity belt. And i did.

i slept in it last night and have worn it all day today. i have no immediate end in sight either. Mostly because of my own attitude problems!

This morning, David went off to play golf and i stayed home. Unless you count the belt, i have stayed naked all day today. And in the process of being alone, and in my own mind, i have managed to get myself angry that i am still locked up.

i texted David while he was golfing and asked if i could have the key. When he asked me why, i didn’t have a good reason and so he said No.

And as the day has worn on, the obsession with getting out has become my sole focus. Every time David commented on something, related or not, i managed to bring it up. And the answer has been “no” every time.

Twice now he’s asked me, “Do you need to Assume The Position? Because we can cure you of this attitude.” To which i responded with, “i don’t want to,” but admittedly, my behavior would suggest otherwise!

At one point, i texted Sir saying, “i am throwing my own (mental) temper tantrum over being in this belt. i don’t want to wear it anymore today.”

i continued, “if i were a toddler, i’d be in hysterics and screaming, while crying, “let me out!” And if i were a teen, i’d be throwing down anger while screaming, “this is stupid. You are being unfair and untrusting! i don’t deserve this.”

He didn’t care. And that made me madder still.

He said, “Remember. You did this to yourself.”

When i responded with on,y the word “ok” was when he asked me the first time if i needed to Assume The Position. Maybe i should’ve said yes, as he’d likely let me out to be able to spank me!

Now since he’s been home, he smiles a wicked smile at me and keeps on walking. Once he did ask if i NEEDED to be let out. i told him MENTALLY i do. He said that wasn’t a need worth entertaining.

Then another time he asked me, “why exactly do you want to be out?”

And the thing is, i don’t really know. i think it’s just the fact that it doesn’t seem necessary. Or maybe it’s because he’s home, so he should want it open to play with. Or maybe it’s because i feel like he’s not trusting me. Or maybe it’s just because i do!

When I didn’t really have any answer at all, he said, “you just want out to play with yourself and there’s no reason for that as I’m not allowing that at this time.”

Now you’d think this would be enough for me to get my head screwed on straight. i mean, really…. i have no valid reason for wanting out. i agreed to submit, so… submit already!

And if that submission means he wants HIS pussy locked up, then it is what it is! i should be happy and thankful that he cares enough to lock it up!

i know all this. i know it’s fact. i know it’s nothing i want to change.

i just ALSO want to be unlocked. Or maybe i just want to know when i will be unlocked.

Maybe it’s that i just don’t know when the lock will be sprung. In the most recent long-time locked sessions, i knew it was because David was out of town, AND i knew when he would return. So i could (and did) mentally prepare myself to get to the finish line.

But NOW.

Now i don’t know when or where the finish line is! It might be in 5-minutes or 5-days!

Unfortunately you’d think i would just get into my submissive mind and be ok with this. But instead, while i am done pouting and screaming and throwing a temper tantrum…. i am getting to the Stubborn-stage. i am now digging in my heels.

i now am like, “fine. See if i care. i will wear this belt and you get denied too! Because while i can’t play, neither can you!!”

And i know he knows that i am now becoming stubborn. He asked me why i was. When i shrugged, he laughed and said, “ok. That’s fine.”

The thing is, David is just as stubborn as i am! He can (probably) hold out longer than me on this one as HE HAS THE KEY.

And even if he wants to use me, he can produce the key, unlock, use, and relock at his will.

Frankly, he has NO reason to let me out before i change my attitude! All he has to do is sit back… and wait.

i know…. This is SO stupid on my part. i don’t hold the key and i don’t have any idea where it is! And i got myself into the belt for suggesting to David last night that he shouldn’t allow me to orgasm. AND i have agreed to submit. AND this belt is comfortable (overall). AND there is NO reason to be out….. Except that i want to be!

We shall see, but i won’t be surprised if i am in this belt tonight too. Hell, at the rate i am going… it may be tonight AND tomorrow night too! i may hit a new high for the length of consecutive time in belt!

i am going to try to change my attitude. i know it’s in my own best interest!

Hugs,

Marie

8 comments

  1. Should I just copy and paste some of what I wrote on that other blog? Lol. You and I both know the worst thing David could do is let you out of that thing. *Wink*. Here’s where the rubber meets the pavement as they say. Here’s submission – yielding to his will ( not like you have a choice! Lol ) Honestly if you suggested it last night, then he cannot make it his own if he lets you out. Time to put on the big girl panties ( if they fit over that thing lol! ) AND try to submit gracefully – which reminds me of another saying, those who can do, those who can’t coach ( I think it’s supposed to be teach but I’m far from a teacher! Lol).

    Good luck!
    willie

    • Willie,
      I know….. I’m being stupid. And yes, I already read/agreed with you on that other blog. So… Here i am calling the kettle black! 🙄

      I know I need his authority in my life. I agree with you that he has to make it his own and I need to yield. I’m trying. I think I needed to blog about it to get (some/most) of it outta my system.

      And panties DO fit over it, as it fits quite snuggly against my skin. Most of the time I don’t wear them over it, because.. well.. what’s the point?! But your point is true and valid. Time to put them on and grow up!

      Thank you!! ❤️

  2. IMHO You are obviously having submission growing pains. Of course a good paddling would probably cure it and maybe that is what it will take. However I think I better things of you.. I believe you can make an executive decision to tell David you have willingly decided to graciously sub mit to his decision (Sir) and behave like a truly submissive wife would. After all, you know that what you are doing is not true submission.. I have faith in one of the most submissive wives I know..You have promised him authority in your marriage. Keep the promise the way you know you should.
    Thanks for this post. As usual it is great!

    • Thank you Paddlefan. I may well end up having a good paddling, but as the day is going on I AM doing better. Time will tell for sure. Marie

  3. You’re reacting normally for someone who’s had their privileges taken away.

    Mentally you still seem to think it’s your right to have your pussy available.

    • V,
      You are SO right! I just got through saying (yesterday) that having the belt off is a privilege and has to be earned. And now that I don’t have it, I’m mad. And acting stupid.

      I do need to change my attitude and recognize and realize, it’s not my pussy.

      Thank you! Marie

  4. I agree with Paddlefan that it seems you are having submissive growing pains but I have no doubt David is going to guide you through it. when I made my girlfriend give up wearing bras she was the same way constantly wanting to wear them without a solid reason but with time she started to appreciate it. I have no doubt soon being in chastity will be perfectly normal too you

    • Matthew,
      You are probably right! When David made me give up bras, that was what I wanted to wear too… for no good reason too! But now, I almost hate to wear them as they feel foreign. Maybe chastity will become that for me soon! Maybe I should start thinking of it like the bra thing too!

      Thank you! Marie

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