i have been C-O-M-P-L-E-T-E-L-Y frustrated….. with David.
So i told you last time our routine is nowhere near a “routine” right now. And i plugged myself. And he found it. And said i was to stay that way until further notice.
Well…. he initially said that would be the next day. And i cringed. Wondered how in the world i would accomplish that. But i deserved it and would figure it out. And i was doing just that.
My butt was getting sore though, but i refused to complain. i mean i sure as hell wanted to, but i didn’t. Why? Because i refused to be a brat about it. i earned the punishment and i wasn’t going to accept it. i ultimately pride that he cared enough to notice and do it, and pride in myself that i did indeed sign up for this lifestyle and was going to abide by it.
All for not.
He noticed i was starting to “dance” around. i couldn’t exactly get comfortable and the plug was starting to cause my butt to be very sore. And he inquired. So i spoke honestly.
That’s when he said, “if you want to take it out now, you can”.
W-H-Y give out a punishment to just change your mind? Why even act like you care enough to punish if you really don’t? And how is this showing you as in charge?
i mean, let’s break this down….
1) a plug won’t cause permanent damage
2) having it in “too long” will just rub me raw, but that will heal.
3) a raw butt would just cause me to think twice next time.
4) sympathy. You felt bad. You felt your punishment was too harsh. So you relinquished. (But the punishment wasn’t too harsh. It established you as the authority first and final)
So you just frustrated me. And caused me to lose (some) respect.
How to get it back? Respect, authority, and discipline. We both need it, we thrive in this relationship, and falter when we don’t stick to it.
So i forced David’s hand. Quite literally.
Our weekly maintenance spankings have a routine.
On the maintenance day, i get home from work and go straight into our bedroom. i undress. completely. 100% naked. i don’t speak to anyone for any reason.
i get the paddle out of the drawer.
i lean over the bed. The upper half of my body is laying flat on the bed, with the lower half is off the bed with my feet on the floor.
And i place the paddle in the small of my back.
When David comes in, he grabs the paddle and he warms my butt. And then he spanks. Until he thinks i’ve had enough to turn it red, remember who is in charge, and to be reminded to remember submission is what our house is about.
And typically, if i have accepted this spanking with grace, without complaint, or defiance – it ends with him rewarding me with his fingers finding my sweet spot between my legs. And i get to cum freely.
i decided to do just that… all that i said above. Without discussion or being on “the day” (Friday).
We haven’t talked about maintenance or any spanking in a longggggg time. And i had my fill. i was done waiting. i was done trying to leave hints. i decided it was long overdue.
So yesterday at the end of work, i went home and prepared as if it was “the day”. And i waited.
It didn’t take long and in came David. He made a comment, “oh, I see what you want”. And he picked up the paddle and turned my butt beet red. It was hot when he was done. And throbbed for quite a few hours. He did it as if we had never stopped.
When he was done, i told him he has to be in charge and be authoritative and stop second guessing discipline. He agreed.
So in a way, you could say i forced his hand. i forced domestic discipline. On my ass. And it hurt. But i was pleased.